Red Sky at Morning
by Princess Bertha
Summary: Finally, finally, finally complete! Major BLACKWATER. Sequel to "Endless Daylight." Jake and Sam can't *both* be Alpha, can they? Nessie wants to go to school. No one's happy about Jake and Leah, except...the Cullens?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own **_**Twilight**_**, Stephanie Meyer does. If I owned **_**Twilight **_**and its sequels, it would have been Blackwater.**

**Author's Note:** This chapter is dedicated to all the people who read the last chapter of "Endless Daylight" and wanted to murder me for having Jacob leave. Hopefully you see why it had to happen.

This is the sequel to **"Endless Daylight."** You don't have to read it though to read this one. **However, **"Daylight" does a lot of character development, so if you are going to be really bothered by Leah hanging out with Rosalie, then either read the first one or just trust me that it's at least possible. "Daylight" is about Leah's character arc after _Breaking Dawn_, and I don't really see it as a romance, although there are certainly some Blackwater make-out scenes. "Red Sky at Morning" _is_ a romance. In fact, it's has its title because "Leah and Jacob Get It On—A Lot" didn't have the right ring to it. So if you hate Blackwater and are reading this hoping that Jacob ends up with Nessie, well, you should probably stop.

On the other hand, if you hate Nessie and would just as soon pretend she didn't exist, then you might not like this, because I'm not discounting _BD_ at all. Jacob's still imprinted.

If you're skipping Endless Daylight, all you really need to know is that Jacob, after realizing his feelings for Leah, left to go run around in Canada while he tries to make sense of his imprint.

* * *

One of the best things about Jacob Black is his smell. The leeches think I'm crazy, but _oh god_ does he smell good. Musky. Sometimes, if he's just phased back to human form, it's especially piney. The only thing better than how he smells is the way he tastes.

Which is basically all I can think about right now, since he's kissing me. His skin is so warm, warmer even than my own. My sheets are tangled around us, and we're laying side by side. That's no good. So I put my hand on his shoulder and tug. He laughs and falls on top of me and we kiss again, his tongue in my mouth. He's being bold, aggressive. I like that. And I like how much our bodies are touching, naked, skin against skin. We press together and I moan into his mouth. His hands are on me and oh god, I wrap my legs around him and tangle my hands in his hair, and I know that if he weren't a shape-shifter he'd have marks on his back tomorrow from my nails and _god_ and….

….and then my alarm goes off.

I open my eyes. I glare at the alarm. God damn alarm clock I throw my pillow at it, but of course it's still going off. And this is why I hate my life.

God, why did that have to be a dream? Why can't I have Jacob Black for real? Oh, right, because he's in stupid _Canada_. I hereby hate Canada. And their damn maple syrup. What's so great about maple syrup anyway?

I roll out of bed and stand up. Ugh, another day. I'm wearing the shorts Rosalie got me as part of my last Christmas present—they're those little tiny shorts that barely cover your ass. So I sleep in them. I guess normal girls like wear them around and stuff outside of the house but not me. Rosalie had them custom made—they say "Wolf Girl" across my ass. Yay. Just what I always wanted. Still, it's nice to have shorts for PJs, since my body temp is so high that I don't like sleeping in pants.

Ew, I am _way_ too old to be living at home. At my age most people are in college, or hell, maybe even done. And what am I doing? Oh, right. Chillin' on the Rez looking after the "crappy little renegade pack." I guess it's part of being a werewolf. You can't exactly take classes when you might accidentally phase at any second. Still, by now most of the wolves have themselves together enough so they don't phase accidentally. I haven't accidentally phased in months, or maybe even a year. So I really gotta get a life or something, but until Jake comes back, I have to play Alpha, and baby-sit his annoying little imprint monster.

I wander out into the kitchen. I should make myself breakfast or something. Mom's already up and at her job. Maybe she left food for me? Nope, doesn't look like it. _But_, on the upside, none of the food in the kitchen has "do not eat" on it, so it's all fair game. I'm rooting around in the bottom drawer of the fridge for some cheese for scrabbled eggs when the back door opens.

"Hey Dweeb," I say into the fridge. Dweeb is not a nickname; it's an actual description of my little brother Seth. If you've never met the guy, just look up 'ridiculous' in the dictionary and there will be a little picture of him.

"Nice shorts," says a male voice, definitely not belonging to Seth. I'd freak out that there's a strange man in my house, but' it's just Embry.

"Why are you in my house?" I ask tiredly. Aha! The cheese! So I stand up and turn around to glare at him. My brother is just coming in the back door.

"Hiya Leah! Embry's over, is that okay?" he asks.

I shrug and roll my eyes.

"Are you going to make us breakfast?" Seth asks hopefully. "We were out running patrols!"

"I told you that you didn't have to do that," I say. Honestly, there aren't any big scary vamps in the area chomping humans, so we don't really need to do patrols. Then again, if we don't phase, we age. And I'd rather have them running around the forest than around here annoying me. Since Jake left last year, Embry and Seth have started hanging out a lot. It makes sense, since Quil is always off with Claire (what is she now, like seven?) and they don't have much to talk about with the boys in Sam's pack. "And no, I am not making you two breakfast. You can make your own damn breakfast."

"Emily used to cook for us," Embry says, still giving me that look. The one he's been giving me a lot lately. Maybe I should take him aside and have a talk with him. Of course, it'd be like shooting a puppy.

"Yeah, well, go back to Sam and maybe his darlin' wife will make you some muffins," I snap.

"Damn, Leah, why are you always such a bitch?" Embry says, taking a step closer to me. Yeah, I am really going to have to talk to him. "Oh, wait, you can't help it, because 'bitch' is another name for female dog!"

"Oh, Embry, why are you such a bastard all the time? Oh wait, you can't help it, because 'bastard' is another name for a kid whose—"

"Could you guys not argue right now?" asks Seth. Since Embry's been over here a lot, playing Halo or whatever with the Dweeb, I guess Seth's been hearing a lot of our 'friendly banter.' Seth changes tack and says "Please, Leah, feed us?" He sounds so pathetic, too.

"Whatever. I'm making scrambled eggs for myself, so I'll just make some extra," Ugh. Why do I do this for them? I'm not freaking _Emily_! I don't need to cook for wolves to feel like I'm a part of the pack.

As I break the entire carton of eggs into a skillet, I glance over at the calendar. There's a little star sticker stuck on today. It's blue. Ew. I knew there was a reason I didn't want to wake up today. Blue stars are how I remind myself when I have an appointment with the doctor.

"Wanna play Halo with us?" asks Seth. Okay, gross. Why the hell would I want to play Halo?

"No, moron, I don't want to play your stupid video game."

"Because you suck at it and we always snipe you!" says Embry, laughing at me.

"Whatever. I'm going to see Dr. Fang today."

"Uh, why, did he find a cure for your Bitch Illness?" I hate Embry. Let me just say that right now. He's _sooo_ annoying. All he does is eat our food and insult me (starting to see how Jacob feels about Paul).

* * *

It's pretty convenient that there're so many wooded areas around here—makes transportation easier. Otherwise I might have to like, get a car or something. Or I could just steal Edward's Ducati. I bet he wouldn't even notice. Yeah it must be nice to get to roll around in money. I bet that's what he and Bella do instead of sex, just cuddle with bags of money.

I phase as close to the Forks Community Hospital as I can. Dr. Cullen doesn't have his own office at a clinic or anything, since this is Forks, and there's not much. Wooo one grocery store! Still, there's more at Forks than on the Rez.

So I pull on some shorts (not the Wolf Girl booty shorts that Embry was admiring—ew) and a tanktop. Bra and undies of course, and yes, those go on before the shorts and tank top. It's actually a little gross knowing that none of the boy wolves wear underwear. I mean, it's kind of too much information. The only one I really _want_ to know that about is Jake, but I can't fantasize about it without remembering that they all do that, and on the others it's just icky.

I don't know what the People of Forks think about a random Indian girl walking out of the forest and across the street to the hospital—oh wait, probably no one noticed because Forks has a population of seven and a half. The hospital only has two floors, and I take the elevator up. One of the nurses recognizes me and smiles. If they think it's weird that Carlisle has a patient coming to see him at the hospital, they've gotten over it. This is about my fifth visit.

Finally he emerges and waves me into the same examining room he always uses. "Good day, Miss Clearwater," he says in his creepy vampire voice. Ok, so I don't get why all the nurses and like every other woman in the world are all swoony over him. And his sons. Leeches are kind of weird. Their skin is all marbley and ice cold. Which is why I will never understand Bella. If I had a choice between Edward, who is made of cold granite (and kind of a prude) and Jacob, who is super-warm and covered in muscle (not like Emmett's muscles, actually even better) I'd jump Jacob. Oh wait, I kept trying to jump him. And then he ran off to freakin' Cananda.

"Everything normal?" the doctor is asking, as he's tying one of those annoying tourniquet bands on my arm. Yeah, I come to the hospital so that a vamp can drain some of my blood. Ironic, or fitting, I don't know.

"As normal as it ever is for me. So have you found anything yet?" Carlisle's been examining my blood—the blood of the World's Only She-Wolf—and Nessie's, and Nahuel's (he paid Nessie a visit right before Jacob took off which made exactly zero people happy). As well as vampire venom. He started by trying to figure out as much as he can about what Nessie has in common with us. Then he was looking at whether or not she'll be fertile. Which I would have thought was answered when she got per period last month, at age what? Five? But apparently that didn't answer anything for the doctor. He's not sure if her eggs are viable ("mules, after all, can't breed.") He's actually written to the Volturi and asked them to send the remains of the one of Nahuel's sisters (yeah, there are more at large) that they killed so he can dissect it. Just when I thought the Casa de Leeches couldn't get any creepier, now I am going to have to worry about dissected vampire-hybrid bodies lying around…

Anyway, lately he's been studying _me_, trying to figure out why I phased, why I stopped menstrating. He's also trying to learn more about imprinting. I guess when you're immortal, you have a lot of time on your hands. He really wants blood samples from Sam's pack, too. Aha.

"No, I don't think so. I'd love to figure out how you and the other wolves went from being humans to shapeshifters. Presumably you had 23 chromosomal pairs before you phased, and then suddenly you had 24. Or maybe you always had 24, but I think someone would have noticed that before…" his voice trails off. He's watching the blood fill the container.

"Getting hungry?" I ask.

He smiles and shakes his head. "I'm around blood all day, Miss Clearwater, and I can control myself. Anyway, your blood isn't exactly appetizing."

"Yeah, Jasper's always telling me you guys don't eat dog."

"I think there was a time in Edward's life when he might have hunted wolves, just out of spite," he says, pulling the needle out of my arm. I laugh.

"You need a bandaid?" he asks.

"Please, don't insult me." I look down at my arm, and the tiny needle-prick is already closing. "But if you have any lollipops, I'll take one."

He laughs and finds a sucker for me in a drawer. It's grape flavored. Not my favorite, but what can you do? Damn vamps don't appreciate flavor. "Oh, Miss Clearwater, I hear congratulations are in order."

I look at him blankly.

"For your mother, I mean," he adds.

"Oh, right. Yeah, she's pretty excited." I shrug.

He looks at me and says, "I'm sure she's not trying to replace your father."

I shrug. "I know that. Everyone acts like I'm going to freak out, but I'm actually happy. I mean, Charlie is a good guy. And at least he and my dad were friends. I'd be kinda mad if it was just some random dude."

"I think Bella's in shock."

"That doesn't surprise me," I say, and then, and god help me if I know why I am getting all chatty with the leech doctor, "Mom wants me and Bella to wear complimentary dresses. Like, hers will be purple with white and mine will be white with purple."

He laughs and I think he is trying to figure out which of us will need more convincing.

* * *

I'm leaving the hospital now, with my grape sucker. I get quite a few looks, especially from the men. I guess it's not every day that 6 foot tall girls swagger around the hospital in shorts. Whatever. I don't even like men. (Wanting to sleep with Jacob is different. It doesn't count.)

I'm almost to the forest when I hear my name being called. I turn. Oh. God. It's _Sam_. He's waving at me from across the street. Waving me over to him. I consider flipping him off and wolfing it back to La Push, but for some reason (drugged grape lollipop?) I go over to him.

"Hey, Lee-Lee," he says. _Hey, asshat_, I think. "What're you doing out here?"

Ugh. As if I need to answer to Sam about anything. I consider kicking him in the balls, elbowing his nose, breaking it, and running off…but I realize he might just be trying to be nice.

I was a good little wolf, I went to his stupid wedding and wished him and Emily well, and I was honest about it, too. But _god_ does it piss me off when he calls me 'Lee-Lee.'

"I had a doctor's appointment," I guess if he's being nice, I can make polite conversation.

"You okay?" he asks, brows furrowing. Ew, don't act like you care about me, jackass.

"Yeah. Just some routine blood work."

His eyes bulge out of his head. "Leah! Are you insane! You can't compromise our secret like that!" He leans in close to me and hisses, "Someone could find out! What are you thinking?"

"Relax. It was the leech doctor. He's studying me." I'm tempted to stick my tongue out. Like 'you might think I'm a freak, but Dr. Glitter finds me a fascinating!' Instead I just smirk at him in what I hope is an annoying way.

Now he looks angry. "You and your brother spend too much time with the Cold Ones," He says.

I roll my eyes. "Good thing I'm not in your pack then isn't it."

"I guess so. Because if you _were_, I'd command you to stop going over there. They're our _enemies_, Leah, does that not mean anything to you?"

I take a deep breath. I'm really tempted to just stick my lollipop in his eyesocket and move it around, but I don't think Jacob would be happy with me if he came back and saw that I'd murdered Sam Uley with a sucker. I could hide the body, though. No one would ever know…

"Whatever, Sam. Is there a reason you called me over here?"

"Oh. I was going to offer you a ride home," he says, lamely, like he knows he's been a jerk.

I bite my lip. A ride home? What the fuck? In Sam's car? The car in whose backseat I used to let him have sex with me? Huh, that's a tempting offer. Then I look over to the car behind him. It's a new one. It's… a minivan.

Sam has a minivan.

That's funny.

"Yeah, okay, sure, in your minivan," I say, laughing. "Why are you out here with a car, anyway?"

"Groceries. Emily wanted me to pick up a lot of stuff. She gets these weird cravings."

"Well, she _is_ pregnant with a werewolf baby," I say. Emily's about 4 months along. Carlisle asked me to ask Emily to come to him for her doctoring needs but I haven't dared. Sam would freak. Poor Emily, though. They don't want to risk taking her to a normal doctor, because they aren't sure what he or she might find. The last time an actual wolf had a baby was in our great-grandfather's time, and Mrs. Black, Mrs. Uley and Mrs. Atera didn't go to a doctor.

I get in the minivan. Hopefully we will now stop arguing. "Is Jacob back?" he asks. Ok, apparently we aren't going to stop arguing. Because I know where this is going. He's been pulling this ever since Jake left.

"No. If he were, you probably would have noticed. He's the only wolf bigger than you."

"He shouldn't have left his pack like that."

"He left it in good hands. I'm related to the last Alpha _and _the last beta," I snap. How dare he talk to me like this? I've got more Alpha blood than he does.

Sam's mouth is a thin line. "Being an Alpha isn't just about running around or whatever it is your pack does. There are actual responsibilities. He's been gone what, a year and a half?" I just shrug. Yeah, about that long. It's not like I care. (Lie.) "And you guys need to stop phasing so much."

"What? Which is it? Either the 'Cold Ones' are a threat to us, or there's no reason to keep phasing." What the hell? And he's been like this for, well, a year and a half. And yes, I did air quotes for "Cold Ones."

"As soon as the _Cullens_," he says the name with as much disgust as possible, "leave, you need to stop phasing. If you keep phasing you won't age." Yeah, Sam, that's why I like it. "And if you don't age, you risk exposing our secret. We can't take that risk."

Oh my god. I really want Jake to be home right now so he can tell Sam to stuff it. Because apparently me telling him doesn't seem to get through his thick male skull. I know Sam thinks he's, what, Chief of our Tribe now? By some ridiculous old law that gives it to the Alpha? But it should be Jacob. Then again, Sam does have a point—with Jacob gone, there's no question that Sam's the Alpha right now. Whatever. Stupid men.

He must be thinking the same thing, because he adds, "Leah, you and your pack should really think about coming back."

"Thanks but no," I say. "No offense, but being in your pack was basically the suckiest thing in my life. Ever."

He looks over at me and sighs. "We've come a long way since then, Lee-Lee."

Oh really? Then why are you still calling me Lee-Lee, jackass?

"Anyway," why is he still talking? If he keeps talking to me, I am going to actually murder him and then the car will crash and that will suck for me because then I'll be running from the scene of a crime possibly with car pieces sticking out of me, which will sort of cramp my style. "Emily and I are having a party tomorrow night. With all the guys from the pack and their imprints. You and Embry and Seth and Quil should come. I mean, Claire will be there, anyway, with her mom, so Quil will want to be there."

What, does he think that if _Quil_ goes then I will? But I nod. Jacob worked hard to get the packs on equitable terms. So the least I can do is keep things that way.

* * *

Seth and Embry are going to walk over to Sam's house with me. I'm actually really tempted to take Scott, my Italian Greyhound, but my mom tells me to just leave him home with her. Scott's pretty small—just a little too big to be a purse dog (thank god. I couldn't deal with that. And no he doesn't yap). Basically a tiny greyhound. He was a present from Rosalie and Alice, since I'm the smallest wolf, and I'm grey… and also Rosalie and I first started get along when we agreed that men are dogs. Hence, Scott.

But I decide to wear the necklace. Last Christmas, Rosalie and Emmett, in addition to the shorts (well, those were just from Rosalie), gave me a really nice new collar for Scott. It has a circle hanging from it that's engraved with his name and my phone number. But being that it's from the Cullens, it's a Tiffany's. A Tiffany's dog collar. From the people who have money as their wallpaper.

And I have a matching one. From Alice and Jasper. On a long chain so I can phase with it on. (Can't beat the bloodsuckers' sense of humor.) It's even silver (Yeah, real funy, guys, giving silver to the werewolf.) Engraved on it is a quotation that Jasper told me, "You were wild here once, don't let them tame you." Well, it's better than having "Leah Clearwater" and my number on it. That's just demeaning.

The pendant hangs down between my breasts, under my shirt. But it's important to me to wear it tonight—a medallion against Sam.

So I pet Scott goodbye and head out of the door with the boys.

"Is it just me, or is this going to get really awkward?" asks Seth.

* * *

We've been here a few hours. Seth is blessed with his ability to get along with almost anyone. Well, I guess one of us had to get the Nice Genes. I made some polite conversation with my pregnant cousin. Oohed and ahhhed over her belly. Yay! Let's flaunt our pregnancy to the infertile girl!

Rachel comes over to talk to me while Paul is arguing/talking with Embry and Quil. "Hey, Leah," she says, and smiles. I always used to look up to her—for one thing, she's gorgeous (sort of like her little brother) and for another, she was smart _and_ popular in our small school. "How are you?"

I shrug. "Fine, you?"

"Yeah, I'm alright. Um, you haven't heard anything from my brother, have you?"

I shake my head, "No, sorry."

"Oh. Dad's…not as worried as I would have thought. He seems to think it's important for him to be off on this adventure or whatever."

Actually, Billy just likes anything that takes Jacob away from Nessie, but I don't tell her that.

"He always speaks very highly of you, you know. Dad, I mean."

I smile at that. Billy just wants me to seduce his son and give him, Billy, non-leech grandkids. He doesn't see my infertility as a barrier to this dream, either. Speaking of Billy's grandchildren, I wonder if Rachel and Paul are going to tie the not any time soon. I'm just about to answer when she says,

"Oh! Congratulations to your mom! That's so exciting. Do you know when they'll have the wedding?"

I shake my head. "Not yet. I'm glad no one's upset about it."

"Why? Because Charlie's white? Yeah, well, he's practically Quileute anyway," she says. "Do they have a location?"

"I don't know. It's presenting some problems. Mom's on the Council, so I think she's being pressured to get married here on the Rez,"

"Oooh! On First Beach would be lovely!" Rachel gushes.

"Yeah, but then, the Cullens are invited, so yeah."

She frowns. "Oh. They are?"

I nod. "One of them is going to be my stepsister, remember?" Her frown deepens. She must have inherited Billy's hatred of the Cullens. But then, her own brother is imprinted on Nessie. Which means if Jacob and Nessie got married, _she'd_ be related to the Cullens, too. Good thing for everyone that Jake doesn't think of Nessie like that, then, right?

I wonder for a second if Billy recruited Rachel to the plan—bribed her to be nice to me so I'd be more likely to get with Jacob. I should really just tell him he doesn't need to do anything, except maybe tell the Canadian Mounties to drive a large red wolf back down to the US.

We make some more polite small talk. Actually, Rachel's pretty cool. Much better than, say, Kim. Okay, so I shouldn't hate Kim. I barely even know her. But something about her reminds me of Bella. She's always draped over Jared with that horrible dopey lovey look in her eyes. God I hate people in love.

Not that I'm bitter or anything.

Then I look over toward the door and see Embry inching toward it. I catch his eye and mouth "let's go." He nods and I tell Rachel I have to leave. "Have to walk Embry home, you know, so nothing happens to him."

I check with Seth—he wants to stay awhile, and Quil's still here, with Claire. So I leave with Embry.

We start walking home in silence. Embry lives sort of close to me. In the same direction, anyway. Or maybe he will just hang around my house eating food until Seth comes home and they stay up all night playing Halo. Honestly, sometimes I think Seth and Embry have imprinted on each other. I laugh.

"What?" he asks.

"Just thinking about how you and Seth could have imprinted on each other from how you've been acting."

Rather than get mad, he barks out a laugh. "Yeah, except more like Seth and Jacob. Honestly, Seth worships him… I'm surprised we're not all dreaming about Jacob from hearing Seth, the way we all used to have Bella dreams from Jake."

Yeah. Dreams about Jacob. Indeed. Um.

We walk along in silence awhile longer.

"Leah…" he says finally. Oh god. Oh, please, Embry, don't say anything stupid! Thank god he's shy. Well, except when he's insulting me, but then again, I sort of started that with him when we in Sam's pack. The sad thing is that Embry's actually really good looking. Lots of girls would probably be really happy with him—of course, he can't really have a girlfriend, until he stops phasing or whatever. But…he's just not Jacob. He's muscled, yes. Tall, yes. But… not Jacob. I can't look at him the way I look at Jake. My life would probably be a lot easier if I just seduced Embry right now and married him like a good little Wolf Girl.

"Hey, Embry," I say, cutting off whatever he was going to say. "I have something I should tell you." He looks at me curiously. "Okay, so you know how when we were in Sam's pack I was always talking about your dad?"

He sighs. This probably wasn't what he thought I was going to say. "Yeah, I remember. Sort of hard to forget."

"I really wasn't doing it to be mean to you, specifically. I mean, I was pissed at everyone, because you all looked at me and just thought of me as Sam's cast-off," he starts to protest, but I keep going, "But like, I always figured that you and Sam had the same father. And Sam's dad was a jerk. Sam always used to talk about how mad he was that his dad had abandoned his mom. One time after we'd done it, he was being all cuddly and talking about how he'd never leave a woman like that."

Embry looks kind of shocked. Probably because I just made a reference to Sex With Sam. "Anyway, I think Sam always thought you were his brother, too, so I sort of used to bring it up to piss Sam off, and remind him about, you know…"

We sink back into silence for a few minutes until he speaks. "We didn't think of you that way, you know. I mean, we all looked up to Sam a lot. So yeah, when you guys broke up, Jared and I felt sorry for you because we all knew about imprinting and you didn't. But Leah, it was weird. I mean, when you used to think about kissing him, that was awkward. We didn't exactly like knowing what it was like to be with Sam like that. Anyway, none of us had ever had girlfriends, and here was Sam, with you _and_ with Emily. Mostly we just hoped Sam would rub off on us and we'd get hot girlfriends too."

And then we fall back into awkward silence. I guess he feels like he should say something else, just so we're not walking home in the dead quiet, because he adds, "it was like when Jacob started hanging out with Bella. It was pretty impressive, him getting this older girl."

I contemplate telling Embry that I'm sort of going to screw Jacob's brains out the second he comes back to La Push. 'So, Embry, guess what? Jake and I had some really hot make-out sessions and I am going to do things to him that Bella never could have, even if she'd wanted to.' That'd be pretty awkward though. Fwakward, even. (My new word). But then he'd stop looking at me in that sad little almost hopeful way.

There was a time, after Sam left me, hell, even after I phased, well, especially after I phased, when my self-confidence was shot to hell, that I'd be flattered. Now I just feel bad.

We hear someone behind us and turn. Our hearing is better even in human form that it was before we phased the first time. Hearing and smell. (And living with Seth, you sort of don't want an advanced sense of smell.) It's Jared. "Hey, guys, you disappeared, and Sam wanted to make sure you were alright…" he says lamely.

"You mean Sam wanted to make sure we weren't going off to visit the bloodsuckers tonight," I whisper to Embry. He shivers. Embry's not exactly the leeches Number One Fan (Seth is. He got promoted when Leechlover Numero Uno became a leech herself).

"Tell Sam we're fine, and we had a great time at his party," Embry says.

"Leah, he was sort of hoping you'd stick around and bond with Rachel, Kim and Emily. He said to tell you it'd be good for you," Jared is clearly just reciting something Sam told him to say. God, I can't believe he followed us all this way. Ok, we are not that far from Sam's house, but still. Sam needs to mind his own damn business.

"Tell Sam I did bond with them, it was lovely, I had a lovely time, really, really lovely, but now I've got to go—I have a threesome planned with those two Romanian vamps and I don't want to keep them waiting."

And then I turn and start walking down the street. Embry runs to catch up. "Wow," he says.

"That will get Sam to stay out of my life," I mutter.

Embry just looks at me. "Quil says his dad says he's been talking to the Council a lot. Trying to figure out what to do about our pack. Maybe you shouldn't antagonize them with the Cold Ones stuff."

I shrug. "Whatever." My mom said the same thing as Quil Sr. As if Sam would dare do anything.

* * *

"So your Wolf Boy still isn't back yet?" Rosalie asks, swinging her golf club at the ball and hitting it. It flies. Far.

"Obviously."

She shrugs, "Can't say I miss being constantly told blonde jokes or having to smell him, but he's really been gone a long time," she mutters, putting another ball down for me. "I still can't get over that you asked him if he was going to find himself 'hiding under a rock in Canada' when he told you he had to find himself. That's funny."

I smirk and hit the ball. As hard as I can. "You know, we're probably murdering squirrels or whatever with these balls."

We're standing on the roof of the Cullen's mansion. Yes, hitting golf balls. It's surprisingly fun. Even in the rain. Perhaps especially in the rain. More of a drizzle, really.

"Wanna see if we can hit Edward's house?" asks Rosalie. I nod.

We've also got an umbrella up here with us. It's to keep the rain off the chocolates. Yeah, so the leeches feed me chocolate sometimes. Well, Rosalie gives me chocolate whenever I have to deal with Sam. I've just finished telling her about his party. I'm reaching for another chocolate when the window in the attic opens and Emmett climbs out onto the roof.

"What the hell?" he asks. "Are you two seriously hitting golf balls off the roof?"

"No. We're having hot lesbian sex and you missed it," snaps Rosalie.

"Ha. But seriously, why?"

I take a bite of chocolate. "We saw it in a movie and thought it'd be awesome," I tell him.

Rosalie, meanwhile, is trying to hit him with the golf-club. "Go away, Emmett, this is girl time!"

He just laughs and twists the club out of her hands, resting it on his shoulder. "Uh huh. And these are _my_ golf clubs. You could have at least asked." He walks over to the edge of the roof to hit the ball? "Are you guys trying to hit Edward's house? That's pretty awesome."

He hits the ball and it flies farther than Rosalie and I got it to go. I hand him another one and he's just about to hit it when the window opens again and Jasper steps onto the roof.

He rolls his eyes at us and says, "Couldn't you have at least waiting for a thunderstorm? What if someone hears you?" I can see Alice behind him.

"You guys can come out here if you want," I say. Acting like it's my place to invite them out. Alice pushes by Jasper and gets out onto the roof. "Just be careful not to hit Edward and Bella's house," says Alice in her singsong voice. We three all smirk.

Rosalie and Emmett, meanwhile, are fighting over the club. It's actually pretty cute when they flirt like that. It doesn't bother me the way Kim and Jared do, for example. Or Bella and Edward. Or Emily and Sam. Maybe it's because they're my, um, friends. Or maybe it's because a few weeks after Jacob left, Rosalie told me about how she became a vampire, and I understood her bitterness for the first time. I have a lot of respect for her. We were talking about Bella and Edward one night after that and she said, "It must be nice, just having everything work out perfectly without ever having to work or have anything go wrong, ever." And for the first time, I understood where her feelings were coming from.

Emmett's still got the club. Jasper just sighs and picks up a chocolate. He throws it at Emmett's head and Emmett drops the club. Rosalie cheers.

"Okay, no fair. Jasper assaulted me with chocolate!" says Emmett.

Alice looks at him and says, "In some cultures that's considered foreplay."

I laugh especially hard because it's Alice who says it.

Rosalie turns to me and says, "Hey, want to go to the store and bu ludicrous cigars and sit in the BMW and smoke them and act really arrogant?"

"Oh my god, yes!"

"Uh, Rosalie, you can't really smoke," says her husband.

"Yes I can. Probably better than most people since I don't need to breathe."

We're heading toward the window when my phone starts vibrating in my pocket. I pull it out and see "The Dweeb" on the screen. "Ugh, it's my brother," I say, as I answer it.

"Leah? Come home right now. Sam's trying to reclaim our pack."

* * *

I get to the Rez as fast as I can. They're just barely inside the forest. All of them. Sam's there with his entire pack—Colin, Brady, Jared, Paul, and the seven others. Guys I don't know very well. Boys who hated me for how I was when I was in Sam's pack. Emily's there too, over to the side. Colin and Brady are in front of her—protecting her? They must be seventeen or eighteen by now. Damn. They're all arranged like a big circle. Or a horseshoe facing off against my pack.

Quil, Embry and Seth are on one side, standing close together. As soon as I get my clothes on, and not much clothes, either, since I ran over from the Cullens' in a hurry, I run into the circle, in front of my pack. "What the hell is going on, Sam?"

"Leah, come back to this pack. _Now_."

"Ha, let's think about that," I pause for a split second, "No!"

"Leah, you are not an Alpha. You cannot lead a pack."

I growl at him. "No, but I'm a beta. And this is Jacob's pack!"

Seth takes a step forward and says, "Yeah! And you can't claim what's Jacob's! We're loyal to _him_!"

Quil shifts uncomfortably. I wonder if it's because Claire is Emily's niece. Or if he just realizes that this is very quickly going to turn into a physical fight.

"Jacob Black is gone. He abandoned his pack and his responsibilities. I am the only Alpha here. You _must_ all come back into my pack. This is our Tribal Law. It is unnatural for Leah to be in charge of her own break-off pack."

What?! Okay, he asked for it. "Excuse me? Unnatural? What the hell, Sam? How is it _unnatural_?"

"For one thing, you shouldn't even be a wolf," snaps Sam. Oooh I bet he didn't mean for that to come out.

"Oh, why, because I'm a woman?" Maybe accusing my ex of sexism isn't a great idea, but I'm too pissed off to care.

"You're hardly a woman, Leah, or you wouldn't be able to phase," says Paul with a smirk. That jackass.

"Shut up, Paul." And then it's out of my mouth before I can stop it. I'm not thinking about Emily standing right there. "I think Sam can tell you just how much of a woman I am."

Sam makes a sort of hissing noise as he sucks in his breath too quickly. Embry and Seth look like they're about to swap punches with Jared and Paul. Sam and I are standing in the middle of the circle now, just a few feet apart.

"According to our law," says Sam, shaking, "your pack shouldn't exist. Leah, there is no way you can fight me," he adds, his voice low.

Okay, he has a point there. Sam's the biggest wolf here, and I'm the smallest. Well… I could knee him in the balls really hard, phase to wolf, and then run like hell. Yeah, that's my plan. I'm set.

"If the Council has a problem," says Seth, "tell them to call us in and we'll talk to them. We'll do what they tell us." My brother's actually pretty sensible.

"Seth, _I _am the Chief, by right of being the only Alpha. And I am telling you, come back to my pack."

"You aren't Chief!" shouts Quil. "_Jacob_ is! His great-granddad was our last Chief and Alpha! Yours was only Beta!"

Everyone takes a step forward, getting even closer to a full on fight. But Sam throws up his hands and his pack stops. I nod at mine and they stop as well. This is not looking good. God damn, why does Sam have to pull this authoritarian bullshit right now? What's it to him if we're not trying to kill the Cullens, if aren't trying to stop phasing, if we aren't in his stupid pack? Jesus, I thought I'd be the last person he'd want hearing his thoughts.

"Look around, Quil," says Sam calmly. Almost arrogantly. "Where is your precious leader? It sure as hell isn't Leah." He advances toward us. "Jacob Black isn't here. He's been gone for a year and a half. I'm claiming his pack."

"Actually, Sam," says a voice from over on the side of the gathering. "I'm right here. Now what the fuck are you doing to my pack?" And Jacob Black, in his human form and wearing cut-offs with more holes in them than actual fabric, emerges into the clearing.

* * *

AN:

Please review! Reviews are love! Reviews for "Endless Daylight" got this chapter up soo quickly (even after I thought I'd give myself a break to recover!) If you feel like Leah was out of character, maybe reading Endless Daylight will help.

"Red Sky at Morning" is a sailing term, from the rhyme "Red sky at night, sailor's delight. Red sky at morning, sailors take warning." A red sky in the morning means there will be a storm.

Lastly, just so everyone is clear on this, I'm not going to be able to update as often as I did for "Endless Daylight," because my term is starting in October… but I promise that I will update!

And remember to review!


	2. Chapter 2

AN: Dedicated to everyone who followed me from "Endless Daylight" over to this one! I love you all!

Just to clarify, yes, this is set about a year and a half after "Endless Daylight." Which is a long time. Sam was exaggerating it a bit; it's closer to a year than to a full 18 months. I needed time to pass so that Nessie could hurry up and grow up. She's about 5 now. That should also explain why Leah's so incredibly sexually frustrated.. And yes, Leah and Rosalie sit around watching "Across the Universe" and then imitate it. You _know_ they do.

PS: You may have noticed that, unlike "Endless Daylight," this one is **rated M**. Consider yourself warned. If that bothers you, skip the part where Jacob and Leah are alone together.

* * *

Nice timing, Jacob, but could you seriously have not gotten here five minutes earlier? Or five months?

He steps very carefully into the circle. Between me and Sam. That's good, because now I can use him as a shield after I execute the "kick Sam in the balls" move.

"Sam, what's going on?" Jacob asks, his voice lower than I've ever heard it. He sounds, well, dangerous (and kind of sexy, but I really need to not think about that right now. Not an appropriate time to be fantasizing, Leah).

Sam just laughs the sort of laugh that accompanies a sneer. Humorless. God, he must be really, really pissed. It's actually _almost_ impressive, since when we were dating I'd always get mad and yell at him and he'd just stay calm and look at me. This new anger must be an Alpha thing. Me, I'm always angry anyway. I guess that makes me an ideal Alpha. Except for the no-testosterone part. Actually, I'd probably be better at it than Sam. I wouldn't pull a ridiculous stunt like this in the forest.

Considering how upset everyone is, I suppose it's pretty shocking that no one has accidentally phased. Of course that would kick off World War III, Quileute Edition.

"Oh, so the wayward boy has returned," Sam says, dropping his voice so he sounds as dangerous as Jacob (less sexy though. Well, it's hard to be as sexy as Jake…No, bad Leah!) "Going to take responsibility for your pack? Going to stop breaking our laws?"

Jacob's jaw tightens. Sam doesn't seem to be intimidated _at all_, but the rest of his pack is eyeing Jake nervously. Maybe it's because he's the only person taller than Sam, and everyone knows Alphas are identified by their size. Supposedly, at least. I still think I could do it.

"As I was just explaining to Leah," Sam continues, "you and your pack _will_ come back. Jake, you've had your fun. We didn't kill Bella's child, and we didn't punish the Cullens for breaking the treaty. But you are clearly in no condition to lead your pack. Vanishing for a year and a half hardly speaks well of you," Sam's head is tilted back, like he's trying to look down his nose at Jacob. I guess that's exactly what he's trying to do. Seem taller than him. Must be some kind of weird Alpha domination thing.

And Jacob smirks. "Leah's a pretty capable woman, I'm sure she took care of everything while I was gone." He turns and smiles at me, an actual smile, not the smirk he's giving Sam. My knees get kinda wobbly. Can we just kick Sam's ass now and then go make out? "And anyway, I needed some time to think about my relationship with the Cullens. I thought you'd approve of that? Since, you know, I did imprint on one."

There's a hiss from the assembled wolves. No one here likes the idea of Jake with Nessie. To many of them, Jacob's imprinting on a half-vampire just proves that he's unfit to be an Alpha. I wouldn't be surprised if Seth and I are the only ones who support it.

Wait. No. What the _hell_ did I just say? I don't support it! It's wrong! What happened to me? God damn, Jacob better not have planned this. Leaving me in charge of looking after his pet Spawn so that I wouldn't completely hate her.

I will say this, though, it isn't her fault. I reserve the right to blame Bella, though.

"Oh, right, your relationship with the Cullens. Is that where you were before you so kindly joined us for this little werewolf discussion? Over with your leech friends? Tell me, Jacob, do you let them drink your blood?" Another hiss from those assembled. I'm tempted to shout that the vamps don't want our blood but somehow, I don't think that would help. "Honestly, Jacob, you care more about the Cold Ones than you do about your pack. Or our Tribe."

Another rumble goes through the wolves. I'm starting to realize just how obviously Sam's pack outnumbers us. And how much they don't support Jake. 12 to 5 are not good odds. The chances of me managing to kick all of them in the balls before escaping are pretty slim.

"Is Bella so important to you that you would defile yourself this way?" Sam continues. Oh, boy's on a roll. I should have stuck that lollipop into his eye when I had the chance.

"That's not true!" Oh god. It's my brother. My brother has entered the discussion again. "Jake is a great Alpha! And the Cullens are people, too! There's nothing wrong with not having baseless prejudices!"

Okay, I need to have a talk with Seth. Because he should know better than to think a speech like that would go over well with this crowd. And someone should tell him that those prejudices aren't really "baseless." Most bloodsuckers, do, in fact, kill people.

"Do you hear him?" Paul calls to the rest of the pack, indicating Seth. "He thinks the _vampires_ are people."

I've been quiet for too long. Haven't mocked Sam lately. "Sam, this has gone far enough," I say, dropping my own voice. What is this, my beta voice? It's the voice I used to use in our arguments, the ones I regretted so much after he left me for Emily ("maybe if I hadn't been such a bitch he would still love me.") Except that I am about five times the bitch now than I ever was when I with Sam. "Seriously. You can stop challenging Jake to his ridiculous male pissing contest, or whatever the hell it is, because you cannot honestly be contesting his right to be an Alpha. He's Ephraim's great-grandson."

"First of all, Leah, there is no such thing as "an" Alpha. There is _the_ Alpha. Secondly, of course you'd say that about this. This is serious wolf business, and you can't understand it because you think it's a _guy thing_. This is exactly why there aren't supposed to be female werewolves."

I snarl. Yes, an actual snarl. While in human form. Jacob puts his arm out and stops me from charging Sam. His fingertips touch my stomach and I feel like I've been shocked. I stop, so I guess it worked, him holding me back, but I swear to god, if we were alone right now, I'd be on him so fast…. What's going on with me? Why is him standing up to Sam so freaking _hot_ to me? This is too weird.

"I'd be careful what you say to Leah, Sam," Jacob growls. Sam flashes a humorless smile and opens his mouth to speak.

I don't know why _that's _what pisses Jake off, but it is. The smile. Because Jake's flying toward Sam and _boom_, two horse-sized wolves are on each other, one red, one black. Jacob tries to bite Sam's neck, but Sam wriggles away. They circle each other for about two seconds before the Sam wolf ooks over at Emily, who is standing frozen behind Colin and Brady. And then they're off, breaking through the circle and chasing each other into the forest. Sam's the faster runner, but Jake is right on his heels. It's terrifying. Or it would be, if I wasn't a werewolf too. If I wasn't completely used to horse-sized wolves running around.

Jared and Paul are the first to phase, and they barrel off after their Alpha. Seth and Embry growl and explode into a wolf form, tearing off after Jared and Paul, and trying to bite at Paul's legs. Ha, nice one, boys. Quil is next, after only a momentary pause. Sam's entire pack is phasing too, except for Colin and Brady, who can't decide what to do. They make eye contact and nod, and then Colin turns to Emily and says, "stay here" and two more wolves explode out of boys' bodies.

Emily is just staring at me, now. I'm the only one left. She takes a step toward where the boys disappeared but I snarl at her. "Colin is right. It's too dangerous for you," I tell her, and then I'm gone, too, off after the boys, the ruined shreds of my clothes falling to the forest floor. I can hear my cousin shouting "Leah!" after me, but it just makes me run faster.

* * *

I'm fast enough that I pass all of the boys on the way and am the first to get to where Jake and Sam are fighting. They are both bleeding, but it doesn't look too serious.

The others start to arrive, their thoughts giddy, thrilled that their Alpha has at long last returned to them. _Jake, yeah! Kick his ass! _That's Embry.

Jacob just snarls at Sam and thinks _Guys, this would be _so_ much easier if you'd shut the hell up. _His thoughts carry so much rage with them, too. I know he's not mad at us, but at Sam, but still, it's scary. Jacob's always been, well, a nice person.

_Hey, if we're annoying you, just think what the million other wolves must be doing to Sam right now_, thinks Seth, sending little happy waves over toward Jake.

Sam does look a bit distracted as he and Jake circle each other. I guess you can't command your pack to not think. Although if anyone would try it, Sam would.

Jake and Sam keep snapping at each other, but don't seem to be inflicting too much damage. God, they are huge!

_That's what she said, _thinks Embry.

_Shut up and let Jake get his throat,_ I fire back.

Sam seems to be limping a bit from where Jacob got his leg and when Jake charges forward to attack, Sam smacks his face with his paw, drawing some serious blood, and gets his teeth into Jake's neck. I'll give it to Sam, it was a pretty good fake.

But Jacob's bigger, so he throws his weight and Sam goes flying. Into a tree. Which breaks. Guess trees weren't made to withstand humongous wolves being thrown into them.

Sam rights himself and attacks instantly. But this time Jacob's ready and he pounces on Sam while Sam is till running forward. He knocks Sam back and stands over him, _his_ teeth now at Sam's neck. Sam whimpers.

Jacob lets out a pretty scary snarl, and I he's thinking _God damn Sam, leave my pack alone, don't you dare come near them, don't you dare come near her_.

Embry, Quil and Seth all think he must just be looking out for his beta. Sam of course can't hear his thoughts, but the snarl Jacob is giving him is pretty clear.

And then Emily appears. I snap my head around to look at her, and so do most of the wolves. Jacob's entire attention is focused on Sam though, and Sam's trying to right himself, but Jake's still holding him down, snarling. "Jacob, please," says Emily quietly. At last he turns his massive head toward where she's standing. "Please, he's my husband," she says.

There's a pause, and in one quick movement, Jake jumps off Sam. Sam stands up slowly, limping now in earnest. Both wolves are spotted with blood, their own and each other's.

_Leah_, Jacob's thoughts say in my mind, _You're going to want to go phase somewhere else, because there's about to be a lot of very naked boys_._ Everyone, we're having a meeting. My house?_

_Paul might be there, _Seth thinks_, We've been using our house as base while you've been gone. _

_Alright. Clearwater house. As soon as we find clothes. _

I turn and run toward La Push.

* * *

Thank god I keep some emergency clothes out in the forest. One bag's worth is by the Cullens' house, the idea being that if I stash my clothes at home and run over to the Cullens', there's stuff for me there. In a canvas bag tied to one of the trees. That way I don't have to bother tying clothes to my ankle, which is much less practical for me than for the boys. The point is, I manage to find one of my stashes before heading home. Granted, I live right by the woods, and I'm small enough (normal wolf size) that I can actually phase in the house. But it's hard getting in the door when you don't have thumbs to open it with. (Mom should really just get a wolf-sized doggie door for me and Seth).

Mom's not home. Must be at work. Or out with Charlie, picking out… what? Flowers? Horrible matching dresses for me and Bella? God only knows. I debate going into Seth's room and grabbing some of his shorts and throwing them into the forest for the boys, but I remember that Seth, Embry and Quil must have clothing stashes too. This will spare me from having to go into Seth's room which is a) messy and b) smells like most guys' of his age rooms. That is to say, gross.

Or Jacob could just show up at my house naked. That's a plan too. Probably my favorite plan.

The door bangs open and in runs Seth. He's practically glowing, whether it's because his beloved Jacob is home or because of the fight, I don't know. Quil and Embry show up next and go over to sit with Seth in the living room. "Yo, Leah, you have a first aid kit or something?" asks Embry. Why he doesn't ask Seth is beyond me.

I nod, "Yeah, why?"

"Jake's still bleeding. Wolf-induced wounds heal slower than regular ones," he says. Huh, I had forgotten that. Guess it's been awhile since there was a wolf vs. wolf fight, or even a wolf vs. vampire fight.

"Okay, yeah, I'll go get it," I go into the bathroom to find the damn kit. I hope to god that Jake's alright. He should be back by now.

I get the kit and head back into the hallway. Someone knocks on the door. None of the pack bother knocking anymore. Oh god it better not be freaking Sam or something—

Wait. There's someone else who might actually knock.

Jake. I open the door and stare at him. He stares at me. I can feel my breathing starting to speed up. What the hell is wrong with me that just looking at him, standing two feet from him, just barely being able to smell him, is making me this aroused? I feel tingly all over. And he's injured and bleeding too.

"I missed you," he breathes, eyes boring into me.

"Yeah… I missed you too," I say.

"Was I really gone a year and a half?" he hasn't looked away from my face yet.

"No. I mean, sort of. Closer to a year than a year and a half. But more than a year," I say, in a rush. God, is he really here? His cheek is bleeding and he has some gashes on his chest and legs. His shoulder looks pretty bad, too, where Sam bit him. I know he'll heal soon, but I should clean the wounds or something.

Or we could just have sex right here in the hallway.

"Leah…" he whispers my name and all the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. Oh _god_ I wish he wouldn't say my name like that (I wish he would, again and again, while he's thrusting into me. Oh shit, Leah, focus!) Fortunately before I fantasize any more Jacob starts talking again, "I didn't mean to be gone that long, I just…"

"Did you get it figured out?" I ask. (will not think about sex, will not).

He nods. "I think so. I need to see her, of course…" He seems like he's going to say more, to describe it to me, how he thinks about how it will work out with his imprint, which could be okay because talking about Nessie the Spawn will probably get me to stop wanting to sex him up….

But anyway, I can sort of guess what he's going to say about being gone. I always figured he was gone so long because he needed that much time to weaken the imprint or whatever. But instead, he swallows and says, "But I came here first…"

"Good thing, so you could deal with Sam," says Seth, behind me. We both startle. Shit. There are other people in the house.

Embry has come up behind my brother, leaning against the door from the kitchen. "Yo, Jake, you going to come in, or is Leah making you stay out there and bleed all over the porch?"

I jump back and let him in. "Um, Jacob, let me clean you up," I say awkwardly. I hope that Seth wasn't standing there long, that he didn't notice that I was looking at Jake like he was a cupcake… a sex cupcake.

Jacob walks past me and follows Seth and Embry into the kitchen. "I'll heal okay," says Jake as we all sit down in the living room. I have to move the Xbox controllers in order to sit down. Scott, meanwhile, has pranced into the room and is sitting between Seth and Embry, looking all happy. Huh. I guess there are 6 members. Not that Scott is going to come in at all handy in any future pack-on-pack fights. He must only weigh ten pounds.

Jake comes to sit beside me, even though Quil has to scoot out of the way. He looks at me expectantly and says, "I thought you were going to patch me up?"

"Oh. Right. Thought you'd heal okay on your own?" I say, trying to sound bitchy, to cover the fact that my hands are shaking.

"Leah, show some respect to Jacob!" says Seth, who is simultaneously president of the Leech fan club _and_ the Jacob fan club.

Jacob just gives me a really obnoxious grin. I get out the hydrogen peroxide and dab some on his shoulder. He hisses. "Shit, Leah, that hurts."

"I'm sorry, oh mighty Alpha."

He grits his teeth and turns his attention to the guys. Or at least pretends to. I hope he's still thinking about me. I try to touch him as much as I can while getting the blood off of him. But not enough for anyone else to notice. Jesus, I can _smell_ him.

"Okay, so what the hell is going on?" Jacob asks. "Why was he trying to steal my pack?"

"He's pissed about everything. That we're the pro-Cold One pack," I say, and Embry and Quil recoil. "Okay, I know we don't _love_ them, but we don't _all_ hate them, either. 'specially Seth and, well, you, Jacob."

"Oh, and you getting all friendly with the blonde one doesn't count?" Embry snaps.

"Whatever. Anyway, he's pissed that we phase so much, since 'the gifts of our ancestors are not meant to be used for personal enjoyment,' I say in my most Sam-esque voice. (aka obnoxious and arrogant and generally annoying). "He is worried that if none of us age, our secret will get out."

"Okay, that's ridiculous," Jake says.

"It sort of sucks that half the Rez doesn't know what's going on," says Seth, for once in his life saying something intelligent.

"Anyway, Jake, I was going to ask _you_ what was going on," says Embry "I mean, Leah's diplomatic skills were majorly sucking back there, but seriously, dude you went for his fucking throat!"

"I don't know," Jacob says, sighing. He throws his head back and shuts his eyes. "I just lost it. Shit, it was freaking scary too... He seems tired.

"Of course you fought him," mumbles Quil. When we all look at him, he straightens up and says, "My granddad said something like this would happen if, I mean when, you came back."

"What do you mean, 'if?'" asks Jake. I've gotten most of the blood and forest grime off; he should heal cleanly.

Quil looks embarrassed. "I heard that a lot of the Elders weren't sure about whether or not you'd come back… it's why I think Sam pulled this today. He convinced the Council that you'd abandoned your responsibilities…"

Jacob hisses, "I didn't abandon anything! I had to deal with this Nessie thing." Quil shifts and looks at the floor. "Quil, what's wrong?" Jake asks. Quil is looking even more uncomfortable.

"Nothing, Jake. I'm glad you're back. Just in time, too."

"Quil?" he presses. Quil shakes his head so Jake says again, "seriously, what is it?"

Finally Quil shrugs and says, "I just wouldn't have been able to leave Claire like that. When Leah told us, I didn't really believe it."

"It wasn't easy. It hurt like hell."

Quil just looks away. Finally he says, "Then why'd you do it?" he asks, seeming genuinely interested. Like Jake did the impossible. I guess he did, though.

"I had to. For both of us."

"Maybe Nessie wanted him to go," says Seth. "Maybe he could only leave because she wanted him to?" I have to give it to Seth; he's pretty good about giving people the benefit of the doubt. Especially his Dear Jacob the Great One.

"Anyway, Quil, I don't think Nessie and I are like you and Claire," Jake says quietly.

"Oh man, Jake, I am so glad you're back!' says The Dweeb. "That was so awesome when you threw Sam into the tree!"

"Shit, yeah," Embry says.

"About that, Quil, you were going to tell me what your grandfather said?" prompts Jacob.

"Oh, yeah, he said that Levi Uley used to argue with Ephraim sometimes, and Ephraim would like, smack him down or whatever. Actually, he said that Ephraim would pin Levi until he'd stop struggling."

"Sounds familiar," says Embry.

"But I thought betas couldn't argue with Alphas?" Seth says.

Jacob just rolls his eyes, "Oh man Seth, haven't you been paying attention? Your sister argues with me _all the time_."

"Shut up, I do not," I say.

"You just did,"

"Don't make me pour more hydrogen peroxide on you."

"Oh, I'm really scared."

"Um…." Embry is looking from me to Jake and back.

"So anyway, my granddad said that _when_," nice recovery, Quil, "you came back, there'd probably be a fight between you and Sam eventually. He said he's surprised it hadn't happened before, after the packs split."

"That's because we stayed out of each other's way and tried not to be in the same room at the same time," says Jacob. "I can't explain it. Something about him just really, really pisses me off."

This, to me, sounds like more of this ridiculous male testosterone Alpha "blah blah look at us, we're so manly" crap, but I probably shouldn't say anything because I'm outnumbered here. Oh wait, I'm always outnumbered. Because I'm the only female wolf. But actually, I can't really blame Jacob for wanting to rip out Sam's throat. Sam _is_ kind of a jerk.

"You weren't actually going to hurt him though, were you?" asks Seth quietly.

"Did you not hear what I said about 'going for the throat'?" Embry demands.

Jacob just sighs. "I don't know. If Emily hadn't come—"

"Yeah, can I just say, what the hell was Sam doing, letting his pregnant wife wander around with a bunch of wolves?" says Quil, "Seriously, I'd never let Claire any of us."

"Dude, shut the hell up about Claire already," Embry says. "You're worse than Jake in his Bella phase."

I try not to growl or anything. _Bella_….ugh.

"Emily's pregnant? Ah. I thought maybe she was just getting chubby," says Jacob. I smack him. Everyone else ignores him.

"Or worse than Leah in her Sam phase," snaps Quil. "Oh wait, that's still going on!"

"Yes, I am so madly in love with Sam, Quil," I say, "that's why I was throwing myself between him and Jake today. Oh wait, no I wasn't! _And_ I almost killed him with a grape sucker the other day." Everyone just stares at me and deposits this information into the "things Leah says that we don't understand" file.

"Plus the Romanian vampire threesome comment," Embry adds, smiling. "Leah, I told you not to bait him."

"Holy shit," Jacob says, "are you two actually getting along?"

"Yeah, usually they just call each other 'bitch' and 'bastard' over and over and over again. It's horrible," says Seth.

"Less horrible than listening to you two play Halo all freaking day, every day."

"Shut up, Leah! We run patrols, too!" I am pretty sure The Dweeb just says this for Jacob's benefit. Because he smiles hopefully at Jake as he says it.

"Can I just say, Jake, what the hell?" I begin. He looks at me. I stopped cleaning his wounds awhile ago and now he's leaning back on his hands. My own hands are out behind me, and they're pretty close to his. Close enough that every few seconds one of our fingers twitches. God I wish I could touch him.

And yes, we have furniture. I don't know why we're all on the floor.

"Were you like, standing behind a tree waiting for the perfect time to jump out? Seriously? Because if I had known you weren't in Canada but were instead living in a bush, I would have gone out and dragged your sorry ass home a long time ago!" I say, laughing.

"She does have a point," says Seth. "For once."

"Shut up, Dweeb."

"No. I got back right before then," Jake says, "I mean, it took me a second to phase and put on pants. I didn't think walking out naked would be good."

Yes, actually it would.

Someone, meanwhile, is knocking on the door. "Who the hell is that?" asks Quil.

"I don't know, why don't one of you useless boys go and answer it?" I say. Seth gets up and bounds through the kitchen to the hallway. I hear him saying hi to someone, but he sounds strained.

"Who is it?" I call. He appears seconds later with Jared behind him. Great. Just what this day needs.

"What are you, Sam's errand bitch?" snaps Embry. I laugh. Jacob's lips almost twitch into a smile. I guess he's trying to be professional and Alphaey.

"Actually, I'm Sam's _beta_," Jared says. "He gave me a message to give to you."

"We gathered that," says Quil. Usually he's the nicest to the other pack. He must be emboldened by having his Alpha home.

Jacob's on his feet. He's about 6'8 now, and Jared's only like 6'4 or 6'5. I wonder if Jared is intimidated. "Sam wanted me to tell you that he and you should have a meeting with the Tribal Elders."

Jake shrugs, "Yeah, I'd be happy to go to the Council. When?"

"Next week."

"Fine."

Jared just sort of stands there awkwardly before finally saying, "Okay, I'll just be leaving then."

"I think that's a good idea," says Jacob. Seth starts to walk Jared to the door, and Jacob follows, and the rest of us follow after him. As soon as Jared's gone, he turns to us all and says, "I should probably go see my dad. Um."

"Jake, promise me you'll talk to my granddad before you meet with the Elders?" says Quil. I wonder why it's so important. Quil Senior is on the Council, so he'll be there anyway. But Jacob agrees. Quil moves toward the door and says, "It's nice having you back. I sort of have to go see Claire… her elementary school is doing an art show and I promised her I'd go look at her picture…"

"Of course," says Jake. They do that funny awkward thing guys do when they are trying to hug. Quil leaves and Jacob turns to Embry and Seth. "You guys have plans?" Does Jake think he's being subtle?

"Yeah, we'll probably just play Halo," says Seth.

"Oh."

"Is that not okay? If you want, we can run patrols!" Seth asks. I can almost hear Jacob's thoughts. How immoral is it to send a poor kid like Seth on a patrol just so you can get his big sister alone?

Finally he says, "No, that's okay. There's no reason. But, um…."

"Jake, you should totally come!" Seth enthuses, "Seriously! Mom's staying over in Seattle tonight getting stuff for the wedding, so we were going to have an all-night Halo party!"

Oh. That's where Mom is. I like how much attention I pay to things around me.

"Wedding?" Jake asks.

"Yeah, our mom is marrying Charlie," I say. Jacob's eyebrows shoot up.

"Really? Damn," he says. I decide not to mention the Bella/Leah matching dresses scheme. Too awkward, given his history with her. Ew, my future stepsister and I made out with the same guy. That's gross. "Anyway, thanks guys, but I really don't like Halo," he finishes. "So you guys are going to be here all night?"

What the hell? How do Embry and Seth not know what he's trying to ask? How do they not notice that we are seconds away from jumping each other?

"We were actually thinking of going to my place for a bit," says Embry. "Since my house has food, and we already ate everything Sue left for us."

"Oh yeah, that's right," Seth says.

"That's a great idea!" I say, too loudly. Everyone flinches. "Seriously! You should go to Embry's! Then I can do all of those at-home spa treatments Alice gave me!"

"Leah, you are such a freak," says my stupid brother.

"Yes. And then I am going to listen to Shania Twain's 'Man, I Feel Like a Woman,'" I add.

Embry tries to keep from laughing. "There's an obvious comment I could make here about your non-femininity, but I won't."

"Dude, do you wanna just go you your house now so my lame sister doesn't bother us?" Seth asks. Yes, Seth. This is a good plan. A very good plan. I almost cackle.

"Okay, well, I'm going to go see Billy. See you all later," Jacob says, leaving. What the hell? I thought I was getting some? I guess it _is_ important that he see his dad, but still.

Seth and Embry head into the living room to get the Xbox and their game or whatever. I go to my room and lay down on the bed. And I was soooo close, too.

* * *

I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I know, it's two hours later and someone is pounding on my door. I run to open it. It's Jacob. Shirtless. Dripping wet from the rain.

"Hi…" I breathe.

"Going to let me in, this time?"

"Yes," I say, moving just barely to the side. He brushes against me as he comes in.

"God, I forgot how good you smelled," he says softly. Huskily. We're so close that we're almost touching.

"Jacob," I say his name with desire, and relief—relief that he's finally home, relief that he came here first, instead of to Nessie, and relief that he is here now.

And then he's kissing me, pressing me against the closed door and standing between my legs. I bend one knee and brace my foot against the door, trying to give him more space, trying to get us even closer together. I tug on his hair and he kisses me harder. His hand is on my face, caressing it, but then he reaches down and grabs my hips and pulls me up higher so he can kiss me more easily. Keeping me pinned against the door with his body. My legs are dangling—a nice feeling for a girl as tall as I am.

And Sam sure as hell never kissed me this way.

I'm melting in his arms. God I'm aroused. There are lots of things Jacob and I should probably be saying to each other right now, about what he figured out in Canada, hell, even about what happened today. But right now all I want to do is _finally_ have him…

"Jake…" I pant. "My room…." And that's all I can get out because he's kissing my mouth again, and my neck, and oh god the tops of my breasts above my tank top. I wrap both legs around his waist and he carries me down the hall to my bedroom. The lights are off, but there's light coming in the window. Is the moon up already? Wow. I guess when werewolves have sex then the moon is sort of necessary.

"In a hurry, Leah?" he asks, smiling at me.

"Sorry. It's just… been a really, really long time…."

He laughs and sets me down on the floor. "So you're okay with me being here?"

I'd be more okay if you were naked and on top of me Jacob Black, I think. But instead I say, "Did you get it figured out?"

"Yeah…."

"So when you make love to me, it's going to be you, and not just the parts of you Nessie hasn't claimed?" I ask, staring at him.

He blushes and nods. "Can I?"

"Can you what?"

"Make love to you…" his blush deepens. It's really, really cute. "I mean, no pressure. We can go slow."

Okay, fuck going slow. I haven't been dreaming about screwing him for freakin' _months_ for him to waltz into my room and play that stupidass "going slow" card.

So I take off my shirt and let it fall to the floor, my necklace going with it. Jacob's mouth drops open. "Oh god you're hot," he says in a rush and then the next thing I know I'm on the bed underneath him. Well, this is certainly progressing well.

His hands find my breasts almost immediately and he's back to kissing my neck. He seems to like that. I arch my back up and moan. I wish he'd take off my bra, my nipples are hard and need attention. If he doesn't do it soon I am going to tell him. But no, he's pushing down my bra and god his massive hands are cupping my breasts and I'm moaning and whimpering and straining up off the bed.

He just takes one hand and pushes me back down. "Jake, please, don't tease me," I say as I squirm under him.

"You're teasing me too, pressing against me like that," he smirks down at me. The mark on his cheek is almost healed, and his shoulder is passable but still pretty raw. Wow, he was hurt pretty badly.

I put my hand on his neck and pull myself up to him, licking his mouth. His eyes open wider. "God, Leah… I want you…." And his thumb rubs against my nipple as he says this and I gasp.

And then he's covering my face with kisses, and my neck, and collar bone, and god, lower, on my breasts and then his mouth and tongue find my nipple and I'm in heaven. One hand is tangled in his hair and the other is on his back, digging my nails into his skin.

"Jacob…." I pant, "I dreamt about this…."

He stops and looks up at me. "Really?"

I nod. He's between my legs, but honestly, this would be better if he were up higher. I can feel his arousal pressing against my leg, though, and it's driving me insane.

"Yeah, but in my dream we were naked," I say.

"Is that a hint?"

"I was trying to be subtle."

And then his hands are on the waistband of his pants and I have a very, very naked Jacob in my room. Oh god. I might actually hyperventilate.

"Your mouth is open," he says, smirking. Damn the male ego! But I forget to yell at him because he reaches his hand under me and tugs at my bra clasp. Nothing happens. I giggle.

"Oh my god, Jacob, you are such a guy," and then I reach around and undo the clasp. It's finally off.

He bites his lip. "I feel like it shouldn't be that hard, getting those things undone…" he turns his attention to my jeans. I help him pull them off of me.

Holy shit. I'm almost naked in my room with Jacob. If this gets dragged out any longer, I will explode from sexual tension and unfulfilled lust. And not explode in an orgasmic way, but a dead way. And then I will be dead and unable to come ever again and that will suck.

Jake, meanwhile, is staring at my panties. He makes a little whimpering noise. "Leah…." And then he puts his fingers under the waistband and pulls them off me. And stares at me. "You…."

"Jacob, you've seen me naked before," I remind him.

"Yeah, okay, phasing doesn't count. You…. Oh god….." He's running his fingertips up and down my body and I don't know how much I can take. I was already soaked through my panties, and now he's teasing me more? What the hell? Why can't he just fuck me? But actually, it's kind of nice. I relax my muscles and close my eyes, enjoying it.

He leans down next to me and kisses me softly. "Leah, you are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen,"

"Uh huh. Sure. You _have_ been up in Canada chillin' with the mooses."

"No, I mean it." He bites his lip and blushes. "I can't believe I'm here with you."

I look at him and put my hand on his cheek. "You know, I almost tried to do this with you that day when you were napping at the Cullens'.

"I dreamed about doing this with you that night we were sleeping at the Cullens," he answers, his voice as husky as I've ever heard it.

"You'll have to tell me about it sometime," I say, as his hand trails along my stomach. And then lower. And…oh. Hello.

"Leah…" he almost growls. I spread my legs a bit because _oh does that feel nice_. My eyes roll back in my head and I just sort of pant. "Leah, you're _wet_."

"Mmmm."

"I mean, damn."

"Mmmm. I've been…. wanting this, all day….. ever since you….. appeared." I bite my hand to keep from moaning too loudly. His other hand grabs my mine and pulls it down to my side.

"Don't. I want to hear you moan," he says hoarsely. He's panting too, and I wonder how long he can take this. Actually, I don't know if _I _can take this any longer. I spread my legs even more so Jake gets the hint and then I tighten my muscles around his fingers. His eyes get big. "Wow…I…wow…."

I reach down and grab his wrist. "You want me to stop?" he asks as I keep squeezing him. I hope to god he's imagining what it's going to be like when he's inside me.

I shake my head. "No, I just wanted to tell you something. I meant what I said when I joined your pack. You're worth following." I look up at him and he trembles. That's my version of romantic sweet-talk. But it seems to be enough.

I arch up and kiss him again, pulling him down on top of me. I put my lips against his ear, "Jacob, I want you…" I nibble his ear and he moans and presses his hardness against my thigh. _God_. "I want…" I'm almost blushing to say this, but I'm so far gone with lust that I don't care. And it's true. "Jacob, I want to feel you inside me."

He makes a little choking noise in the back of his throat. "Wait," he says and then rolls off of me. What the hell? What is he doing? Not okay. He grabs his jeans and fishes in his back pocket until he produces, wait, a condom? What?

"Have you seriously been carrying that around with you?" I ask.

"I got it when I was at home," he shrugs. "I mean, not to be presumptuous…." He's clearly embarrassed that he told me that, but whatever. We did sort of say that as soon as he got back from Canada we were going to have sex. "Emmett put a note in the box about how everyone thought Edward was infertile and," he shrugs again, "I don't know. You're not even really infertile, are you?"

Okay, we should be screwing right now, not talking about my fertility. But no, he keeps talking, "I mean, you could still have an egg lurking around up there from before you phased."

"You're worried that I have an egg _lurking_?" I ask.

"Did I upset you?"

I smile at him. "No, it's actually really sweet." And then I put one of my feet on his chest and he moans and comes back over to me.

We're kissing again, and I'm trembling with anticipation. He, meanwhile, seems to be trembling with nervousness. He pulls away from my mouth and says, "Just so we're clear on this, I have no idea what I'm doing."

"It's not that difficult, Jacob, Your instincts will take over," I say, rubbing my body against his. I brush his arousal with my fingertips and he makes that little noise again.

He blushes and looks down to watch me touch him. "Yeah, I know, but girls are, you know, complicated."

"You're doing a very good job so far," I whisper. And then he's inside me and I can't think about anything.

* * *

AN:

Thank you to everyone who reviewed Chapter One! And thank you to everyone who is going to **review **Chapter Two (possible hint….). I wasn't joking about the whole "reviews make me update" thing. I was definitely going to take some time off after "ED" but then Chapter One happened. Actually, I was doing outlines of "Red Sky" while I was supposed to be writing "ED" so I'm glad to be on this one at last.

I am, however, going to be very, very busy soon, (flying to the UK tonight!) so updates will be sparser, but they will still happen! I promise! The good news is that because of the outlines you can rest assured that I won't forget where this is going and accidentally write a Jacob/Nessie fic.


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last two chapters! I got this puppy (haha) out as soon as I could!

* * *

I'm warm, warmer than normal. My alarm clock goes off but before I can throw a pillow at it, someone's yanking out of its socket.

"Like you couldn't have turned that thing off last night," mumbles Jacob. Jacob! Oh, right. Oh. _Oh_. He's giving me this look now, this sweet yet sleepy yet annoyed yet amused look. I blush.

"You're blushing because of your alarm clock?" he asks. His voice is a low rumble. It seems deeper than before he went to Canada, but maybe it's just my imagination. But he sounds waaaay sleepier than yesterday. Of course, yesterday he was only angry and later, well…

"I'm blushing because we're in bed together, moron," I say. I'm very conscious of the sheet covering my body. I intend to keep in there. The room is suddenly very bright (albeit from green light coming in through the trees) in a way that it wasn't last night and I'm feeling, well, shy.

And, um, I've never actually slept with anyone before. Except for that time Jacob and I fell asleep together at the Cullens' house. Sam and I never _slept_ slept together… even after prom, he took me home. I thought at the time he was trying to save me from having to explain to my parents that I was having sex. (Would they have cared? I mean, do parents object when their daughters go to bed with _Sam Uley_, the 'Greatest Thing to Happen to La Push in Years'?) Now I wonder if he didn't want to ruin his _own_ reputation. Which is stupid, anyway, because it was his idea.

"Of course we're in bed," Jacob is saying, playing with my hair. But to his credit, he's blushing as well. He pushes himself up with one arm and kisses me. It's sweet. I giggle.

And then he laughs at me. Because apparently me giggling is funny to him. He is still smirking when he says, "So I can honestly say that was the best sex of my life." I am tempted to be a smartass ask him which round, but instead I roll my eyes and kick him. And then he grabs my forearm. And I try to kick him again under the sheet and he's pinned me. Um.

"Hi," he says.

"Hi."

At no point last night did I consider how awkward this might be today. Wasn't thinking much of anything.

"You hungry?" he asks. I just sort of look at him and think about all the places his body is touching mine. "Becaus we could go out to the kitchen or something…" and then his voice trails off and he starts kissing my neck. So what does he want? Food? Not food?

"How many condoms did you _bring_?" I ask, because I'm genuinely curious.

Jake stops kissing me and shrugs. "A lot. I mean, not to be, you know…"

"Presumptuous?"

"Yeah. But I thought it'd be horrible if I had to raid Seth's stash or whatever."

I push him off me and glare at him. "Jacob, my brother _does not_ have a stash!"

Jacob just laughs and smirks at me. "That you know of."

"No, he doesn't. Seth's very innocent!"

Again, a shrug. "Okay."

"You didn't—the leeches had to hook you up."

"Well…" he's clearly thinking of a comeback. But there won't be one. Because I have clearly won. "….Well, I imprinted on Nessie. And so no one was going to encourage me with that. But _Seth_ hasn't imprinted on anyone. So he could be getting with loads of girls…" and then he starts laughing and I join in. Poor Seth though. Being a werewolf sort of takes the place to ever having a real social life. Until he either imprints or stops phasing. And we can't stop phasing until the Cullens' are gone. And the Cullens don't want to leave as long as Jacob is here, because of Nessie, so…

Jake stops laughing suddenly, and just kind of looks at me. "Leah, can I ask you something?"

I bite my lip and nod. What is it? I wonder if he wants to ask about Sam? Ew, I hope not. I don't want to ruin my after-sex morning with Jacob by talking about Sam.

"Ok, um, this is none of my business," he says. Definitely about Sam. "And you can slap me or whatever, and honestly, _I don't care_, because it's not like when I went to Canada I expected you to just sit around and wait for me, I am not that arrogant, but…" he takes a deep breath, "Um, I just want to know, did something happen between you and Embry?"

My mouth drops open and I look at him. _Embry?_

"'Cause, it's fine, I just want to know, of course you don't have to tell me, but if you guys have something going on, then I should probably know, because now _we _have something going on. But if it was like a one-time hookup thing, I get that too, um…"

"Jacob," I say "Nothing happened or is going to happen between me and Embry."

He looks relieved. "But, you know, I'm not trying to…own you or whatever."

I lean over and kiss his cheek. "Honestly."

"He was looking at you," Jacob says, "well, probably the same way that I look at you."

"Yeah, he's been doing that a lot. I was going to have a talk wit him."

"He'll probably stop as soon as everyone knows about you and me," he says. There's an awkward pause and finally he says, his voice hopeful, "So are we dating?"

"I…think so?" I say. I hadn't really gotten that far. The Leah Plan: Step on: Jacob comes home. Step two: have sex with Jacob. Step three: figure out step three.

"That's what I told Nessie," he says, stretching his arms.

"What?"

"Oh, yeah, in my letter. I told her that I thought I might be in—might have feelings for you and that when I came back, I might be dating you."

"You wrote that in your letter?" I ask, and he nods.

"She didn't show you?"

"No. She didn't show her mother, either. They sort of had a fight about it."

"That's funny," he says, "Because I told Bella almost the exact same thing. That I will always love Nessie, and she will always be very, very important to me, and that I will always protect her, but that I have very different feelings for you...that my feelings for Nessie are purer, simpler…Not that you are complex, but that Nessie is just her own little thing… Like Nessie is a little…. ball or fairy or something… that I need to protect and love and honor. But I'm not attracted to her the way I was to Bella and the way I am to you."

"Ew," I say, "don't remind me of your Bella Phase." I _know_ about Bella, of course, but knowing and thinking about are two different things. And what the hell does 'ball or fairy' mean? So I ask him.

"You know, like this little thing floating there. You protect it but don't really interact? It's like…she's sort of a deity or something. I don't know how to put words to it. Anyway, about Bella…." He puts his arm over my shoulders and looks at me.

"Leah, it's not the same, don't worry. For one thing, I have a lot more respect for you. I know that sounds horrible to her, but I didn't worry about you being alright when I was in Canada… and also, you can be kind of scary in a way…"

I'd hit him, if he weren't grinning at me.

"So are you my girlfriend?" he asks again. We've gone from dating to girlfriend status in this conversation pretty quickly. Girlfriend? That's kind of a big deal. Although, sex is also a big deal.

"Yeah, okay," I say.

"Don't sound enthusiastic about it or anything."

"It's just that this means now we have to start telling people," I tell him. He shrugs.

"I already told the Cullens. Before I left, and in the letters." Yes, Jacob, because The Cullens are the only people who might care that we're together.

"What exactly did you and Edward talk about in your little man to man conversation?" I ask. I've been genuinely curious for months. Worse, Edward has known I've been curious and hasn't told me. The fluffy-haired bastard.

"Oh, that. Well, I told him that what I did with you wasn't any of his business. And he said he couldn't help 'overhearing.' I said that was his problem. I said that I had feelings for you, and it wasn't just a sex thing. And that this doesn't change how I feel about Nessie. I told him a thousand times probably that I love Nessie, and he should be glad it's as a sister…And then I told him never to accuse me of being a pervert for thinking about your breasts," he smiles at me, embarrassedly, before continuing, "because he's the one who tried to get me to impregnate his wife and I never told Bella about that."

I shudder, remembering when I'd heard that through Jake's thoughts afterward. All the wolves were…disturbed, to say the least. "Bella still doesn't know?"

"Nope. I mean, would _you_ tell her?" he asks me.

"Of course not. And if my husband ever made that offer to someone…" I make a pair of scissors with my hand and Jacob shudders.

"She's alright then?" he asks.

"Bella? Yeah, she's in her own little 7th heaven."

"No, I mean Nessie," he says, laying back on my bed and staring up at the ceiling. My bed is really, really not big enough for both of us. Well, I don't think there are many beds that can fit Jacob. I roll over and press my body against his side. He lets me use one of his biceps as a pillow. Mmmm. What were we talking about? Oh, right.

"Yeah. She is still pretty confused, but I think Rosalie and I have got her convinced that _everyone_ is confused about themselves. Well, except Bella."

Jacob barks out a laugh, "Which is ironic, because she used to be one of the most confused people ever."

That's the problem with Bella. Well, one of the problems. Now that she's a Cullen, she's enjoying her own piece of perfect eternity. "That Nessie is changing so much doesn't really worry her—I think she's too busy thinking about how things will be in a few years when Nessie is physically grown or whatever."

"But Nessie is already really, really smart."

"Yeah. But she's getting better. By better I mean, well, I wouldn't say normal. She is talking more with her voice. She goes shopping with them in Port Angeles and Seattle. And sometimes to movies, too. They are trying to give her a normal life."

"Leah…" he murmurs, and pulls me against his chest. I think he's smelling my hair. "I'm sorry I left you in charge of looking after her."

"It's fine. She's….interesting."

"How old is she now? Five?" Yeah, and she's already more mature than her mother. Which is funny, in its own way, because Alice once told me Bella mothered her own mother. At this rate, Nessie's daughter is going to be born with knitting and spectacles or something.

I nod against him. "But she looks like she's in middle school. Somewhere in the seventh to ninth grade. She's too pretty to really be that age, like how Edward doesn't look seventeen, because most seventeen year old are kind of gangly or awkward or whatever. She wants to go to school."

He raises his eyebrows at that. "Are they going to let her?"

"I don't know. They don't know. It's been the topic of discussion of late. Anyway, she _is_ growing up. She got her period."

Jacob almost chokes to death on that one. "Really?" he squeaks.

I nod. "Yeah, a while ago. And guess what? She told me and not her mom. I guess Bella never got around to talking to her about it, since she's, you know, five."

"I bet that was an awkward conversation," he says.

"I guess. Mostly I just had to convince her she wasn't dying or anything. I told her it meant she was normal. _Ha_."

"I think your mom had that talk with my sisters after my mom died," says Jacob, a bit more quietly.

I didn't know that, but it's probably true. My parents and his parents were always really close. But I can't start thinking about that, or I will remember being a little kid trying to get Rachel and Rebecca to think I was cool while simultaneously ignoring their annoying little brother.

Who just happens to be a sex god. You see? Awkward.

I change the subject back to Nessie. "You know how she used to always call me 'Leah Clearwater'? Well, after that, she started calling me 'Aunt Leah.'"

"Huh," he says. "So she can have children?" Jake asks, still clearly lost in thought. The possibility that Nessie is can have children has given us all a lot to think about.

"We don't know. Carlisle says that even though she's menstruating, it doesn't mean she has viable eggs." And then I tell him about Carlisle trying to get Nahuel's sister's body.

"That's….disgusting."

"Oh, and there was something else important, too," I say. "As soon as you left, Alice started to get clearer and clearer visions of Nessie."

He looks shocked. "Really? I thought that Nessie had the same number of chromosomes as us?"

"Yeah, but we don't know if it's because of chromosomes that make it so Alice can't see us. It seems more likely that she can't see for other reasons. And Nessie is half-human, half-vampire, both of which Alice _can_ see."

"So what does it mean?" he asks.

"No one knows. But Rosalie and I think it means that you aren't influencing her future." He looks worried, so I continue, "it doesn't mean you are out of her life. It's just like how Alice could see Bella jump off of the cliff but not her get rescued by you. Maybe your actions aren't as important to determining the outcome of Nessie's life right now? For one thing, you were gone. For another, Alice got a sort of flash of the Nahuel thing before you left, remember?"

This is the theory that makes the most sense to me. It might just be wishful thinking. But of course Alice wouldn't have seen Nessie when she was first born—Bella was planning on sending Nessie into hiding with Jake.

Jacob, meanwhile, is staring up at my ceiling. Okay, so talking about Bella and Nessie while we are in bed together is pretty much the pinnacle of awkward and unsexy. It's just as bad as talking about Sam. I need to fix this. I run my hand down his chest and it seems to bring him out of his thoughts. "Hi, Jake," I whisper. He grins at starts kissing me.

We're contemplating round, what, four? (depends on whose tally you go by—mine or his. Mine is ahead) when we hear someone call my name. Someone being Seth, the Killer of Romance.

"Shit, I should so not be here right now," Jake says.

"Just…put your clothes on or something," I whisper back. I, meanwhile, roll out of bed and grab my panties. Jacob gasps at seeing me naked again.

As soon as I've thrown clothes on, I sneak out of the door (can't open it too wide or Seth might notice Jacob), leaving Jake to find his clothes. I need to see how easily I can get rid of Seth.

Oh god, he's brought Embry with him.

"Hi, Leah," says Embry. I just smile awkwardly.

"We stayed out all night at Embry's," says Seth. By the way, I'm really, really grateful for that. I just don't want them to know why. Telling them we're dating is going to be hard enough without saying Jake just spent hours making love to me.

"Ooooh, does this mean you'll make us breakfast?" asks Embry. Jacob, I hope to god, has just climbed out of the window in my room. Wait, that window is kind of small. Jacob is large. Shit. Maybe if I can get Seth and Embry to leave?

I'm contemplating back-up plans when Jacob swaggers out of my room. He's even put his shirt on.

"Hey, guys."

"Hi, Jake!" says Seth happily. "Oh man, I didn't know you were over here so early! Leah, are you going to make Jake breakfast? If you're making him some, can you please feed me? Please? Mom didn't leave enough food. Anyway, Jake, did you guys have lots of pack stuff to talk about? Did you figure out what to do about Sam? Oh, I guess I should clean up the living room and stuff so you guys can talk in there so you don't have to talk in my sister's gross room." Finishing this little speech, Dweeb sits down at the counter and looks at me the same way Scott does when he wants food. Scott, meanwhile, is sulking in the corner. Must be mad that he couldn't sleep in my room last night since Jacob took his place.

Embry is just looking from me to Jacob with a somewhat greater understanding that Seth. (Not a hard achievement. There are boxes of hair that can accomplish this.)

"Yeah, right, pack business. Okay, well, then, I'll just be off!" says Jake, heading for the front door.

"What about breakfast? Don't you want food?" asks Seth, fearing that if the Alpha's gone, no one is getting fed.

Jacob is about halfway to the front door when Embry says, "Jake, did you sleep with Leah?"

He stops walking. There's a pause and then he comes back into the kitchen. Seth is sitting there with his mouth open (thank god I haven't given him any food to put in it yet).

"….Yes." Jacob says at last. Embry narrows his eyes while Seth makes little strangling noises.

"What?" my brother finally asks, looking from me to Jake.

"That's not fair, Jacob," says Embry, advancing on him. "First of all, you can't horde women like that."

"Wait, what?" asks Jake.

"You're imprinted. You can't _also_ be with Leah. It's wrong. Being Alpha doesn't give you…hording privileges or whatever."

"With my sister?" Seth asks, sounding disgusted. "Ew! She's so….."

"Jacob, you can't. You can't hurt Leah like this," Embry is saying, while Seth continues to look appalled. "You're going to be just like Sam." I'm a little surprised that Embry is standing up for me, albeit in a really twisted, unhelpful-to-my-sexlife way.

"No, I won't," Jacob insists. "This is different. I l—I really really like Leah."

"Until Nessie grows up," Embry retorts.

"No, not until Nessie grows up. Why the hell did you think I went to Canada?"

"Oh, right, I should have known you only run off when you have _woman trouble_."

"Ew, Jake," Seth cuts in, "she's my _sister_."

"Yeah, Seth, and I'm sorry about that. But I really like her," he says.

"Really?" Embry asks. Jacob nods. "This isn't just about you being horny?"

"No. It's not."

"Because it's not fair to Leah…"

"Embry, I started it," I tell him. Jacob gives me a look as if to say that that's not entirely true, but I ignore it. "It's not Jake's fault."

"Yeah, well, you probably can't help it, since he's the Alpha. He probably, like, smells like sex to female werewolves or something," says Embry.

Yes, that's exactly right. That is exactly what Jacob smells like. But instead I say, "Embry, really. Jacob and I talked about this before he went to Canada. And I don't need anyone's protection."

Embry just sighs. "Fine. But if he is mean to you I will kick his ass."

"You can try, but you'd fail," Jacob says smugly. Suddenly things seem okay between them.

I will never understand men.

Seth is still giving me a look. Like I've tainted his Great One with my womanness. "Seth?" says Jacob. "Your sister is a great girl. I will be good to her. I get it. When Rebecca got married, well, I still kinda don't like her husband. And the whole Paul and Rachel thing is massively gross, but I promise, I will be a good boyfriend to Leah, okay?"

Seth finally shrugs and says, "I guess it is better than Paul. Or Sam."

"Why do you hate Sam?" Embry asks. I thought everyone loved him.

"He wasn't very nice to Leah when we joined the pack."

And before they can start whining again for food, Jacob and I head outside. We've got to get over to the Cullens'. Jacob needs to talk to Nessie. And I need to talk to Rosalie.

* * *

When we walk into the front room, all the leeches are there. Alice runs upstairs, to get Dr. Dracula, I wonder? Esme goes to the kitchen, and I am curious if Jacob is going to get fed after all. The other leeches all look up at us. "Jacob?" Bella asks, standing and running over to him. She hugs him tightly and then looks at me. Since the letter told her that we might be together, I wonder if she's curious if we have. Too bad any hickies Jacob might have gotten have already healed. The wolf-on-wolf marks Sam left are just barely visible, though, and Bella notices them with her freakyass vamp powers.

"Oh, Jake, you okay?"

"Sure, sure, just got mauled by a moose," he says. When she looks aghast, he says, "No, actually, Sam and I had a fight.

But before Bella can ask, Jake notices Nessie. In the middle of the large room, Edward and Nessie are lounging on a sofa, daughter leaning against her father's chest at a right angle. Both are holding volumes of _The Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire_. Edward is still trying to read (block out thoughts?) but Nessie is watching Jake above the top of the book.

He smiles at her. "Hey there, flying squirrel princess."

She giggles and says, "Jacob, I am too old to play Attack of the Killer Flying Squirrel." They are referring to a game where Jake would carry her like superman and run around the house screaming "Attack of the Flying Squirrel." Not the most imaginative game, actually.

"Oh, are you?" he asks as she runs over to him, her book forgotten. He lifts her easily. In his arms like that, she looks much younger, much closer to her actual age than her physical one, since Jacob is so big. I bet Nessie will be short and petite like her mom.

She's showing him pictures now, and he's smiling. Yes, she's wearing the bracelet he gave her. But then she looks over his shoulder at me and says, "Hello, Aunt Leah!" and smiles. For some reason, I feel relief. What, did I honestly think that they were going to run off together?

"That's why I'm on your side," Edward mutters from behind _Rise and Fall_.

"Why?" I ask.

"Because seven is too young to be married." His topaz eyes meet mine and he smiles in a sort of predatory way. Edward and I… well, I don't completely hate him. I mean, I do, because he is an annoying leech and he's like, _so_ in love and it's gross, but something about Nessie starting to like me makes Edward at least pretend to be nice to me. And to his credit, he never actually called me a "Fallen Woman" to my face, after the now-infamous 'Virtue' conversation. The one in which I tried to explain that just because Jacob and I got to second base didn't mean we had to get married.

Jacob has settled down into a sofa with Nessie curled against him. Bella's on one side, Edward on the other. Rosalie, meanwhile, is over in a corner, waving me over madly. I walk over, and by the time I reach her, Alice dashes back downstairs with the doctor in tow.

"Hello, young man," he says to Jacob. He asks Jake for a new blood-sample, to compare to the ones he got from after one of the fights and from when he first became an Alpha. Jake agrees to go up to his home office in a bit.

I don't stick around, though, since Rosalie is leading me upstairs to her private sitting room in her and Emmett's part of the house.

"So?" she asks expectantly. "When did he come back?"

"Yesterday. After I left your house. There was a pretty nasty fight with Sam, too."

"What happened?"

"Sam's annoying, pregnant wife stopped Jacob from hurting him too badly."

"Huh….So?"

"So?" I repeat. I know what she's asking but I'm not just going to come out and say it.

"Did you?"

"Did I what?" I say.

She rolls her eyes. "Did you screw his brains out?"

"Oh, that. Yeah. Of course."

She gives me a high five and then devolves into giggles. "I mean, that's sort of gross, since he is so smelly—"

"This morning Embry said that I probably couldn't help it because Alphas must smell like sex."

"Ew. There is something very, very wrong with you if you think Jacob smells like sex."

The door opens and Alice peeks in. "Can I come in?"

"Of course. But we are talking about werewolf sex," Rosalie tells her.

Alice looks at me and says "We need to get you lacey panties!"

"Anyway, so how was it?" Rosalie pushes.

"Good."

She raises her eyebrow to indicate 'very good' and I nod. Alice just sighs at our general immaturity for having this conversation.

"Better than Sam?" asks Rosalie.

"Yes," I say, without thinking.

"What about post-Alpha Sam?"

"Oh. Um, we only did it once after he phased," I say. She, and even Alice, look at me expectantly, so I continue, "after he came to me and had me cut his hair. We never did it again after that." I'm not sure if they know what I'm talking about, but they are probably not too interested in the whole werewolf-short-hair business.

"Why not?" of course it's Rosalie who asks.

"Um, so, after I joined the pack, I heard through everyone's thoughts that when the males phased, they got this talk from the Council of Elders about how, um, certain things can be very dangerous, and I guess sex is one of them, since if they loose control or….get too excited….or whatever they could accidentally phase." There's a really awkward pause after that.

"That's the grossest thing I've ever heard," says Rosalie. I nod. It _is_ kind of weird.

"I didn't get that lecture, though."

"I guess they weren't worried about you sexing anyone up," says Alice lightly. "Or they assume that women are just more in control of themselves than are men."

"But Sam risked it with you?" Rosalie asks.

I nod, "But I don't know if he'd even had the 'no sex' lecture before that time."

"You and Jacob were okay, though?" asks Alice. It surprises me, because I didn't think Alice really approved of talking about sex outside of the panties angle.

"Well, he's the best at controlling his phasing. And we've been phasing for years. We aren't teenagers anymore." I shrug. We hadn't given it any thought.

Rosalie says, "Maybe that's what happened to Emily?"

I laugh. "No. A lot of people in the pack used to tease Sam about that and he freaked out. He insists he was nowhere near close to having sex with her. He just lost control."

"Huh. Well, that explains the 'Edward Reasons.'"

"If, indeed, they did wait until marriage. For all we know, they were just waiting until Sam could control himself," I say.

The door opens and Bella sticks her head in. "Are you talking about Edward?" she asks.

"Not really. Werewolf sex. You probably don't want to hear," Rosalie tells her.

"It's not too bad. Not graphic," Alice adds, and Bella comes and sits next to Alice.

"Sorry, I just wanted to give Nessie and Jacob some time to talk," Bella says, almost sadly. I wonder if she's jealous that Nessie now Jacob's number one focus. When he's not in bed with me.

"Wait, what would happen if a wolf _had _phased too close to you?" asks Rosalie.

I shrug. "I'd be okay, since _I _am wolf. It wouldn't be anything permanent. I wouldn't be like Emily."

"Wait, what does this have to do with sex?" Bella asks.

"Well, until we can control our phasing, the Elders think it's too dangerous," I tell her.

"That's what Edward said," Bella continues.

"Edward said that having sex with a werewolf is dangerous?" I ask, incredulous. I didn't know Edward talked about sex.

"No. He said it was too dangerous when I was a human."

"Well, yeah, the blood thing," I say. I really don't want to talk about vampire sex, especially not Bella/Edward vampire sex. It's so icky!

"No, he said he would crush me."

"Wait, _what_?" demands Rosalie. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. _And _I'm married to Emmett, so that's saying something." I know she's joking about this last part, but it is pretty funny.

"No, he was being really sweet!" Bella says.

"Um…" I can't believe I am saying this, but it seems like the obvious question. "Did you suggest _you_ being on top?"

Bella looks at me blankly. "No. Would that have worked?"

Rosalie just sighs. "Yes, Bella. It would be harder for him to 'crush' you that way."

"But what if he couldn't control himself?"

"Did you consider tying him down?" asks Rosalie. Alice and I giggle. Bella looks scandalized.

* * *

"Come to school with me?" Nessie is asking Jacob. We're all downstairs now, and there's food out for the two wolves. I'm surprised Seth hasn't shown up and tried to get fed, considering how much of a leech fanboy he is. Maybe he's worried that Jacob and I are having sex or something.

"Please, Jacob? Everyone says school is not safe for me, but it would be safe if I had you there, protecting me?"

"Honey, I think Jacob is a bit too old for middle school," says Edward.

"No!" she sounds impatient. Like she thinks her father is intentionally not understanding her. I wonder if it's true—wait, of course it is. He can read her thoughts. "He could go to high school. We could move somewhere!"

"I think Jacob looks too old for high school, too," says Esme, gently.

"I'm five!" Nessie insists. "I'm too old to be home all the time. I want to go to middle school or high school! I want to have friends!"

"But darling, we are your friends!" says Rosalie. To his credit, Emmett rolls his eyes at her.

"I don't think that's what she means," he says.

"Yes! See, Uncle Emmett understands me!"

"Uncle Emmett also got mauled by a magical bear with invisible nonscarring claws," says Jasper. I giggle but no one else does.

"Shut up, at least I'm not from the South."

"Boys," Esme says tiredly. "We're talking about Nessie right now."

"Please? Jacob, please?" Nessie is begging, and Jake looks like he has no idea what to do or say. I don't blame him. There's no easy answer. Taking Nessie to school would mean moving. Somewhere where the Cullens aren't known. Would Jake go with them? Doesn't that sort of defeat the whole Sam/Jake Alpha struggle? Shit, would that mean I'd have to go back to Sam after all?

Jacob is just petting her hair. "Ness, I don't know, it's up to your parents. But I promise you that one day you will get to go to school even if it's high school instead of middle school. Okay?"

Nessie looks like she's pouting, but she's so pretty and cherubic that it could just be her natural face.

"Honestly, middle school and high school suck anyway," I tell her. Edward gives me the "don't swear in front of my child" look. Whatever. Nessie laughs.

"Aunt Leah, you should come too!" she giggles.

"I think Leah and Jacob have something to talk about with Edward and Bella," says Jasper. "How about you and I go for a walk into the forest?" and what, see how many raccoons and squirrels you can murder? I wonder.

"Is it about sex?" Nessie asks. Everyone stares at her. "Because that's all you ever seem to talk about is sex. Is that what this is about?" she looks at each of us in turn. "I don't see why it's so fascinating to you all. It seems kind of gross."

Edward, meanwhile, is flashing a 'haha, that's _my_ child' smile.

But Nessie gets up gladly and follows Jasper out. Emmett trails after them, after flashing me about a thousand thumbs-up. Rosalie pulls Alice up to follow. I wave goodbye to them. It's funny to think that if Alice hadn't been nice to me, I would never have been here, sitting inside the Crypt, surrounded by vamps, their spawn, and their scent.

But what the hell do I need to talk to Bella and Edward for? Esme and Carlisle are still here as well, so maybe this is bigger than just a "You seduced my Jacob!" conversation.

Esme just smiles at me when they are gone and says, "Oh, honey, I am so happy. It's like you're one of the family!"

I turn to Edward and say, "In that case, my favorites are Maserati and Lamborghini," I laugh as I say it, so he knows I'm joking. But seriously. Those are nice cars.

"Okay, Leah, maybe for a wedding present."

"What, for when my mom marries Bella's dad?"

"No. For when you and Jacob get married. You know I don't approve of you living in sin." Edward says.

"I always thought 'living in sin,' sounded so romantic," Esme says.

"Mother!"

She shrugs and laughs. "I got married for all the wrong reasons when I was human. And Carlisle and I—"

Whatever she was going to say was cut off by an awkwardly faked coughing outburst from her husband.

"I was at your wedding!" insists Edward. "It was right after you were changed!"

Carlisle is still coughing. Guess those two didn't wait for their wedding vows. That's actually kind of funny.

I have the sense that Edward and Bella still don't really approve. Maybe they are hoping that Jacob pulls a Sam and leaves me for a more mature Nessie so that their daughter's life can be even more perfect and mine can suck even more. "Or maybe she's happy to see her best friend happy," Edward says, cutting into my thoughts to defend his Lady Love. Ah, how cute.

"Do we need to be worried about the power struggle at La Push?" asks Carlisle.

"I don't know, maybe. Sam doesn't want you guys around. I'm imprinted on Nessie, so…"

"So if you win, we win. We're on your side, you know," says Esme.

"Sure, sure, thanks, but that won't help. Actually, quite the opposite," Jacob says tiredly. Even here we can't get away from what's happening with Sam.

"The good news is I've run your blood work and you have some serious advantages," Carlisle says, referring to a stack of papers on the table. "Look, when I first got this kind of data on you, your body was going through significant changes—height, muscle and temperature increases, etc. Then it mellowed out. When you broke away from Sam's pack, you had a second mini-growth spurt, you got fractionally warmer, and your testosterone went up again. Then, too, it flattened out at the new level. Now look at where you are," Carlisle says, hading Jacob a print-out covered with numbers.

"Um?"

"Basically, it just says that your testosterone level has gone up exponentially over where it was when you first became an Alpha."

"What does that mean?"

"It means that you're a sort of…super Alpha. Do you want to know my theory?" asks Carlisle. Jacob and I nod.

"I think being around Sam is setting you off."

"Obviously," I interject.

"The Alpha is the wolf who is traditionally the largest, correct?" We nod again. But Jacob isn't growing any more, so that doesn't make sense.

"My dad's not saying that Jacob's getting taller," Edward says, "he means that Sam and Jacob are trying to—"

"I like the term 'out-Alpha' each other," Carlisle says.

"Like male sea lions," adds Esme. "The don't need to be that big, but whoever has the size advantage wins. So each generation gets larger and larger."

"Except that this is all happening within one generation," says Carlisle.

Jake presses his hands against his eyes. "So…what does this mean?"

"Well, it probably won't get much worse than where it is now. This increase was probably brought on by the confrontation yesterday. And I'd be really interested in what effect you being in wolf form for such a prolonged time had. But, practically speaking, you'll find yourself a bit more aggressive, with more of a temper."

"And you already _had_ a temper," Edward interjects. Can I just say that getting angry with leeches shouldn't count? "Although not as bad as your lady wolf," adds Edward, glancing in my direction.

"I'd say it might make you headstrong and disrespectful of rules, but my son tells me that this was already standard for you," continues the doctor, smiling. "So mostly I should think you'll be more inclined to fight instead of talk. Your, um, sex drive might also increase," he adds, almost as an afterthought. I try really hard not to blush. Bella looks like this new piece of information somehow explains how "her Jacob" ended up with me.

"Oh, is that all?" Jake asks, but he seems relieved that his loss of temper yesterday is explained. I think it really scared him, how badly he wanted to hurt Sam. "I just have to avoid Sam, then."

Carlisle nods and smiles.

"Oh, there is one last thing," says Esme. "Leah, please be a dear and invite your mother over to our house? It'd be really lovely to have her visit, especially now that she and Charlie are to be married."

I try not to giggle or even let my face twitch. My mother has a snowball's chance in hell of agreeing to come to Leech Central. But I nod politely and tell Esme I will see what I can do. If Edward chooses not to pass along my thoughts to his mother, that's his business.

* * *

It's the middle of the week by the time Jacob gets around to a furtive meeting with Quil Ateara, Sr. He was going to try to convince the old man to come to my house, the apparently official headquarters of Team Jacob-is-a-Good-Alpha. Not that anyone on the Rez apart from Seth and Embry know just how welcome Jake's reception is here. Actually, we haven't had sex since that first night. Scott is happy, because it means there's room for him in my bed. I'm unhappy, because I'd much rather have Jacob (no offense Scott.) Seth is pretending like he doesn't notice I watch him every night to find out if he's going out and how long he's going to be out for. But even if _Seth's_ away, my Mom is still here, and having your mother in a position to overhear you screaming your Alpha's name is really, _really_ too awkward to contemplate.

Honestly, I really just want to say, "So, mom, why don't you just stay over at Charlie's?" but that would weird her out. And I don't really want to think about that.

So Quil Sr comes at last to Billy's house. Billy is out—whether or not he knows about this meeting I couldn't say. It probably doesn't look good, since he's on the Council too. The entire Council can't be seen to be backing Jacob (or at least that's what Quil Jr told me). Jake insists that I be there—because I'm the beta? Because I'm the girlfriend? Seth, Quil and Embry aren't allowed to come; I suppose that would be too "obvious" that something is going on. Like I'm sure Sam has spies out all over La Push looking for us. Or maybe Jake just wants some privacy.

We're sitting at Billy's dinning room table. There's coffee. I'm sipping mine. Quil Sr. is giving Jacob a long, appraising look. Or else he's drifted off to sleep with his eyes open. I can't really tell.

"So, boy, you have noticed the changes in yourself since your return?" he says at last.

"Sure, sure, yeah, I have."

"Good," Quil Sr. continues. "I am surprised it took this long, but being in wolf form for so long would have naturally accelerated your transformation to true Alpha. My father always said that if he stayed in that form for a long time, his wolf traits were more noticeable even when he was human." Quil sighs and then adds, "But I would have thought you and Sam would have fought it out long ago."

"We tried to avoid each other," Jake says. Quil shakes his head and sips his coffee.

"This is a shame. Perhaps this business could have been sorted out long ago if you had not."

"So what's going to happen now? The Elders decide whether or not I get to keep my pack?" asks Jacob.

"It doesn't matter what the Council says. We cannot simply choose which one of you is more the Alpha. You must fight."

"They did," I say. "Jacob won."

Quil looks at me sharply. "They did _not_. My grandson tells me that Jacob allowed Sam to get up."

"What the hell was I supposed to do?" snaps Jacob. "Kill him?"

"No. You should have beaten him until he dared challenge you no longer." Jacob heaves an exasperated sigh but Quil keeps talking. "Now, you must fight him again. Whether or not you want to. You _will_. There can only be one Alpha."

"That's ridiculous. I don't want his stupid pack. I just want him to leave mine alone."

"It doesn't work that way. You, who are finally accepting that you are a wolf, should know this. Both you and Sam are behaving as Alphas. Your bodies have undergone the changes that we know Alphas undergo. This _cannot_ be undone. Your natural instinct is to fight until one of you dominates the other. This is as it must be. And Sam's young wife should have minded her business and not interfered."

As he says this, I bristle. I am sick and tired of this chauvinistic bullshit about women, but Quil looks at me and adds, "Ah, I am not talking about you, girl. No matter what the legends say, you are a wolf as sure as Jacob. The respect we give those who can change is owed to you as well."

I smile hearing this. Jacob looks pleased, but after a moment, we move back to discussing Sam.

Jake leans back in his chair. "Well, then can't the Elders just—"

"Don't you listen? No, we cannot. What would you have us say? That Sam is the more correct Alpha, but you are Alpha by blood? It is not this simple. Perhaps if your conduct were not so questionable…"

"What is questionable about his conduct?" I snap.

"Ah. Well, his relationship with the Cold Ones. They are our natural enemies. No," he says to Jacob, who is starting to interrupt. "Listen, boy. It does not matter whether or not they feed on humans. Their presence was enough to trigger the transformation in Sam and others. They _are_ our enemy. And you have imprinted on one."

"Nessie's only half—" Jacob starts to say.

"Yes. And you have an unbreakable bond with a child sired by our enemy. You are, as it were, in their thrall. Surely as bad as that poor Bella girl was. A wolf has two duties—to his Tribe, and to his imprint. Your duties tear you in opposite directions. You are very conflicted, for an Alpha," Quil says, but then he smiles at adds, "although perhaps your relationship with Miss Clearwater will convince some that you still value your people."

Jake and I are probably both wearing similar expressions of shock, because he waves his hand at us and says, "Oh, yes, I know about that. I am an old man; I have not lived so long that I cannot tell when two young people are smitten."

"My…our…relationship….doesn't have anything to do with anything!" sputters Jacob.

"Doesn't it?" Quil asks, and then shrugs. It's a strange gesture on so old a man. "Well, perhaps not, then. But _no one_ wants to see you father children by that half-breed."

"….don't tell Quil," says Jacob.

"I won't. You are right that he will be…concerned. But he will mistake his own feelings for Claire for what you should feel for that…Cold Child. You are his Alpha though; he will not question you." Quil turns to me, then. "We're you and Sam very close?"

It's an odd question, and I can't meet his eyes. For some reason, I answer it entirely too truthfully. "He used to talk about marrying me."

Quil sighs while Jacob shifts uncomfortably. I don't think Jake knew that.

"He will not take it well, then, when he finds out about your relationship with his rival."

"That's stupid. _Sam_ left _me_. What does it matter who I date?"

"Ah, I do not think you understand Alphas, nor men, at all," he says, almost sadly. And then in a completely different tone, "You know, I liked your father very much." I smile awkwardly. I never know what to do when people talk to me about Dad. "You remind me of him. Seth is like your mother; such nice people, those two. But you, young lady, are like your father."

I blush and look down at my nearly-empty coffee cup.

"And now, Miss Clearwater, I would like to speak to Jacob alone, if you don't mind."

"Yeah okay, sure," I say, standing awkwardly. I go and wait on Jake's front porch. Colin walks by at one point, but I duck behind a bush before he can see me.

Finally, Quil Sr. leaves. After Jake and I have said goodbye to him, I turn and ask what the hell was so important that they had to discuss alone.

Jacob blushes. "Um, well…" he pauses. "For one thing, he told me that leading up to whatever confrontation happens between me and Sam, we're both going to get very territorial and not like the other one on our territory. So he said I should figure out what territory is mine."

"Wait, what? So you and Sam are going to go around peeing in bushes all over the Rez? That's the most ludicrous thing I've ever heard."

Jake laughs. "No. That is _not_ what that means."

"Yeah, okay, so what else did he say that I couldn't here."

"Oh, you know."

"No. If I knew, I wouldn't be asking."

Jacob looks uncomfortable. "You know…more of the 'be careful having sex so you don't kill the girl' thing that Dr. Fang said. Except he said I was probably okay at phasing now to manage. And um, he said what with you being a wolf, too, that I probably couldn't hurt you."

I look at the pavement. "….That's an awkward thing for Quil's grandfather to say."

"Well, it got even more awkward when he said, 'Oh, but you know, my dad was still a wolf when he got my mother pregnant, so I don't think you have too much to worry about.'"

"Did he actually say that?"

"Yes. God, and then he started talking about how great-grandmother Black used to complain about her husband…okay, you know what, it was bad enough the first time. I am not going to relive it."

* * *

AN:

As always, thank you for reading, and please review! A special preview for next time: Sam and Jacob meet with the Council, and the drama gets even bigger.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer (Haven't had one in a while): **I do not own anything. Stephanie Meyer does, though. There aren't even any original characters that I could claim, except maybe in "Endless Daylight" there was a waitress at the coffee shop who doesn't have any dialogue and is only mentioned in passing.

* * *

It's a little worrying just how happily I'm eating the leech's food. Well, if I weren't eating it, they'd just be throwing it out. And they've started buying all my favorites. So there you are.

The downside is that I have to cook it for myself. Bella once offered to make something for me; she said it would remind her of the old days when she used to cook for Charlie. Good thing I have a line that I have drawn that I will not cross. Vamp food is okay. Bella-cooked food is not. I might catch something.

I've finished my meal though, and I'm pacing around Rosalie's sitting room. Alice and Bella are down the hall, and I think Esme might be with them. One day I am going to figure out what the hell Esme does all day. Anyway, Alice is trying to design a new hairdo for Bella to wear to the wedding, since mom and Charlie are close to setting a date. Mom told me this morning that they are trying to be as low-key about the whole thing as possible. I have a feeling that Bella and my hair (Alice is going to do mine as well) will be the fanciest things there.

Carlisle, I'm assuming, is at work, he being the leech with a job. I haven't seen Edward, maybe he's downstairs reading yet another tome with his daughter. I guess Jacob is coming over later, I don't know. The Council meeting is tonight, so for all I know he's off doing something to get ready. I keep trying to see him alone, but whenever we find a minute, Embry and Seth, or even Quil, or hell, my mom and Charlie, show up. He's only been home a week.

The other thing that's eating me alive is the fact that I'm not going to the meeting. I can't even explain why I want to be there so badly. I'm caught up in it all, though. I was the person Jacob left in charge when he was away. And Sam wasn't just challenging Jacob's right to a pack, but my right as well. Sometimes I feel like he's challenging my right to _exist. _

I wonder if Jacob will tell me everything afterward, and when the next time I will get to see him alone will be. As horrible as it was when he was away, it's almost worse now. Having him once has just made me want him again.

I've just been explaining to Rosalie about how much I hate not having sex with Jake. She's being sympathetic. "But you did it a lot with him the other night, right?"

"Only twice."

"Last time we talked about it, you said three times," she says, giving me a look that suggests I am under exaggerating and otherwise being dramatic. I suppose the "honestly, I think I shall die" comment I made earlier might have made her think this.

"Well, it was twice. I just _came_ three times."

"Then it's three. Why would you count it the other way? I don't want to know how many times _he_… ew, that's just gross."

"Fine. Three. Whatever. We were going for four and stupid Seth and even-stupider Embry came home."

"Did they walk in on you?" she asks.

"No. I would have mentioned that before if they had."

"Alice walked in on me and Emmett once." I stare blankly at her and then giggle. The only way that could be funnier is if it were Edward, but for that to happen, they'd both have to be thinking really hard about something _other _than sex or he'd know.

"Poor Alice. Anyway, there's no way anyone's going to walk in on me having sex with Jake now, since we don't even ever get enough time alone to." I say. She tells me that I should just plan a 'romantic getaway in Seattle' at a hotel like a normal person.

"_And_ the damn meeting is tonight," I say, ignoring her hotel comment. It's far too practical. Anyway, people would notice if we disappeared. It would sort of give our relationship away.

"What meeting?"

"You know. The Tribal Elders are going to meet with Sam and Jacob and tell them what to do."

"I thought you already had that."

"No, that was just Quil's grandfather giving Jake sex advice about how not to kill me," I tell her.

"Oh, right, so when are you going?" she asks, not realizing it's sort of a touchy subject with me.

"I can't. I'm not invited."

"Oh. It's just Sam and Jacob?"

"Yes, but that's not the point! I should be allowed to go! It concerns me just as much as anyone!" I'm pacing more quickly now. Rosalie is just watching me, probably not understanding why this is so important.

"Is Sam's beta going?"

"Jared? No. I don't think so. Ugh but it's not fair!"

"We could watch a movie instead. Take your mind off of it," she offers, and I know she's just trying to be kind. "Nessie really wants to rent '13 Going on 30.'" Okay, if that's supposed to be a tempting offer then it utterly failed. But I laugh anyway, to think about Nessie watching that movie.

"Rosalie, you don't understand. I _need _to know what they say in that meeting!"

"You could always listen at the door," I know she's joking, but I stop pacing.

"That's a decent idea. It'd be better if we could station Edward across the street or something, he could listen in, and then tell me about it."

"I thought we weren't allowed on your land?" she asks, smiling.

"This is no time to follow silly rules. We will have to disguise him though…"

"As what, a zombie?"

I sigh. She's right. This is a horrible plan. But then an even better one comes to me. "Okay, I've got it. We get Jacob to take Nessie along. Then she can replay the whole thing back to me later. Jake can say that being separated from his imprint for even five minutes would kill him…"

"Or you could just try to go along yourself."

"Already tried. My mother laid down the law on me."

"How old are you again?" Rosalie teases.

"You clearly don't know my mother," I say. Quil Sr. might have said that my mom was nice, but she can still be kind of scary. "She told me, Seth, Embry and Quil the other day that none of us under any circumstances were allowed to be there. I guess it's like a secret Alpha thing."

She rolls her eyes. "Are you sure this whole 'Alpha' business isn't made up?"

"Sam's not that creative."

"Hey, Leah, I have to tell you something," she says. "You know how Nessie is living through books?" I nod. That kid is going to go wild when she's finally allowed out. She'll probably get tacky tattoos and her tongue pierced and turn into that girl from the movie "Thirteen."

"Okay, so she was reading _Tess of the D'Urbervilles _yesterday and you know what? She said, 'Aunt Rose, Tess reminds me of you and Aunt Leah.'"

I blink. "Um, wow. Isn't Tess the one who gets raped by one guy and abandoned by another?"

"Yeah, that's the one."

"Huh." There doesn't seem much to say to that, so I shrug and say, "Nessie's a perceptive kid."

And Rosalie, to her credit, laughs. That's what I like about her—she understands that sometimes you laugh about things that aren't funny because otherwise they are too hard to think about.

"Leah, you're forgetting the part where Tess kills him," she says. It's my turn to laugh.

But seriously, we need to get Nessie away from 19th century literature. I say as much to Rosalie and she agrees. "Let's get her to read romance novels!" she giggles.

"What, the horrible pornographic ones with 'flaming love spears' and—"

"Flaming love spears? What the hell is wrong with you Leah?" she ask.

"Did someone say 'pornography'? What exactly do you talk about when I'm not here?" says Emmett, who has suddenly appeared at the doorway. "Oh, look, it's the Lady Wolf!" he says, plopping down on the sofa next to Rosalie.

She stands though and turns to me. "Leah, stay here, I'm just going to run down the hall and ask Alice and Bella if they want to do a movie night. I can't have you moping about the stupid secret Alpha meeting." She leaves.

"What, they have a club house now?" Emmett asks. "Secret decoder rings? Tell me you shape-shifter-werewolf-things have secret decoder rings."

"Yes, we do. And we send each other messages that say 'vamps suck.' Ha. I'm so funny."

"It's certainly a better attempt than the 'vampires bite' one from last week," he retorts.

The door opens again, but instead of Rosalie, it's Jasper. Carrying the Seattle times. He goes and sits on one of the chairs and starts reading it. Emmett doesn't seem at all annoyed that his brother has just come into his room to read the paper.

"Hey Jasper," I say and he looks up. "You wouldn't be willing to manipulate my mother's emotions to the point of her allowing me to come to the meeting tonight, would you?" I ask. Rather than answer he just gives me one long stare and then goes back to unfolding his paper.

"I guess not," Emmett says.

"This is so annoying! If you guys could turn into bats or mist or something like proper vampires then spying would be so much easier!"

They both look at me. "Look who's talking, Miss werewolf-who-doesn't-change-at-the-full-moon," says Jasper.

"Wait, mist?" Emmett asks.

Jasper rolls his eyes. "Dracula could change into mist."

"That's kind of stupid," says Emmett.

"You know what my favorite part of _Dracula_ was?" asks Jasper. I don't say anything, because I have a hunch about what he's going to say. "The part where all the wolves obeyed him."

"Yeah, and Dracula could change into a wolf, too, so I guess he was a werewolf, too," I snap.

"Then maybe _you_ should be able to turn into mist," says Emmett. "Haha, mist. That's the stupidest power ever. That's so epically bad of a power it's like Aquaman bad."

"Jasper, is all you ever do read the Seattle Times? Because this is the second time I've seen you—" I start to say.

"Yes. That's all I do. Ever. Since you've seen me reading the newspaper _twice_, it's a good bet to assume that that is literally all I do all day, every day. Speaking of newspapers, why don't you go _fetch_ one?"

I roll my eyes at him. "Actually, I think I will just go and rub garlic on myself and come back, vampire."

"That would actually be an improvement to how you smell, dog."

Emmett, meanwhile is cracking up. I'm just about to hit Jasper with a really good insult (which I haven't thought of yet) when Jasper starts on his brother. "What are you laughing at, bear-boy?"

"I'm laughing at you mock Lady Wolf. I'm on your side, moron."

"Oh, wow, Emmett, 'moron' is such an original insult. Why don't you go put gel in your ringlets and leave me alone?"

"To read your newspaper like you do all the time?" I interject. He rolls his eyes at me.

"Oh, my god, Jasper, what is it with you and my ringlets? Jealous much?" Emmett says.

"You know how I feel about them."

Okay, so this is a new one. I haven't heard about the ringlet thing. Jasper sees my puzzled expression and decides, for once, to do something useful and explain. "Emmett's ringlets are sort of ridiculous, don't you think? On a man who pretends to go around being all tough."

"Shut the hell up about my ringlets, pretty boy. They were the first thing Rosalie noticed about me!"

"Oh, right. She obviously saw your curly hair before she saw the blood all over you and your gaping flesh wounds from where you were mauled by a bear. Of course she saw the hair, since you weren't even actually mauled by a bear, but instead wandered drunkenly into a pit. So yes, your story makes sense. And you know it's awkward when you call me a 'pretty boy,' since I am your wife's _twin _and I think she'd be really upset if she knew you were hitting on me again." Jasper opens his newspaper and pretends to ignore Emmett.

"I am _not _hitting on you!" Emmett bellows.

"You keep calling me pretty. And we all know you have a thing for blondes," Jasper says slowly, as if explaining a very complex idea.

"I mean you are pretty in the manner of a woman—"

"I know, that's what I'm saying."

"—because you are practically a girl and not really masculine so you should just shut the hell up about my ringlets," finishes Emmett.

"I just think they are a funny hairstyle for someone who goes around trying to be ubermasculine all the time. 'Oh, look, I'm Emmett, and I'm really buff and I eat bears but I've got silly hair.'"

"I'm _so_ much more badass than you are and you're obviously just jealous."

"Yes, Emmett. You are more badass than I am. You know, because I've never really been in a fight before or anything." And then he goes back to the newspaper.

Emmett just makes a 'ugh' sound and looks over at me. "Sorry for my brother's immaturity." I laugh, because out of the two of them, Jasper is clearly the least immature.

From behind his newspaper, I hear Jasper say, "You know, Emmett, your ringlets are so ridiculous that if there were a movie made about your life, the costume designer would cut them out. Otherwise no one would take movie-Emmett seriously. Even less seriously than _I _already take you. You'd probably have a shaved head and go around wearing hooded sweatshirts instead of those little sweaters." He must mean the white knit pull-over Emmett has on. It's Ralph Lauren or Tommy Hilfiger or something. I don't know.

Emmett narrows his eyes and says, "Rosie gave me this for my birthday."

"Yes. I bet she did. It looks nice with your _hair_," says Jasper.

"Well, if they made a movie about you, no one would watch it because you are just a blond Southern pretty boy."

"Wow, Emmett, you are really winning this argument with your subtle attacks," Jasper retorts.

I don't know if Emmett was planning on responding, because Rosalie materializes and takes her place on the sofa next to him.

"The girls are definitely on for a film night," she says to me. "Hello, Jasper, everything alright?"

"Yes. But I came up here because your husband's blathering is preferable to listening to Edward play the same damn piece on the piano over and over again."

"Were they arguing?" Rosalie asks me. I nod. "Ugh. You know, they haven't come up with any new material in fifty years."

"That's because Jasper continues to be jealous of how manly I am and how awesome my hair is," mutters Emmett.

"So, Leah, what movie do you want to watch?" Rosalie asks, but before I can answer, Edward sticks his head in.

"Hello, loveleech," I tell him.

"You can't call me that anymore," he says tiredly (if bloodsuckers could be tired).

"Because you've stopped being a leech and started living off of tree sap instead of blood?"

"No, because now you're a lovepuppy. So whenever you make fun of me and Bella, I can just ask you about whether or not you and Jacob use the same dish for your dog food and if you go on walks together." Oooh, Edward's being witty! I should run for the hills! Since his insults are so hurtful and all.

And then Emmett gets a look on his face and starts to say something but Edward promptly freaks out.

"Em! That is disgusting!" he says. Oh. Of course Emmett would go _there_. I don't even have to have Edward's power to know what Emmett was about to say.

"And not very original," I tell him.

Emmett rolls his eyes at me. "Yeah, but it's funny. You know it is."

"In a sort of unoriginal way," Jasper says. Is he actually reading the paper or just holding it in front of his face?

Emmett cocks his head to the side and Edward's look of disgust increases. "Stop it! That's my sister you're thinking about!" says Edward.

"Emmett, you can be so immature sometimes. Honestly, I wonder why I married you," says Rosalie playfully.

"Oh, Rosie, you know exactly why you married me." And then Rosalie and Emmett sort of give each other matching smirks.

"Okay, this is beyond the pale. I'm leaving," says Edward, and he very carefully shuts the door behind him, as if some of Emmett's sex cooties or whatever might follow him out.

"I thought the whole point of making 'doggie style' references was to make fun of Jacob and Leah, not telling Edward more than he needs to know," Rosalie says.

"Yeah, but I am not going to imagine _them _together. That's revolting!"

"Thanks, I'm really feeling the love," I say.

* * *

Rosalie and I work out details for the movie. As much as I really don't want to watch one, she's right, it would take my mind off the meeting tonight. I'm going to run home for awhile though, first. Mom wants me to look at a picture of the dresses she wants for me and Bella. Considering how low-key this wedding is, I don't know why they are insisting on the dresses thing. I guess it's symbolic. I know my mom is trying very hard to accept that she will have leeches for in-laws.

I'm just leaving the Cullens' house when Jacob and Nessie come out of the forest. So he did come over, after all. Maybe he took her hunting. I know the bloodsuckers usually go for predators, but Nessie and Jake seem to hunt elk a lot. I don't know how he can stand raw meat. Guess he'd do anything for her, though. Nessie smiles at me as she runs into the house and throws a "Hello, Aunt Leah," my direction. Huh, I wonder if she's going to go read more _Tess _or something equally miserable.

Jacob's waiting for me by the forest. I smile at him. "Leah, can I talk to you?" Jacob asks. He looks upset about something, or maybe the word is concerned. God, he really is beautiful. I walk to him and stop, but now we're standing too close together. I feel tingly all down my body from the heat pouring off of him.

Is it possible to be drunk from someone's smell?

I have to look up to meet his eyes. Otherwise I'm staring right at his chest. I am tempted to reach out and brush my hands against his body. I want him so badly.

"You're doing it again," he says, and he doesn't sound happy.

"Doing what?"

"Are you listening to what I'm saying, or are you thinking about sex?"

"….um." What does he expect me to say? Of course I'm thinking about sex. He makes it sound like a bad thing. I'm dying to cover him with kisses though. To make love to him. To whisper in his ear that everything with Sam and the Council tonight will be alright.

He sighs. "So, um, is that what this is about to you?" He looks down as he says it, like he can't meet my eyes. It takes me a second to realize he's talking about sex.

"What?"

"Us. Is it just about sex to you? I want to know. I've been thinking about the other night, and I mean, I…" he trails off, still starting at the ground.

"Of course not."

"Leah, look me in the eye and say that this isn't just about sex." His voice has an edge to it.

I meet his eyes. He's frowning and there's a little crease on his forehead. "Jacob, this isn't just about sex." Of course it isn't. We're friends, too, aren't we?

"Are you _sure_ about that?" he says. He's really developing a tone. Of course I'm sure! Ugh, why is he being like this? "Because you told me you'd be my girlfriend. That means you have to let me be your boyfriend."

"What the hell does that mean?" I'm starting to get upset. I know I have a bit, okay, more than a bit, of a temper, and I need to work on it, but really, what is he accusing me of?

Look, _he_ is the one who came to me the other night. He's the one who stood in my room and asked if he could make love to me. Granted, I am the one who started shedding clothing…

"Are you ashamed of me?" he asks. He's looking away again. And almost, maybe, possibly, starting to tremble. But why is he being so ridiculous? Of course I am not ashamed of him. I tell him that as firmly as I can and ask where the hell he got this from.

"Because when I asked you if you'd date me, the first thing you said, in fact the only thing you said, was that then we'd have to tell people. What's so bad about telling people you're dating me?" His voice sounds…hurt.

"You know exactly what's so bad," I say, my voice rising. "You know how upset people will be!"

"So? Do I care? Have I ever cared about _upsetting_ people? Just because you don't think I'm as good as _Sam_—"

"Jake, what? What I'm trying to tell you is that this is complicated—"

"Complicated! No, clearly it's not complicated to you. You're just like the Council; ''Cold Ones' are evil, werewolves are good.' But with you it's 'Sam is the one true love and Jacob is just there for sex.'"

"Jake, do you even hear yourself?" How can he be saying this?

"No, Leah, do _you_ hear _your_self? How can you tell me that that's not how you see me when you won't even tell people—"

"Oh my god. I didn't want to tell people since you're imprinted and—"

"Why are you so obsessed with me being imprinted? I swear to god, you think about it more than I do. How many times to I have to tell you that I don't like Nessie like that!"

"How do I know that?" I'm getting close to shouting.

"Because I'm _telling _you! Damn it, Leah! Give me some fucking credit, please. I am not that guy!"

"What the hell, 'that guy?' I am so sick of men saying shit like that! Sam said he wasn't 'that guy' when he broke up with me, like that was somehow supposed to explain that it wasn't his fault for leaving!"

"Leah! I get it, okay? You hate men. You've told us all that about a million times. So could you just shut the hell up about it? Because I really, really don't care about how horrible you think men are. Yeah, okay, men are great when I am fucking you, but then as soon as we are done you are back to hating us!"

I blink. Wow. I mean, _wow_. He's pretty wound up. Finally, in a quieter voice, he adds, "I am not _that guy_ who just wants sex. And I'm _not _going to be like Sam," He can't meet my eyes as he says this.

"I don't think you're 'that guy.'" And I don't, either. If he were, I would have never gone to bed with him, would I? (Those sleepless nights over a year ago come back to me. When I remembered Sam's mother's song about two people being alone together. But even then, it wouldn't have been just sex, would it?)

"But you expect me to be happy like that. Leah," he sighs, "I wouldn't have slept with you the other night if I didn't really like you! Okay? It's just… it's really hard to know you like _him_ more than you like me!"

"Christ, Jacob, why do you keep bringing up _Sam?_ You have to be the single most masochistic person I've ever met. First you have your pathetic non-relationship with _Bella_ and now all you want to talk to me about is Sam!"

"Because you won't admit to it! I remember how things were, Leah, when we were in Sam's pack. All you used to think about was how much you wanted him back! Just like Bella after Edward left her. And once you told me that Bella and Sam were everything we want and everything we can't have! Do you remember that? Because I've grown up! I don't want Bella anymore. And I don't want Nessie. I just want _you_. And I thought I'd be okay with you just using me, but I'm not. It's worse than before. _That's _one of the things that tortured me in Canada, alright? One of the reasons I was scared to come back. Because I couldn't stand to be here and be with you and know that you will never love me like you love Sam!"

"Jacob! I _do not_ love Sam!" I shout the 'do not' part. We're both straining forward. He's definitely trembling now, but with what emotion, I don't know. I wonder if I look as horrible and angry as he does.

"Leah…"

"No, Jacob, it's my turn, so you can just shut the fuck up and listen to me. Yes, I like having sex with you. You were _really _good, especially since it was your first time. And yes, I thought about it _a lot_ while you were gone, and yeah, before you were gone, too. But give _me_ some credit, and don't act like I'm a complete slut!"

"I do not think you are a slut!"

"You do if you think I'd just have sex with you for no reason! You really want to know what it was like when I was with Sam? I loved him! A lot! I would have done anything for him. I used to let him have sex with me—"

"Is that what you're doing with me?" he demands. "Letting me have sex with you? Is that what the other night was?"

"Damn it! You are not listening to me! Four seconds ago you were pissed off because you thought all I wanted was sex and now you're mad because you think I don't want it?"

"Well, I don't know what you want! All I know is that everyone is telling me that all of a sudden I'm going to be a lot hornier because of being an Alpha and how do I know that's not why you want me? It's like I have no control at all over anything in my life and I don't even know what's going on, okay?"

"Exactly! Jacob, that's what I'm trying to tell you! Sometimes when I look at you, you look so sad and so scared! So…you know, vulnerable! And…I wanted to comfort you. Like that time you were at the Cullens' after Nahuel was here. I just…I wanted to have sex with you because I wanted to make you forget about everything!"

He finally closes his mouth and looks like he might actually stop arguing with me. But then he says, more quietly, "Tell me that's not the only reason you did?"

"Of course not. Weren't you paying attention when I told you that I thought you were worth following?"

"Yes! And I can't tell if you actually like me, or if Embry's right and you just like me because you're female and I'm the Alpha, or if it's because I'm the person that you screwing will piss Sam off the most!"

"What I am saying is that I would not have slept with you if I didn't respect you. I…" I sigh, "Yes, I wanted to get laid. But I've wanted to get laid for a long, long time, and I didn't, because….look, damn it, Jacob, can't you just accept that I _like_ you?" I lean forward and try to kiss him. Our lips press together but he won't open his mouth. Finally he pushes me back.

"Don't. That's not going to help."

"Then what do you expect me to do?" I ask. He doesn't say anything. .

Finally, when I realize he isn't going to speak, I sigh and start talking again. "What did you mean when I said I had to let you be my boyfriend?" I ask him carefully. He looks down before answering.

His voice wavers as he speaks. "I mean that you're the only thing in my life that makes any sense. Nessie, the pack, none of it is anything I wanted. I didn't _ask_ to imprinted, in fact, I think I asked for quite the opposite. And I sure as hell didn't ask to be in this stupid power struggle with Sam. The only thing I wanted that I have right now is you. You're the only thing in my life that I am actually choosing. But I don't know what you want. And I wish you'd tell me. I wish you'd talk to me."

"I do talk to you. We're talking now."

"Now doesn't count because I forced you to talk to me. And the only thing you wanted to talk about after we had sex was Nessie. Leah, I _know_ that there's a lot going on with you. You aren't a simple person. And I like that. It wouldn't kill you to let people see _you_, you know."

"Yes, it would. Don't you remember when I was in Sam's pack?"

"Yes. I do. And you know what? At least then you let yourself feel something."

"No, I didn't. I focused on Sam so I wouldn't have to think about anything else. Like my dad." My voice breaks. God _damn_ it. I will _not_ cry.

And in a second his arms are around me. "See? I will not think less of you if you cry."

"Yes, you will."

"No, I won't." He gently tilts my chin up and looks at me. I stare at the ground, but then he says, "Leah, look at me," and I do. And I have to bite my lip to not cry.

I look away. I can't deal with how he's looking at me right now. "Fine, you know what? I was crying in the forest that day. Okay? After Sam's wedding. There, I admitted it."

"I know," he says, and I accidentally make eye contact again. "Did you ever stop to think that sometimes _I _might be trying to comfort _you_?" And then _he _finally kisses _me_. It's like the first time, when we were in the forest. There's that electric spark. Not that kissing Jacob is ever mediocre, but this is special. But the second our lips touch, I feel it again. All the way up and down my body.

I don't press my body against his, though. For some reason, my feet stay planted. He keeps one hand on my cheek and puts the other behind my back. God, his lips are so warm. I realize then that I'm crying and I try to pull away but he holds me there. We aren't kissing as innocently, now. His tongue is in my mouth and he's moaning into my mouth.

Eventually, though, he pulls away and looks down at me. "We're both pretty messed up, aren't we?" he says quietly.

I nod. "Yeah, just a little bit."

* * *

We didn't make love. He had to get ready for the Council meeting. And anyway, I guess it would have sort of undercut everything we talked (shouted) about if we were to just go at it. Which means now I'm incredibly turned on with no outlet. Goddamn stupid Tribal Elders and their stupid meeting. I wish I could have wished him good luck properly, let him go to the Council with my lips still burning against his skin.

We were friends before he left to Canada. Or if not friends, then almost friends. Friends, I suppose, because I was closer to him than I was to anyone else in the pack, except maybe my brother, and Seth doesn't count. Before the leeches, I really didn't have any friends, except maybe Jacob. So, then, we were friends, friends before we ever kissed. And then I started to realize he wasn't just little Jacob, the lovesick boy (lovesick over Bella, over Nessie, who cares which) but was becoming a man.

But when did that happen? Because to me it seems like one day I saw him and he smelled _male_ and his body didn't look so strange on a boy so young and meeting his eyes made little shivers of desire run up and down my arms. Was I too busy wishing Sam hadn't left me that I missed this change? And I know it has nothing to do with Jacob being an Alpha, because when I joined his back, I didn't think of him this way, did I?

So now I'm back at Leech Central. We're watching "13 Going on 30" after all. Nessie seems to be enjoying it. Maybe because it _is _sort of her life story. After it ends, it's late and Nessie refuses to go to bed. ("I am _not _so young!") Emmett and Jasper promise to keep her entertained somehow—I guess Candy Land is out, but maybe they'll play Risk, It's foggy, so Rosalie and I race Bella's Ferrari against Alice's Porsche and Bella and Edward take the Vanquish. I need to stop wondering about the meeting. Really.

"I love driving this car," I say as I accelerate around a curve.

"You still drive kind of slow," Rosalie says.

"I drive fast considering I'm actually _alive_."

After about an hour we call it quits. And then, because we're feeling bold, we drive the Ferrari home. I leave it idling in my driveway and get out. Rosalie opens her door and runs over to my side of the car. "Ooooh, I feel so dangerous!" she laughs, getting into the driver's side. I wave as she drives away, revving the engine.

Take that, Sam! I let a bloodsucker drive onto La Push! She even got out of the car to pseudo-breathe our air. I feel so incredibly badass right now.

Seth and Embry are playing Halo. Someone is yelling at them in Chinese, another player, I'm guessing. Seth tried to explain it to me and mom once, how you could shoot people from all over the world. Mom asked him what the point was. It was pretty funny.

"Was that a car I heard?" asks Seth.

"Maybe."

"Sounded like a Ferrari."

"Maybe."

"Oooh can I drive it?" he asks, putting down the Xbox controller.

"There is no car in our driveway, Dweeb," I say, opening the fridge.

He looks puzzled. Ha, he shall never know of my deed of ultimate badassness. "Oh, Leah, you didn't! You know how angry the Elders would be?" he asks. Damn, I guess he's not as dull as I thought. He must take after me.

"I think that's the point," Embry says, while mashing a button. "Wow, Leah, that's really mature. Getting back at them for not letting you at the meeting by allowing one of the bloodsuckers to drive across the Rez."

"Shut up, Embry. No one asked for your stupid opinion," I say. These two clearly do not appreciate rebellion.

"Is Jake back yet?" Seth asks.

"Does it look like it?"

He shrugs. "I just figured he'd come find you…" Seth makes an 'that's awkward' face and goes back to Halo. "Oh, yeah, Leah, there's no food left in the fridge. We ate it all."

I glare at him. Little monster. "Mom clearly left some of that food for _me_," I say.

"Oh, yeah, I ate that part," says Embry without any trace of guilt or regret.

"I thought Mom had started leaving food around for you, too."

"I ate that," says a voice from behind me. Quil. He's coming out of the bathroom. "There was a bit left, but we gave it to your dog."

"Oh, it's you," I say to him. "I hate you all, you know." Quil just gives me one of those dumb male head nods as he goes to sprawl across the sofa which Embry and Seth are leaning against. I'm surprised to see him here, but then again it is an important night. And it's past Claire's bedtime.

"You're all over waiting for Jake?"

"Obviously," says Embry as he shoots someone else. "Where were you, oh beta? Over with the bloodsuckers? That's great, on the night Jacob is out trying to explain that we are not the pro-leech pack."

"But we _are_ the pro-leech pack! The Cullens are really nice!" Seth says. I take a seat on a chair and watch mindlessly as the boys shoot people and run around or whatever the hell is going on. God, what is taking so long? Are they out there drawing a line across the Rez so that Jake and Sam can each have their territory? Did Jacob tell them about our relationship? Shit, what is my mother going to say if my sexual history starts being talked about in front of her and the other Elders. They've been at it for hours.

* * *

Or maybe they got hungry and all went to dinner. In Seattle. That would explain the amount of time they've been chatting. And by the way, this video game seems utterly lame to me. How are the boys so entranced? And by boys I mean those horrible smelly tumor-like things that ate the food my mom left. I could starve to death. Well, okay, I did eat earlier at the Cullens, and again when I was hope before the movie. But a girl needs her food.

I'm actually starting to wish I had one of Rosalie's issues of "Cosmo" because even reading articles about "how to please your man" would be preferable to this. But then Quil would make a smartass comment about how I'm single and don't need to read articles like that, and then Embry would giggle awkwardly and it would come out that I'm had sex with Jacob and then it would just be awkward. Then again, Quil might find out tonight anyway, depending on what happens at the meeting.

* * *

Screw this, I am going to bed. Staring up at the ceiling is preferable to listening to my pack talk to each other. I get plenty of that in wolf form, thank you. Scott, the little traitor, stays curled up on Quil's lap. I don't bother changing into my pajamas or getting under the covers, I just lay across the bed. I changed the sheets after Jacob was here. But I wish they still smelled like him. Then I could take naps and pretend he's here. I'd have the possibility of finding stray Jacob hairs on my pillow. I roll over to the left side of the bed. When he was here, he slept on the right. Well, we were both sort of at an angle. He so he'd fit better. Me so I'd be parallel to him. If I shut my eyes tight enough, maybe I can imagine that he's there.

Someone knocks on my door. "Unless you are delivering a pizza, go away," I shout.

Seth pokes his head in. "They don't deliver to bedrooms, Leah."

"Well, thank you for telling me that. I didn't know." I turn on my lamp and glare at him.

"I thought you'd want to know that Jake called," he says. I sit up so fast the room sways around me. "He's going home. He sounded tired. But he said to tell everyone he'd talk to us tomorrow morning. Basically, nothing much happened. The Elders said Jacob and Sam would have to fight. They said that now that Jacob is back from Canada and is finally growing up to the point of fighting Sam, then he and Sam have to finish it. They said there can't be two Alphas or it will tear our Tribe apart. That the Alpha is also Chief and is also obviously on the Council, and they don't know now if it should be Jake or Sam and it can't be both of them because it was hard enough to get the two of them to be calm during this meeting. Apparently they can't go five minutes without arguing…."

"Is that all?" I ask. My voice sounds bitchy, even by my standards. Well, I'm sort of pissed. I was kind of expecting Jacob to come over.

"Yeah, Leah, sorry to bother you. I just thought you'd want to know…" he turns and starts to leave.

"Ugh, Seth, don't be like that. You know I'm just a bitch. Don't take things so personally."

"You aren't a bitch, Leah. You're my sister." He's leaning against my doorframe now.

"You're too nice for your own good, you know that right?"

"I like being happy. If I weren't happy, I'd be depressed all the time." If Seth were anyone else, I'd snap that obviously, if a person isn't happy, then they are sad. It's a tautology. But it's my baby brother, so I don't say anything. He says, "It keeps me from being sad about Dad."

"Seth…"

"I'll let you go to sleep," he says, backing out into the hall.

"You aren't a complete dweeb," I shout after him, turning off the lamp. Okay, sleep now. As if I could sleep.

I roll back onto my side and stare at the place where I wish Jacob was. Then I hear a noise, like something hitting glass. I sit up. It happens again.

God, what is that? I turn my lamp on again and go over to my window. As I look, a rock hits it. Jesus, someone is throwing rocks at my window. It's hard to see through the glass because of the light from my lamp. I'm peering out when I notice a shape. A big Jacob-shaped blob is standing out there throwing rocks.

I wrench the window open. "Are you throwing rocks at my window?"

"I might be," he says. He's standing just on the other side of the bushes.

"Jake, you moron, you could have knocked on the glass. My window's on the first floor." As I speak, he comes toward me.

"I was being romantic."

"Throwing rocks at my window?"

"Yes. I was going to sing but I thought that would just annoy you. And before you freak out, no, your mom will not see me and think I'm robbing the house, she's still at the meeting. As soon as they finished with me and Sam, they started about what they're going to do about your mother marrying Charlie."

"It's nice to have another scandal to take everyone's minds off us," I say, but I'm staring at his lips. Thank god I don't have a window screen.

I'm leaning forward to kiss him when he says, "I didn't tell them about us."

I shrug and ask, "You said the Council is still meeting?" He nods. "So your dad isn't home?" I say in what I hope is a suggestive voice.

He leans right up next to me and puts his lips against my ear. "No. But he _will_ be, and I want this to last."

I have to bite my lip to keep from moaning. "So you don't mind then? I thought you didn't want this to be just a…"

"Leah, I never said I didn't want to have sex with you." Oh god. His breath is on my ear and I can feel my body starting to react already. He traces his lips against my jaw slowly and I give up on the not-moaning policy. "I just said I don't want this to be only about sex. So we will talk first."

"Right, talk, uh huh," I mumble, taking his hand and trying to pull him through my window into my bedroom. Suddenly I am less warm and he's moved back a few inches. He offers me his hand. "Come on, let's go talk."

"What, outside?" I say, looking back at my bed.

"That's what wolves do. I heard there was a certain girl-wolf here who wanted to know every detail of what happened with the Elders?'

I reach to take his hand. As unbelievably aroused as I am, I do actually still want to know about the meeting. Jacob helps me through the window and then we're at the edge of the forest. I run off a way to phase in the bushes and then we're running.

* * *

_Seth said you'd gone home_, I think.

_That was my sneaky plan. I ran home and called him and then came over. _I left my clothes in my stash, but he's got some tiny bundle strapped to his ankle. It actually looks like a bandage. How small of shorts is he wearing these days? _They'll be pissed when they find out._

_They won't. Anyway, you should know first, you're the beta_, the thinks at me. And then he's thinking about everything that happened, remembering it so I can see.

I see the Elders sitting together, Jacob and Sam facing them. Jake's memories carry annoyance at Sam, annoyance at himself that he's so desperate to fight. _It shouldn't be this hard to control myself_, Jacob thinks. And then the Council is talking. Jake says I should be there, that I have just as much a right as anyone.

_Thank you_, I think.

Sam says that this is exactly what the problem is, a perfect example of how Jake is an unfit Alpha. Sam doesn't bring Jared everywhere. Jacob clearly doesn't take his responsibilities seriously. Obviously doesn't think he can manage a pack on his own, without his beta's help.

Jake tells Sam that I'm not Jared and that my brother and I have better bloodlines than he, Sam, does, since we're Blacks on our dad's side and Uleys on our mom's.

More arguing. It's funny, since most of the Elders have family in Jacob's pack but they can't openly support him. And then they start going through every single legend they know of that even almost relates. No wonder it took so long. Jacob speeds it up for me and tries to only think about the interesting parts. I wonder if he tuned out the boring parts and that's why he isn't remembering. _Leah, do you want to see this or not?_

_Ok, fine, I will be quiet. _Ultimately, they agree with what Quil had already told us. Jacob and Sam have to fight. And then I see Jake refusing. He says it's ridiculous. He won't fight Sam because he doesn't want Sam's pack. He just wants to be left alone. And he won't defend the leeches or the breaking of the treaty—it's not his place to defend it.

Sam says he isn't taking responsibility for what he did since he is the one who broke it. Who ran off. And then ran off to Canada. More arguing.

_Sam's a jackass_, I think. We've been out here for about an hour thinking together about the Council. _But you're going to have to fight him. You can get out of it, even if you don't want his stupid, oversized pack. _

_I know,_ he thinks. I can feel resignation.

_Should we head back?_ There's not much left to say about the meeting.

_No. _I look around and realize we're in a meadow. I was too busy thinking about the Council and what it means for Jacob not to fight.

He pads into the clearing. _Come on, let's phase_.

_What? Here? I left my clothes at home!_

He rolls his eyes, which is sort of amusing, actually, seeing a giant wolf roll its eyes. _That's sort of the point_.

_Oh…._damn my overactive imagination! If wolves could blush…

_Yes, exactly. _

_Jacob, I will not phase in front of you. It's gross. Hair zooming into my body. And we can't! We're outside!_

_Leah, I've seen you naked before, as you reminded me last week. And now I've seen you _very _naked. _

_Well, you go over there and I will phase behind this bush_. I run over toward some particularly thick growth.

_You're being ridiculous. _But he's laughing in his thoughts. When I peak out from behind the bush, he's standing in the meadow. There's just enough light from the moon for me to see the lines of his muscles…. Oh god. Why am I suddenly really nervous?

"I know you've phased by now," he says. His voice is low and husky, like it was when we had our little sleepover. "Come out."

"Yeah, or I could stay over here," I say. He smiles and holds his hand out, like he did at my window.

"Come on, I've _seen _you."

So I stand up, but I keep my arms covering myself. He smiles at me. Well, it is sort of darkish out here… so I take his hand.

He pulls me against him (okay, that's very nice) and kisses me. And then he lifts me and I'm on the ground. It's sort of soft, actually. And not dewy yet. I reach up to him. "Jacob, come down here," and he does.

After a few moments he makes a sort of growling noise at me. "It's very hard to have foreplay if you keep rubbing your body against me like that," he whispers in my ear. But there is too much skin here, too much touching, for me to concentrate. I just want _him_.

But he's being unhelpful and kissing all over me. My mouth, my neck, my breasts, my stomach and then I'm squirming but damn it, he's stronger than I am, and then lower and I'm moaning, or whimpering, I don't know, and he has to hold my hips down. But he's doing that and so his body isn't pressed against mine, I can't feel how warm he is and I want to, I want to kiss him, and I don't care if he'll taste like me and I'm grabbing his hair and pulling him up.

"Not very patient, are you?" he says and then he reaches toward his ankle and I suddenly realize why he's brought that stupid bandage tied on his leg, what it's holding, and I laugh and say "so this wasn't so spontaneous after all," and he doesn't say anything, just kisses me and I tell him it's stupid because I'm infertile anyway and he tells me to stop talking so he can kiss me.

But then he asks me if I meant what I said about him being good earlier and I say "yes, of course, please, Jacob, oh god, _now_," and he won't but then finally I think the noises I'm making or the way our bodies are moving against each other gets too much for him because finally he does.

And afterward I lay on his chest and we watch the sky turn from dark blue to light pink and I talk to him about stupid things that I never talk about and somewhere off in the distance a wolf howls.

* * *

AN: I have a confession. The chapter wasn't supposed to end this way. There is a lot that happens right after this, but I missed the Cullens too much, so I decided that Leah needed to spend some time with them. So lots of things got moved into Chapter Five. (Chapter five already??)

Remember, reviews are love! Thank you very much to everyone who has been reviewing! I read them all over and over and think about what you are telling me and get all happy that people are enjoying my story! It also tells me what you want to see more of. (But if you tell me you want less of Leah then there is nothing I can do.)


	5. Chapter 5

AN: Hello! You may be wondering why it was such a long time between updates this time… It really was just a case of school starting and having to get moved in and then do loads of reading and write an essay… Ahem. Also, I was without internet for about a week, but I did work on this! I suppose I could have posted what I had as soon as I had internet, but that would have meant a significantly shorter chapter (less than the half as long as the others). I like my chapters to have a certain about of drama, angst, plot, character development, etc, instead of "the lemon chapter" and "the Jake and Leah talk chapter" so I made you all wait. Anyway, here it is.

Anyway, thank you VERY MUCH to everyone who reviewed! I wrote this for you guys! It was amazing that I was still getting reviews after not posting for about two weeks!

It was also pretty exciting for me though to get all the chapter 4 reviews at once after chapter 5 was already half done, since a lot of things that people seem really anxious for are in this chapter… Someone would say "Oh, but what about…" and I would think, "ha, I have an answer!" Also, if you've been wanting to know what's going to happen with Sue and Charlie, this is the chapter for you. However, Jacob doesn't seem to be in any hurry to fight Sam…. Yet….

This chapter picks up _right_ where the other left off, so I am putting the last paragraph of that one here. No, you haven't gone insane.

* * *

And afterward I lay on his chest and we watch the sky turn from dark blue to light pink and I talk to him about stupid things that I never talk about and somewhere off in the distance a wolf howls….

* * *

….He listens, mostly. His hands stroke my hair and my shoulders and my back, and his lips press against my forehead occasionally. His breathing is deep and slow and I feel so calm. I lay my head on his chest and listen to his heart stamping out a rhythm as I talk.

It's not really like watching the sunrise, because we're just staring up at the sky with trees all around the edges of the meadow. But the stars disappear, one by one, and if I were a poet I would say something about the symbolism of that and of my life, but as it is I just murmur to Jacob one story after another. Not that they are secrets, not things I have never told anyone. Just things I have never told him. Silly things, like my favorite foods, and personal things, too, but only after I've been talking for a while and I stop thinking so much abut what I should and shouldn't say. I tell him that sometimes I am really jealous of Seth, and because he asks and tells me it's okay, I tell him about how I felt when I lost my virginity. I don't tell him where we were (Sam's room) or that it was awkward and we fumbled with each other's bodies but mostly he just fumbled with mine because I was too shy to touch him. I don't tell Jacob that afterward I stared up at his ceiling (painted blue, like the rest of his room, from when he was a little boy and his mother was spoiling him because she felt guilty that his father had left) and thought "oh, is that it?" What I tell Jake is that I was nervous and worse, scared, and that yes, it hurt, but I made myself not cry. Things like that. I talk until my voice is hoarse.

When he speaks, his voice is lower even than normal. Maybe it's because I can hear it rumbling around inside him before it escapes out into the air. He tells me things, too, his mouth up close to my ear. As the sky lightens, I can see him better, and I get embarrassed about being naked, naked and outside. He runs his hands over my body and teases me about how modest I am. I'm not really, though, and he knows it, because of the things I whispered into his ear a few hours ago when I wanted him so badly. The truth is that I like being here with him, and I don't mind if he sees me naked. It just makes me feel vulnerable. His arms are around me, though, so I suppose I'm safe, since he's the most dangerous thing for miles, but that's not the point. I'm the second most dangerous thing. He's the only one around who could hurt me and the only one that I'm worried about being vulnerable with.

He lays his head back in the grass and shuts his eyes. "Tired?" I tease, moving up so I can kiss him. He puts his hands on my waist and nods sleepily.

"You wore me out."

"But Carlisle said—" I start to say, planning to joke about his supposedly Alpha sex drive, but he flips me over so I'm underneath him.

"Please don't talk about the leeches when I'm trying to have my way with you, Leah," he says.

But he doesn't make love to me. He just…tickles me. I hate it because he is so much stronger, I can't seem to escape, and I don't want to, because I am only pretending to be annoyed, and my giggles and screams are loud in the morning air.

"Shhh… you'll scare the birds away, and the squirrels and the…." He says, but I kiss him. As soon as he relaxes into it, I tickle him, but he's impervious. The bastard.

And now I'm holding him, his body over mine, his head resting at the crook of my neck. The ground is cold, but I'm warm, and Jacob is warmer. His waist is between my thighs, but it's not sexual, for once. _He_ tells _me _things now, about the first time he phased, about when he was little and Sarah, his mother, was alive, and because I ask and I tell him it's okay, he tells me about when he used to be in love with Bella.

But there's something nagging at the back of my mind. Something that isn't right. The sky is a light pink now, shot with clouds. The wolf is still howling.

Oh. The wolf.

"Jacob," I say.

"Mmmm?"

"Is that one of us?"

His eyes snap open and he rolls over, staring up at the sky. "Oh, shit."

* * *

By the time we get back to La Push it's too late. We don't know who it was, which of Sam's wolves. Probably on a patrol, since Sam still thinks we need patrols. Or maybe it was more than one of them. Hell, maybe it was Sam himself. I'd been hearing it or them off in the distance for a long time, but I hadn't noticed. It didn't seem strange that wolves would be howling. Jake was all I could think about.

_Together or separate? _I think.

_Shit, I don't know. Who do you think knows? I mean, we don't even know if whoever that was will tell anyone_. _It could have been an actual wolf, though, too, I mean…_

We throw on our clothes and run out of the forest. We're right near my house and I can see my mom and Seth in the kitchen, having coffee. It must be about 7 am—my mom is up for work, but what the hell is Seth doing awake?

Oh, Christ, my mom. I need to go tell her right now before anyone else does. I tell Jake what I am doing and he says, "I'll go with you."

"You should go tell your dad."

"Still, maybe she will freak out less if we're both there…"

"Do you really want to be in the room when I tell my mother we're dating? Go find your dad."

I open the door and my mom and Seth both look at me. "Honey, you have twigs in your hair," my mom says, before I get a chance to speak. I reach up and grab one hurriedly.

"Mom" I say, "I'm dating Jacob, and I know that—"

"I know, Leah. Sit down. Have some coffee," she says. Why is she so calm? "Your brother and I have just been talking about it."

I glare at Seth. The little traitor. How dare he tell her?

"Don't look at him like that. Leah," my mom says. "I asked him about it."

"Who told you then?"

"Quil. After the meeting last night."

"…oh." My stomach rumbles and Seth pushes a box of Lucky Charms at me.

"Use a bowl, please," says Mom.

"I was going to," honestly, what sort of person does she think I am? I sit down at the kitchen table and start eating.

"He seemed very happy. Quil, I mean. But I don't think it was for the right reasons." She's watching me over her coffee with one of those mom-looks on her face.

"Mmmmhmmm" I say around my cereal. Concentrate on the cereal, Leah, don't think about how awkward this all is.

She reaches out and puts her hand on my wrist. I look at it. In general, I don't really like being touched. But it's my mom. "Leah, I want you to be happy. Are you happy?"

I nod and swallow my cereal. "Yeah."

"Does being with Jacob make you happy?"

I nod again.

"I told her that. I told her he was nice to you and that I like him better than I ever liked Sam because Sam is a jerk and Jake is one of the best people I know," says Seth. Ok, someone needs to take his coffee away. Of all the people who should _not_ have caffeine.

"Leah," my mom says, pressing her hand tight against my wrist. "Quil was talking to me and Billy about how good this would be for our Tribe and what a good mach this is, and Billy said that were a nice girl, and if you could keep his son away from Bella's daughter he'd be even happier, but I don't care about that. I just want you to be happy. So tell me the truth, are you happy?"

"Yes, mom. "I swallow my cereal. "Wait, Billy said I was a nice girl?"

"Not those exact words." She puts down her coffee slowly and asks me again, "are you happy?"

She's watching me like she expects me to gush about how great Jake is. What would I tell her? That we've spent two nights together as lovers and that when we make love I can't think about anything else, and that when he's inside me I stop thinking of it as "making love" and only think of how much I want him, how much I want more, more, deeper, how _words_ come out of my mouth and I tell him not to stop and worse but it doesn't matter because finally I am _not thinking_ and that's what matters?

That when he and I are wrapped up in each other's arms falling asleep I'm, yes, happy? That as nervous as am, I'm know that safe? That La Push and everything else seems like a dream, something else far away that doesn't really matter because being with Jake is the only thing I care about? That the only thing that could hurt me now would be losing him?

That it's not just about wanting sex, that I miss him when he's not with me, that I think I may actually care about his opinion more than I care about anyone else's, and that scares me, because when I phased the first time I vowed not to care what anyone thought, ever? That even after Bella chose a _leech_ over him, he still smiles easily, as easily as Seth does, but differently, because his eyes show more. That he doesn't have Seth's need for approval nor Sam's absolute certainty that he's right but that's what I like about him, that he acts like he doesn't care about rules but I know that he doesn't want to hurt anyone, ever, and he questions himself all the time?

That yes, I like him, I really, really, really like him, and that I'm scared I might just like him more than he likes me, because that's how it was with Sam, and I'm scared that Jacob will leave me for Nessie, in fact, I _believe _that he will but at the same time, I know that he won't. But when we are together I don't care because just having him with me makes me feel pretty and beautiful and feminine and all the things I haven't felt since I phased—all the things that he whispers to me that I am?

So I just look at my mom and smile and say, "Yes. He makes me happy."

And she smiles back and says "Good."

And then we start talking about the other thing the Council met about. Her and Charlie. I'd be offended that my mother hasn't let me have more to do with her wedding, but she hasn't let _anyone _have anything to do with it. Charlie is such an unbelievably low-key guy, and apparently he hates big parties. And Mom doesn't want to make a fuss since "we've both been married before" and she's always been a very practical woman. Before the engagement, though, she sat both me and Seth down and talked to us for a long time about it. Seth said, "Honestly, mom, it's not like you need to ask our permission!"

She's set a date. It's soon, less than two months. Soon enough that no one will have time to, in my mother's words, "make a big production out of it." She says she'd get married at home, but the Council won't let her.

Because Charlie's daughter isn't allowed on our land. So they are getting married in a park near Forks.

But she tells me now what the other Elders said. She's an Elder too, but that means she has to follow the laws very strictly. She and Charlie have set the guest list and since they are marrying off La Push, no one can say anything. Bella and I will be bridesmaids along with a few of my mom's friends ("It's silly having bridesmaids at my age!") and, get this, Charlie is going to ask Seth, Edward and Jacob to be groomsmen. Because apparently Charlie is the VP of Seth's Jake fan club. Billy, too, and one of Charlie's work friends. (It's shocking that Forks has more than one cop.) Nessie is going to be the flower girl.

The part that is really going to shock people is this: They're inviting all the Cullens. I suppose they have to, since they are Charlie's in-laws. And Charlie apparently is insisting, since he really likes Dr. Cullen. And guess who else is being invited? Sam and Emily. Mom talked it over with the other Elders and they agreed that was best. A little show of unity during Jake and Sam's struggle. I bet his whole pack comes along as body guards to protect his pregnant wife from the big, scary leeches.

Most of what the Council talked about, Mom tells us, was what will happen after the wedding. Charlie's going to sell his house and move to La Push. Mom can't really live off the Rez since she's an Elder, and Charlie sort of needs to be here. Because in a few days, he's going to a meeting of the Council and Quil Ateara is going to explain to him exactly what sort of family his daughter married into, and apparently the Lord High Vamps in Italy or Greece or Transylvania or wherever the hell don't like their little secret getting around. .

But they aren't going to live in our house. Charlie and Mom are getting a new one. A smaller one, I guess, or maybe just one that didn't belong to Charlie and Renee (I know her name because someone had to explain to me why Bella thought "Renesmee" was an okay thing to name a child) or, probably more important, to my mom and my dad. Symbolic of their new life together. I wonder what Charlie thinks about marrying his friend's widow.

I'm glad to hear Billy's going to be in the wedding party, though. I know he didn't really approve of them dating.

"Oh man, mom, you're selling our childhood home?" Seth says.

"I was thinking of renting it. The money from selling Charlie's house will be enough to pay for the new one."

"I don't want to move!" he says. Oh my god, what a whiner. I elbow him.

"I don't want you to move, either. You're too old to be living with your mother," says Mom.

"You are kicking me out? I can't get an apartment! I can't leave yet, I still have to be a wolf!"

"You could always move in with the leeches," I say. Mom shivers.

"Oh, would they let me? That'd be so awesome! Jake could move in, too! Then he and Edward and I could hang out all the time! And Embry could come over and play Halo on the Cullens' giant TV!"

"Please, stop," says my mother. "How you can stand being around them I will never understand. The smell alone is enough to whither an onion."

"They think we smell bad, too," says Seth.

"They think I smell less bad than you and Jake, though," I say.

"Leah, honey, that's not really much of an accomplishment. Your brother is kind of smelly."

"No I'm not!"

"Your room _is_ pretty revolting," I say.

"Anyway," Mom says, in a tone that implies she's changing the subject. "You obviously weren't listening. You don't need to move."

"But you're renting the house!" says Seth.

"To you, if you want it. I guess you will have to get a job so you can afford it. No more sitting around playing Halo all day. You, either, young lady," she says to me. "If you two are too busy being wolves to go to college right now, then that's find. But you don't seem to be accidentally phasing anymore so I expect you to get jobs."

"Oh man, can I really have the house?"

"No, 'man,'" says my mom. "you cannot. You can _rent_ it from me. Along with your sister. And I imagine you'll ask Embry and Quil, too, since I know for a fact that Quil's mother is about to strangle him for being 22 years old and doing nothing around the house and spending all this time with Claire. Honestly, I am about to tell the poor woman myself about the phasing, but Elders can't mess around with Alpha commands. Leah, tell Jake that when he beats Sam, the first thing he has to do is lift the command on not telling families."

"Quil's in our pack, so really, he could tell," says Seth.

"He's scared of Sam," I say. "And Jacob never really told him one way or the other what to do."

"Oh! Jake! Can he move in, too?" asks Seth excitedly. "This is going to be so awesome."

"The more of you there are, the easier it's going to be for you to pay your rent. But I expect you to keep the house nice, you know. Yes, I thought you'd want Jacob, but I knew Billy was okay with him living at home still, and I didn't think we'd have enough bedrooms for all five of you." She looks at me and adds, "But I guess that won't be a problem. You know, in my day, we didn't have premarital sex."

"Didn't you?" I say. "Carlisle and Esme did." It's the only thing I can think of to say that will deflect from the awkwardness.

"Really?" says Seth, scandalized.

"Yeah, after they were engaged."

"Are you and Jake engaged?" snaps my mom.

"No."

"Exactly."

"Would it make you feel better if I told you Jacob didn't pop my cherry?" I say.

Mom closes her eyes and shakes her head. "Don't use that kind of coarse language, please. And no, it doesn't make me feel better."

"I hate Sam!" says Seth, pouring himself another bowl of Luck Charms, says, "Oh! When Jake and Quil and Embry come over to talk about the Council, I can tell them about the house!" I wonder what time Jake'll be over. Leah, where were you last night? I went to wake you up like 10 minutes ago so you could come talk to us but you weren't there."

I blush and choke on some of the marshmallows from the cereal.

"Um, I went running."

"Oh, was it fun? Did you see anyone? Did you see Jake?" Thank god my brother is so naive.

"Yes. Um, incidentally, I think Sam's pack might know."

* * *

That was the first eventful thing to happen today—telling my mother. The second is happening now. The other pack knows.

It was Kevin in the forest. At least I think that's his name. He's one of the boys in the other pack, the ones who phased too young. He was on patrol, of course. And he smelled us. I don't know what he knows, what he saw, but probably just me sprawled across Jake's chest.

Kevin is Paul's brother. Kevin, all full of shock, told Paul. Paul told Sam.

Apparently Sam is pissed. I know this because Jacob calls me that morning about ten to tell me that everyone knows. His dad knew from Quil Sr., just like my mom. But then Jacob saw Jared, and Jared said, "Holy shit, dude, is it true you're screwing Leah?" Jacob apparently didn't like Jared talking about me like that and punched him in the stomach. Two of the other of Sam's wolves that I don't know, I think one is named Doug… anyway, they dragged Jared away to Sam's territory before he could hit Jacob back and give Jacob an excuse to thoroughly kick his ass.

Now, Jacob is in my living room, pacing around. "Leah, what the hell is wrong with me that I can't control my temper?"

"You're Alpha," I say in what I hope is a soothing voice. "That's what you are supposed to do."

"That, or she's rubbing off on you," says Seth. "Wait, Jake, you said they took Jared back to Sam's territory? Um, so what's the deal with this territory thing? Where am I not allowed to go?" God, Dweeb, don't hassle him right now! Then again, maybe he's just asking stupid questions to distract Jacob. I could do a better job distracting him, though. Okay, what's wrong with _me_ that _I _can't control _my_self?

Jacob pauses his pacing. "Oh. That. Yeah, you can go anywhere you want. It's just me and Sam, basically, to keep us from fighting each other or each other's packs. Apparently the Elders think that when we fight it has to be special or something. They don't want anyone interrupting it again. But you should probably stay out of the houses of his pack and especially his, since that's where his territory is centered. Just as long as you don't go roll in his front lawn you should be fine. "

"Where's your territory?" Seth asks.

"Leah's bed," says Embry from the doorway. He's apparently just gotten here. See, he never knocks.

Seth coughs awkwardly and sort of blushes. I fight the urge to punch Embry in the face. Thank god we're not in wolf form, because thinking about Jacob and my bed together isn't really something I want all my pack to see. Jake just ignores him and answers Seth's question.

"My house. Your house, Embry's, Quil's, the area between our houses, and part of the forest. Especially all of the forest between La Push and the leeches' house."

I let out a snorting sort of laugh. Of course they gave him that territory.

"So I heard Sam is freaking out," says Embry, leaning obnoxiously in the doorway to the living room.

"This is retarded," I mutter. "Who the hell cares?"

"Just fight him already!" Seth says suddenly. "Jake, you have to! Then he won't be able to say anything or make anyone do anything ever! And you _are _the rightful Alpha."

Jacob just sort of sighs and stares at the floor. "I'd have to take his pack though."

"So? You're a great Alpha!"

I think Jacob is about to argue with my brother about it, but the door to my house smashes open and hits the wall. Hard. Huh. We all startle and Jacob is already in a fighting stance (expecting Sam or Paul or Jared or someone to be sneakily attacking?)

It's Quil, though. He storms into the room and gives Jacob the Quil Look of Death. "What the fuck, Jacob?"

"Hey, Quil, you startled me," Jake says, his voice low but friendly. Like he's trying to calm him down. Oh, right. Quil _would _be pissed, wouldn't he?

"How the fuck can you do that to her?" Quil practical screams.

"Shut up, dumbass," I say, "I can make my own damn decisions!"

"Not you," he snaps. "Nessie. Jake, how can you do this to Nessie?"

"Nessie is a child," Jake's voice is low and dangerous. He's leaning toward Quil. Maybe he'll break his nose like he did Embry. But Jacob doesn't actually look like he wants to fight anyone.

"She's your imprint!"

"Yes. And I adore her very much."

"So much that you're fucking Leah?"

Jacob's eyes narrow. "Don't you start. You're my friend. Don't you talk about it like that."

"That's what it is, Jake! You can't love Leah!"

Ok, is it just me, or did this suddenly get very, very awkward? Pick a spot on the floor, Leah, and stare at it.

"Don't you presume to tell me—"

"No! I followed you from Sam's pack! Phasing was one of the best things that ever happened to me besides imprinting! And I split with all the other wolves over you, because I realized that you loved Nessie like I love Claire and—"

"Shut up," says Embry. He's moved away from the doorway since Quil came in, and now he's leaning against the armrest of the sofa. His arms are crossed and he's glaring at Quil. "The reason you loved phasing so much is because you got to be friends with me and Jake again. Don't act like you owe Sam anything. And your grandfather baked you a fucking cake when you left for Jake's pack. If you haven't noticed, he seems pretty into this whole Alpha-by-blood thing."

"You shut up," Quil snaps. What are they, third graders? "We're practically outcasts—"

"We are not!" my brother says defensively.

"Yes, we are. But I _knew _you didn't have a choice about being a leech lover because of Nessie, but now you act like imprinting means nothing."

Jacob takes a step forward. "That's not fair, Quil. Imprinting means a lot to me. I love Nessie very much, and I adore her utterly. But not like _that_."

"You will, though, when she's older."

"Quil, you are so lucky not to have been arrested," mutters Embry. Actually, that's pretty funny. I try unsuccessfully not to laugh. Oops.

"Shut up! It isn't like that!" Quil shouts. Oooooh, someone's a bit touchy.

"Exactly. It isn't like that," says Jake.

"Nessie's a little kid, of course Jake's going to hook up with Leah right now," Embry says.

"That's not actually helping, Embry," Jacob tells him. Yeah, really.

This is starting to get to me. "Can you all _not_ talk about me like I'm not here?"

"Leah, everyone knows you're just doing this because of Sam!" Quil says. Okay, that crossed the line.

"Quil, you do not want to piss me off right now," I say, "This has _nothing _to do with Sam!"

"Or Nessie!" adds Jacob.

"You're such a fucking hypocrite, dude," Embry tells Quil.

"What the hell? No, I am not."

"Like you've never looked at a hot girl and been like—"

"No! I have not! Not since I imprinted!"

"Really?" Embry raises and eyebrow.

"Yes!" Quil yells. "That's what imprinting _is_."

"So the hottest woman alive could walk past you naked and you wouldn't get a—" Embry starts to say, but Seth cuts him off.

"Guys! My sister is in the room!"

"Your sister knows quite a lot about that, I would imagine."

"Did you just call me a slut?" I ask.

"You said it, not me," he tells me, but he's almost smiling and I know he's joking. Not that I like being called that. But I guess to him it's just a variation on our bitch/bastard argument. The jackass.

"Quil, listen," says Jacob. "Obviously I don't know how things are for you and Claire. But I still think about sex, okay?" At that, Seth looks even more uncomfortable. Yeah, this is a really awkward conversation. Maybe Quil and Jacob could go in another room, or, and here's a wild thought, not even talk about this. "I'm not just with Leah to kill time, okay? She's my girlfriend. And this has nothing to do with Nessie. Nessie isn't upset. She doesn't care."

That sort of makes me wonder what exactly Nessie said to Jacob about us. I haven't really seen the little Spawn alone since Jake came home. She hasn't shown me any pictures of like her grinning while Jake and I make out or whatever.

"Wait, you guys are dating?"

"Yeah," Jacob says.

Quil chews his lip. Wait, so he really honestly thought we were just having random sex? Yeah, because _that_ would be great for pack unity.

"But…" Quil starts to say, but Jacob interrupts him.

"Look, I adore Nessie. But so does everyone else. Nessie has more love and affection and worship in her life than one person should be able to stand. Do you remember once when we talked about you first imprinting on Claire, and your grandfather said that usually in cases like this, it's hard for the girl to resist that kind of attention? Well, in Nessie's case, I don't think that's an issue. It doesn't mean I love her any less."

Quil doesn't say anything, and Jacob takes a deep breath and continues. "It's not just about that, though. I need to be my own person. I spent enough time being Bella's second choice and I have no desire to follow Nessie around for the rest of, literally, eternity, like a pathetic little….well, like a puppy."

I sort of laugh at that. It reminds me of Bella and Edward.

"So you're telling me that what you like about Leah is that she's a bitch," Quil says.

"No, what I like about Leah is that she doesn't need me."

No one says anything to that, least of all me. What am I supposed to say? First of all, they insist on talking about me as if I'm not there. Second of all….ugh. I can't deal with this stupid boy stuff any more.

"Can we talk about something else now?" Seth asks. It's things like that that make me remember that we are somewhat related.

* * *

So I guess Jake and Quil are friends again. Quil is being all awkward and avoiding me though. The guys all went off to, I don't know, play Halo in someone else's house. No one knows quite what to do. I think they are all expecting me to go over to Sam's house and explain myself or something.

Screw that. I don't own Sam anything.

So instead I'm going to see the leeches.

Rosalie and Esme are coming out of the forest on the other side of the house when I get there. "I'll leave you girls alone to talk," says Esme, before disappearing into the house (to do what?).

"Nice morning for a hike?" I ask Rosalie. She rolls her eyes.

"At least I'm not covered in blood."

"Fair enough. How many little woodland creatures did you orphan this time?"

"Wait, tell me again what you ate in Canada?"

"Touché."

"So did you find out what happened at the meeting?"

"Yeah. Basically nothing. But I got some."

"At the meeting?"

"Yes, while I was watching that horrible movie with you and your family, I was also _simultaneously_ having sex at the meeting."

She shrugs. "I don't know what the hell kind of weird werewolf powers you have. Aside from your charming smell."

"Yeah, anyway, so then everyone found out and now they're all pissed."

"Everyone being Sam?"

"Quil's not happy either, but Jacob managed to calm him down," I say.

"Which one is Quil? Is he the pedophile one?"

"Aha. Exactly. So you see the problem."

"Tell Jake to kick his ass. Isn't that what Alphas do?" We start walking into the house and sit in the freakishly large room that serves no purpose whatsoever. "So I'm on your side, anyway."

"What side?" asks Jasper, looking up from his paper (aha! Three times! I was right! That is all he does!) in the corner all the way across the room.

"I have an idea. Maybe you could mind your own business," I tell him.

"Oooh brilliant suggestion, Dog, since my business is so much more interesting than yours."

"You know, your use of sarcasm in that sentence sort of implies that you actually agree that your life sucks compared to mine. Aha."

"Oh, no, was that another or your sad little vampire puns?" he asks.

"Can we get t-shirts?" Rosalie asks. Talk about a non-sequitur.

"What?"

"You know, we could all get "I support Jacob and Leah" shirts!"

"And then what, wear them around the perimeter of La Push and piss everyone off as much as possible?" asks Jasper. "Wait, that could actually have some potential. Alice! Come in here!" he calls loudly.

In half a second she is there. "Yes?"

"Rosalie is making shirts for Leah and Jacob. You should design them."

"Why do Jacob and Leah need shirts?" asks Alice.

"No, shirts for us that show our support of their relationship," Rosalie clarifies. Alice gives me a very penetrating stare.

"Who knows?" she asks.

"Basically the entire Rez."

"I'm sorry."

I shrug. "Whatever."

"We could write 'Team Dog' on the shirts," says Jasper, seeming to get into the idea.

"Don't call Leah a dog, it's offensive. Jacob, yes. Leah, no," says Rosalie.

"We could make them in all different colors!" Alice is saying.

"We are not making shirts," I mutter. Honestly. I don't know why they find this all so fascinating. Actually, I asked Rosalie about this once, and she said it's because they are all happily married and they haven't had anyone to gossip about since the Loveleeches, and even then, that wasn't so interesting. Rosalie said that at least Jacob and I were having sex and not just cuddling or whatever it was that Edward and Bella were doing. Actually, her exact words were, 'and he used to go over and hold her every night,' which actually to me sounds a tiny bit creepy.

I don't know what I would do if I found out a boy was watching me sleep. I don't mind the thought of Jacob doing it, it's kind of sweet actually… but that's assuming I've invited him there. If I opened my eyes one night and there was some guy I barely knew watching me, I think I'd castrate him. Anyway, the point is that I can understand why Bella and Edward weren't so much fun to gossip about.

Still, do they really need to make shirts?

Alice is still talking about colors. It seems to trigger a thought in her, because she turns to me, all full of authority, and says, "Are you sure they won't let me _at least_ do the decorations?" she asks.

"Wait, what?" I ask.

"I just said, Leah, that speaking of colors, your mom and Charlie should let me do the decorations for their wedding! I would do such a good job! Just ask Edward or Bella! And I've planned lots of Rosalie and Emmett's weddings too!"

I shake my head. "I don't think that would go over well, what with you being the enemy. People are going to be mad enough that you're even coming."

"Mad enough that they'll forget you're going to bed with Jacob?" asks Jasper.

"Going to bed with? I'm not sure that that's what I'd call it," I snap. "But then again, you are about a million years old so yes. He's even seen my _ankles_."

Jasper sighs. "For the record, that's the Victorians. I am not a Victorian. You are confusing me with Edward, who is basically a Victorian. Born just a bit too late."

Meanwhile, Alice is pouting. "Well, then can I plan _your_ wedding?" she asks.

"Oh my god. What is it with you people being obsessed with marriage?"

"When you say 'you people,' I find that you are needlessly stereotyping vampires," says Jasper.

"Well, Edward said I'd get a car for my wedding present," I tell him. "And now Alice has brought it up."

"Didn't we just establish that Edward is a Victorian? Or possibly even a puritan? Anyway, I think it should be clear to you that vampires don't approve of sinning," says Jasper, rolling his eyes. "Under any circumstances."

"Right. I remember that. You guys are big on crosses and holy water too, aren't you?" I ask.

"Don't get married yet," Rosalie tells me. Gee, thanks. Because I was so planning on it. "Seriously. The pre-martial sex I have with Emmett is always the best."

"Haven't you and Emmett been married five like times now?" I ask.

She nods. "Yeah, but right before we get married, we always pretend we aren't married, obviously, and the sex is amazing."

"But you _are_ married. I'm sure Emmett's ringlets are just as womanly before the weddings as after," says Jasper. I just roll my eyes at Rosalie. She's always bragging about her sex life to me. Actually, it used to bother me a lot more when I wasn't getting any.

"So the decorations! We could have it themed with white roses, and we could get crystal vases and then crystal goblets and everything would sparkle!" Alice is saying. Poor Alice. But I will be damned if my mother lets her near her wedding.

And I can't imagine my mother getting married somewhere that _sparkles. _Or Charlie. Ha.

They might as well just elope to get away from all their monster kids.

* * *

On the morning of the second day after the entire world discovered that in my spare time I'm making love to Jacob Black, there is a knock at my door. But it's not Sam or anyone trying to confront me about my relationship.

I open the door.

It's a man carrying a bouquet of flowers. He hands them to me after I tell him that yes, I'm Leah Clearwater. My first thought is "How romantic!" Sam gave me flowers once, red roses, right after we started dating. Not for Valentine's Day or for my birthday, but just to say he liked me. I thought it was incredibly sweet. I'd hung them upside down in my closet until they dried and then kept them in a vase on my desk. Later, when he was ignoring me (because he was phasing all the time, but no one bothered to tell me), I'd lay in bed and remind myself about those flowers. Proof that he loved me. Even though I'd put them in a box under my bed when he'd cut my heart out, I'd never thrown them out. But looking at the flowers that Jake sent me, I know I'll throw Sam's pathetic, shriveled, dead ones away.

But the flowers aren't from Jacob. Attached to the vase is a card. It says, "Thank you. –Billy."

I put the flowers on the kitchen table. They look beautiful.

* * *

On the afternoon of Day Two, I help my mother send out wedding invitations to the select few. Apparently Charlie is trying to convince her to go to the Cullen's' with him. But he hasn't heard everything explain yet. That particular meeting is going to be in two nights. Then we'll see if he's so keen to have my mother in a house full of vampires.

Mom goes ahead and addresses Emily and Sam's invitation. She's making small talk as she does it, to take away from the awkwardness. "When's she due?" she asks me.

I shrug. As if I care when stupid Emily is going to have her stupid baby. God damned breeders. "I don't know. I think she's like four and half or five months pregnant."

"I saw her the other day. She looked _very _pregnant," mom says. "I wasn't that far along when you were at four and a half months. Nor your brother, but he was smaller than you when he was born."

"Yeah, well, Seth's a runt."

"I wonder if Emily's baby will be tall like Sam? Maybe that's why she looks so big."

"Or maybe she's about ready to give birth. No one even knows when she got pregnant."

"They still haven't seen a doctor?"

"Yeah, because doctors love it when you come in with a werewolf cub in your uterus. You know, it happens every day."

Mom says nothing. She must realize I don't like talking about this. Since I am infertile and all. And she's used to be being a bitch all the time, too. Instead she reaches for another invitation to address.

"How's Jacob?" she asks.

"Eh, don't know," I mutter. I haven't heard from him today. Maybe he's off having a fight with Sam about me. One can only hope. Maybe even as I address this invitation Jacob is eating Sam's kidney.

Although if they were fighting, it'd probably be over territory or Jacob's fondness for our natural blood-enemy rather than me. Goddamned Sam. How dare he be angry! Or at least, everyone is saying he's angry. I don't actually know how he feels. Seriously. Why do he and his stupid, oversized pack care so much? Maybe they are shocked that Jake would want someone as allegedly unfeminine as the world's only female werewolf. Sam should, quite honestly, be beside himself with glee that at least Jake isn't wearing a True-Love-Waits-For-Its-Imprint-To-Grow-Up ring.

Or is he mad that I'm finally getting with someone? When he broke up with me, it was after I'd seen the way he looked at Emily, and I _knew_ he was leaving me for her. He'd acted like I could never understand, like the love he felt for her was so much greater than anything someone like me could appreciate, but of course that's exactly what he thought, since he'd oh wow, imprinted. Everyone in Sam's pack was always thinking about how perfect they were together (it's actually kind of pathetic when a bunch of teenage guys are reflecting on The Meaning of Love) and how they complete each other, and how they hoped they'd meet girls they could look at like he looks at her. Because supposedly you only look at your imprint that way.

Which is a lie, by the way, because Sam used to look at me like that too. Not at first, but after we'd been dating. He used to do it right before we had sex. It was actually kind of annoying because I'd be all ready and he'd stop and stare down at me with that weird intensity and whisper he loved me and _then_ while I was wondering what the hell that meant, then he'd start.

And now he thinks he's entitled to be angry that someone finally wants me? Did he expect me to sit around for the rest of my unnaturally long life and dream about him coming back to me? Actually, that's probably _exactly_ what he thought. I mean, I was sort of doing that a lot after I phased. It's not my fault, though. After I lost my dad I just wanted someone to hold me, but of course no one would.

He was there, actually. At my father's funeral. Of course he was, the Alpha attending an Elder's funeral. And he and my dad did always get along well, too well, actually. I was trying so hard not to cry, but everyone kept telling me and Seth how much our father loved us, and that was what made me cry, the thought that my father was a good man and a good father and he had loved me and I had been so ungrateful to him while I was alive and if it wasn't for me and my freaky wolfiness scaring him he might still be alive…

…I was standing there biting my lip and staring at the ground and Sam came over to me and told me he was sorry, and I knew he meant that he was sorry for my dad dying, but I wished he was sorry for everything else, too, for leaving me, and he wrapped his arms around me and pressed me against his chest, against his black coat, and I could smell him, then. He doesn't smell anything like Jacob—before I noticed Jake, I didn't realize there could be such a variation in men, but I suppose that just shows how naïve I was. But he smelled _masculine_ and he smelled like my first love, and at that point my only love, and because of the way he was holding me my face was pressed against his neck and without thinking (I swear to god I wasn't thinking) I pressed my lips to his neck and put my tongue against his skin.

I don't know why. Maybe I just wanted to taste him again, to remember what it was like. Maybe I wanted to make him remember that I was a woman, that we were once lovers, that once upon a time he'd hold me in his tiny bed and whisper to me that one day he'd marry me and we'd name our first child Harry Samuel Uley if it was a boy or if it was a girl we'd name her after our mothers.

Or maybe it's just because grief makes you do stupid things, ungodly stupid things, and I was dying inside because my father was gone and I just wanted Sam to fuck me one last time so I'd remember what it was like to be wanted by someone.

Of course the second I did it his back went rigid and he pushed me back and said, "Leah, I can't," and then he was gone. There's nothing quite like being scolded by your ex.

I wonder if I will ever feel comfortable enough with Jacob to tell him that. That's stupid, it's not like he'd care. It's not like he'd want to hear about me trying to seduce Sam.

So of course Sam thought I'd sit around wishing he was still mine until I die. Oh well. Sorry to disappoint.

And now all I can think about is that Sam has the same baby-naming strategy as _Bella_ and I honestly cannot remember why I wanted him so much.

But at least after I phased the first time I could why my dad acted that way after Sam and I broke up. I'd lay around on the sofa crying all day and my mom would pet my hair and my dad would honestly try to defend Sam to me, saying that he was a good kid, and that it wasn't his fault. Because my dad knew everything and I didn't. So and least now I can forgive my dad for that. But imprinted or no, Sam's still an authoritarian jackass.

My mom is looking at me, and I know she's been talking to me. I try to remember what she was saying, but I really wasn't listening.

"Sorry, what?"

"Honey, it's okay. We don' t have to talk about it if you don't want to," she says.

"No, seriously, what is it? I was tuning out. Sorry."

"I just asked what's going to happen when the half-br…Nessie, grows up."

"Oh." I stare at the invitation in my hands. It's the one for Carlisle and Esme. "Um, I don't know."

Mom nods. "I guess no one can know anything about the future, really."

"Jacob seems to think he does," I say, almost bitterly. I can't stand his certainty.

"Really?"

"He swears he won't ever love her like that."

She smiles, "Well, I think that's encouraging, isn't? That he doesn't think his feeling for you will change?" Mom seems so happy I can't bring myself to say what I'm thinking, which is 'So was Sam.'

* * *

But later that day, Jacob calls me. He asks if I'm free for dinner.

"What the hell, Jake, like a date?" I ask.

"….Uh….yeah?"

"I think we're a little past that."

"Leah, if you don't want to be seen in public with me then just—"

"Ugh, you are so annoying. No, that's not it. I just don't want you to think that you're obligated to take me to dinner—"

"This is called being nice. You should look into it. Will you have dinner with me?"

"Yeah, okay, fine," I say, as casually as possible. Inside I'm grinning. I haven't been on a date for years. Shit, what am I going to wear?

"What time should I pick you up?" he asks. Awww, it's like being in high school again!

"Uh, yeah, I think I can just walk to your house. Give me like half an hour or so?"

"Yeah, okay. See you, then," he says and we hang up.

Okay, seriously, what am I going to wear? This is kind of exciting. I want to look nice (hot) but not like I was trying too hard to look nice (hot.) Oooh, mom did laundry yesterday which means I have a pair of jeans that are all tight from the dryer. And I could wear them with a cute, simple black top that is flattering (shows off that I have breasts… unlike Bella…or Renesmee) but doesn't look like I spent hours figuring out what to wear. Casual but sexy. Okay. Good. I even throw on some eyeliner. And the shoes, of course. Nothing says casual but sexy like giant purple pumps with jeans. And this way I'll be taller so I can kiss Jacob more easily.

* * *

When I knock on his door, Billy shouts that I should just come in. Apparently Jacob is getting ready or something (talk about role-reversal.)

"Thank you for the flowers," I say awkwardly. I'm sort of worried he's going to say, "Thank you for doing my son" but he doesn't.

Instead he says, "I was hoping you'd like them."

"Yep."

Awkward pause. I fidget with my purse and reapply lip gloss unnecessarily.

"You aren't using birth control, are you?" he asks suddenly. What. The. Hell?! My mouth falls open. He's clearly waiting for a response.

"Um…..yeh…." I sort of mumble.

"Yes you are or yes you aren't?"

"….."

"So you are? Kids today are so responsible. You need to stop, though. Just tell him you are taking your pills and then don't."

"..." I finally get control of myself and say, "…I don't…ovulate."

"Oh, right, so not pills. Of course. Okay, this is what you are going to have to do. Steal the…um…things….away from Jacob and then use a pin to poke holes in them."

"…." Lost the ability to speak again.

"Yes, I am aware you don't get your period. Believe me, we've talked about it in the Council," Yeah, just when I thought this couldn't get any more awkward. But he's still talking. "but you may have an egg lurking around somewhere from before and if you could just get pregnant that way then Jacob, well, he's an honorable boy, he'd marry you."

"…." What is it with Jake and Billy thinking women have random eggs lurking around inside them? Where the hell did that idea come from?

"And then I'd have nice little pureblood grandchildren and never have to worry about anything in my old age, and with my condition."

"…." Mouth is still open. Words still not coming. Did he seriously just tell me what I think he did? Billy is insane.

"I heard Sam is angry," he says. I nod a frantic 'yes,' not because I want to talk about Sam, but because it's a change of subject and anything is better than Billy's Condom With Holes scheme.

"He's projecting."

"Uh?" Yeah, I'm super eloquent right now.

"He's angry because he's projecting. When he imprinted, Sam spent many hours with the Elders listening to stories about imprinting. Trying to tell himself over and over again that he did nothing wrong."

I don't say anything. I mean, the whole bitter-ex-girlfriend thing is so overdone.

"And now Jacob has done something which he could not do. He is convinced that he had no choice about hurting you because as a wolf, he must be with his imprint. And now my son is going against everything that wolves with imprints are supposed to do. But Sam will not react well to this. He will tell you that Jacob will leave you for his imprint. But that is why I have thought of this solution for you! Jacob would never abandon the mother of his child!"

And that's when Jacob walks in. He looks hot. I mean, _hot_. He's wearing actual jeans. Not cut-offs. Jeans that go down to his feet. Dark denim. Sort of artfully faded. And like some kind of button-up shirt. Long sleeved. Nice without being metrosexual. His hair is loose over his shoulders. It's been 48 hours since I've had him and I suddenly want him. Now.

"Hey, what are you guys talking about?" he asks.

"The Mariners," says Billy.

"Yeah, right. Go Ichiro!" Jacob says, rolling his eyes. "Leah, you look nice," he adds and sort of almost blushes. Never mind high school, this is like middle school.

"You kids have fun! I won't wait up!" Billy calls as we're leaving.

"Where are we going?" I ask.

"Haven't decided. We could always go to the one restaurant on the Rez and eat seafood," he suggests, smiling.

"Yeah, and make out across the table and piss everyone off?"

"Leah, I am not going to act like I've done something wrong or that I have something to be ashamed of, and I would appreciate it if you wouldn't, either."

"I'm not ashamed. We can totally eat on the Rez."

"I was joking, though. We should at least go to Forks," Jacob says as he climbs into the driver's side of his Rabbit. I get in, too.

"Forks, the dining capital of the world."

"Port Angeles isn't too far," he says.

"Oooh, now you're getting all fancy!"

"We'd make better time if I had thought to borrow the Ferrari. It'd be nicer, too," he says, gesturing around the inside of the car.

"Jacob," I say, putting my hand on his forearm. "This is _your_ car and I like it. Better than anything you could have borrowed from the leeches."

* * *

AN: Chapter five! Ta da! Hopefully now you will believe that I have no intention of abandoning this fic! Coming soon: Charlie and Sue tie the knot, Leah gasp talks to Sam, and remember how Nessie is so convinced she needs to go to school?...

Remember to review!


	6. Chapter 6

The restaurant we finally go to in Port Angeles is nice

AN: Hello again! Thank you so much to all the wonderful people who have been reviewing! It really makes me happy!

And since apparently the Leah/Jacob lovin' shows up every-other chapter, yes, it's that time again, so just skip it of you don't want to read about that sort of thing.

X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X

The restaurant we finally go to in Port Angeles is nice. Very nice. But not like creepy weird nice. Not too romantic. It's by the water, and we can look out and see boats in the marina in the moonlight. Okay, I am making it sound really tragically romantic. It's not, though!

And I can't even look at the stupid boats because all I want to look at is Jacob. Bella told me once that one of her favorite things about Edward is his smile—apparently she thinks she sort of smiles with one side of his mouth or something. She called it "crooked." To me it sounded kind of annoying. A half smile is what _I _give, when I am mocking someone. But Jacob doesn't smile like that. He just grins at me from across the table. And seeing him happy makes me happy, makes me want to make him more happy. Makes me want to say something funny and have him laugh. Makes me hope that he's just as captivated by me as I am by him.

We could have eaten on the Rez, of course. It really wouldn't have pissed anyone off except for Sam's pack, and let's be honest, I don't exactly care what they think. There are seventeen wolves at La Push, and aside from them, a few imprint-girlies and assorted families (Claire's mom—am I the only one who finds it odd that Claire's mom knows why her daughter and Quil are so close, but Quil's mom doesn't?) and the Elders, no one knows about us. Or if they notice we're dating, they won't think anything by it. Well, that's not entirely true. The entire Rez knows that I'm Sam's Bitter Ex-girlfriend. And most people know that there's something going on with Sam and Jacob hating each other, and that Jacob is always with the Cullens, who everyone at La Push _has_ to hate, even if they don't know why. But they don't know about the added wolf-drama level, or the Cullen complication. I have a feeling we'd get looked at by most people, noticed, that sort of thing… but Sam's pack would probably just sit there giving us evils.

That's not why we decided to eat off the Rez. Jake said we should have a "proper date." I almost hyperventilated.

We have seafood. That's sort of what you do in the Pacific Northwest. My foot brushes against his under the table and I try not to blush. I can't tell if we're flirting or not. I mean, we're being friendly, but then, we are friends. And I'm smiling like an idiot, but that's because he's so hot that I smile just looking at him. We aren't even talking about anything important. It's not like one of us is telling the other our life story. It's just sort of…chatting.

But as he moves in his chair, I know how his muscles are moving under his shirt, and I want him.

I just don't want him to think that's all I want. So I don't brush my hand against his when he reaches for a roll, and I don't hold eye contact with him too long, and I don't giggle too much and stick my chest out.

We just chat. Until he says, in a complete change of subject, "Leah, can I ask you something?"

"Um… yes?" See, I am being nice. If it were anyone other than Jake, I would have said, 'I don't know, can you?'

"What's it going to take for you to believe that I'm not going to leave you for Nessie?"

This got serious fast. I swallow my scallop. I want to change the subject. Make a joke. Insult the leeches. But instead I answer him seriously. I even make eye contact. "When you don't."

"What?" he asks.

"I will believe you that you won't leave me for her when you don't leave me for her," I say and take another bite.

He bites his lip and looks at me. "Thank you for being honest," he finally says. I don't think that was the answer he was looking for. Maybe I _should_ have lied.

Neither of us says anything. Damn it, why did he have to go and ask stupid questions? Why did I have to go and answer?

"I want to talk to her," I say suddenly. The sort of thing you don't realize you're thinking until the words have left your mouth.

He doesn't pretend that he doesn't know what I'm talking about. "She'd like that."

"Whenever I've been over there, she hasn't been around," I say.

"Yeah… she's got a lot on her mind."

I want to ask if it's about us. That's arrogant, though, isn't it? Assuming that if she's got something on her mind, of course it's about us. So I don't ask. But he hears the question anyway.

"Not just about us."

"Just?"

He looks down at his dinner. Well, his empty plate. Werewolves eat quickly. "I told you. _She _told you. She isn't upset about us."

"Yeah, she said that, before you got back."

"Right. I know. You guys were getting close—"

I interrupt because now I'm feeling guilty. "I haven't not talked to her because of you, it's because of all the stuff with the packs—"

"I know. And she's got a lot on her mind. I mean it, it's not just about us. The only reason we're involved at all, is, well, it's easier if I just explain it. She's almost convinced them to let her go to school."

"What?" I thought they were going to wait until she was older, or something. "Just have her start going to middle school? Or as a freshman?"

"Yeah, basically. You were the one who told me about it to begin with, when I first came home."

"Right, but that was planned for the future…"

"The future comes pretty fast for Nessie." He drinks some of his water and chews his lip. "If they go through with it, like she wants, they are going to move."

"_What?!_"

He doesn't say it again though. I sigh.

"Wow… that would sort of fix some of the pack problems…" And then I remember what it was like last time the Cullens left, when Bella was so heart-broken that Sam had to come rescue her from the big, scary forest. We were all out partying. Lighting bonfires. Not that we really, truly knew what we were celebrating, well, except Sam and Jared. And Sam _was_ in a good mood. It was horrible, seeing him so happy, like how he was before he phased. The breakup wounds were still raw and I couldn't take my eyes off him, smiling at everyone around the fires. The girls who were my friends then were trying to get me to hit on Jared to cheer myself up. It didn't work.

"You think?" Jacob asks. Here and now. It's a better place to be than any of my memories of Sam.

"Well, if the leeches weren't here, then no one could accuse you of…" I let my voice trail off. What am I trying to say, anyway? I actually don't _want_ the leeches to leave. Not that I will admit it out loud, ever.

And I've just realized what this means for Jacob. "Would you be okay?" I ask.

He nods. "I left her to go to Canada." There's a lot unsaid in that sentence. That _he _left _her_ and now he doesn't want her leaving him? That she wouldn't be leaving if he hadn't done it first?

That he's been telling himself he hasn't hurt her and now he knows he has because it's hurting him to let her go?

But I don't want to think about any of those things. Instead, I say, "So you'll be okay." And I don't even ask it as a question.

"I think." I realize that he's giving me an honest answer, like the one I gave him earlier. He looks at me then. "But I'd rather be here with you, Leah."

When he says that, I want to take him in my arms and whisper that everything will be alright. Because he looks terrible, like maybe one of his organs is eating another one, or at least that's what his expression looks like. But I know that if I make love to him, he won't look that way, and maybe then he will forget that he's supposed to be in pain.

I really, really hate imprinting.

And so I remind myself for the hundred-thousandth time that none of this is Nessie's fault. She's just a little girl. I haven't been as good to her as I should have been. I should have gone to see her before this. I was just busy. Busy what? Busy fantasizing about my body and Jake's…. oh god, so not helpful right now. Anyway, not a good reason to ignore the kid whose life I'm affecting. I will go see her tomorrow. And ask her again what she thinks. About school, as well. It's odd, because I used to tell her that she should go to school. When Jacob was gone, and I was staying with the Cullens' as much as possible. I even slept on that giant dog bed a few times with Scott. They got him his own, tiny one, but I really don't mind sharing. And they did actually have an extra bed somewhere, but it was weird. I have the feeling the only reason the Cullens own any kind of bed is so they can have sex on it, and quite honestly, I'd rather kick it on the dog bed that they got for Jake. And yes, I used to smell it and think about him and wish that it actually smelled like him (he left it in the rain, once. He was too upset to sleep under their roof, so he dragged it out into the forest and it got rained on…Upset because of Nahuel showing up, upset because Nessie's ownership of him… upset for other reasons, too, that he hasn't told me.)

Tomorrow morning I will go see Nessie and I will talk to her. And I will help Rosalie measure her for her flower girl dress.

Jesus, and then I have to tell Bella that the Elders are going to tell Charlie about her and her little vamp family. Oh god. Why did I agree to help my mom with that? Maybe Bella won't play "kill the messenger" with the girl who tells her that her dad is going to be a Volturi target. Actually, it's kind of stupid, anyway. The Volturi are not that scary. They don't really stand a chance against werewolves. Charlie's safe, living in the middle of the wolf Fort Knox.

I almost, almost came close to killing a leech, once. But something happened and Jake had to bail me out. At the time I was pissed at him—my pride did not like having to be saved by a boy. But now it doesn't bother me so much.

When we leave the restaurant, we don't go home and make love. We are sitting in his car when his stomach rumbles. "Still hungry?" I ask. He nods. I am, too. It was a really, really nice dinner, but shapeshifters sort of eat a lot. So we go and get fast food and sit in the Rabbit and make fun of each other. (See, I said it wasn't that romantic.) He has about three hamburgers.

"You ready to go home?" he asks me. I don't say anything. I don't want to go home. I want to be with him. "Leah?"

"Mmm, yeah, okay," I say, as noncommittally as possible. If I go home, I will lay in bed tonight staring at my ceiling or my walls thinking about Nessie and Bella and Charlie and school and Rosalie and Alice moving away…

"Tiny?" he says. He hasn't called me that in a long time.

"Yeah, okay, I said that was fine."

He blushes and looks at his knees. "I was sort of hoping you'd want to go home with me."

It's the blushing that gets me. Jacob is actually a very, very sweet boy. But then again, I'm very probably blushing as well, and I'm about as sweet as a lemon.

X X X X X X X X X X X

We have to be quiet. Or at least we try. The house is dark when we get there, and we manage to creep to his room without knocking over any large pieces of furniture. He grabs my hand and leads me. When we get to his bedroom, he turns his lamp on instead of the overhead light. It casts weird shadows around the room and makes everything seem yellowish. I sit on the edge of his bed awkwardly, trying to kick off my shoes. Neither of us has said anything since we decided to do this. I wish I knew what he was thinking.

He's watching me, and I'm worried that I look weird in the lamplight. But I shake my head, trying to stop myself thinking. Don't be that nervous, awkward girl, Leah. Don't be vulnerable. Be the wolf-girl that all the other wolves are afraid of, whose temper is legendary.

Jake is standing in front of me now. He reaches down and grabs his shirt, the nice dressy-ish one, and in one smooth motion pulls it over his head. He has one of those stupid white tank top undershirt thingies that guys wear under it. It actually looks hot on him, but then again, I think anything would look hot on Jacob. But then that comes off, too, and there's suddenly a very, very attractive shirtless man about a foot away from me.

I start to lift off my own shirt, but one he stops me with one of his hands. "Don't," he whispers, in that voice of his that appears whenever we are together like this, the one that I dream about, that makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up and my nipples hard.

"You don't want me naked?" I ask him, smirking. Or trying to smirk. I hope it's a smirk. Because otherwise I will start giggling excitedly or something equally embarrassing.

He makes a noise deep in his throat and I am about to tell him that werewolf though I may be, fluent in growls I am not, when he says, "I just want to…"

He takes a step closer, standing between my legs, and I can't help it, I put my hands on his side and start kissing his stomach. There's something about his skin, pulled tight over his muscles… Well, let's just say that werewolf men have incredible bodies. Especially Jake.

"God, Leah, don't tease me,"

And before I can say, 'who's teasing?' I'm on my back. He's laid me down with my head on the pillows and he's kneeling over me, tugging at my shirt. This time, he gets my bra off on the first try, and he lowers his mouth to my breasts straight away.

Being quiet in these circumstances is pretty hard. But he keeps shushing me and putting his finger over my lips. So I start sucking on it, which seems to have the desired effect.

I know he's as turned on as I am, because I can feel him pressing against my thigh. For my part, I can't stop moving my hips, trying to press against him.

"Seriously, I want this to last…" he whispers, his mouth coming up to my ear. That just about does it for me. Screw making this last.

But there's not much I can do, since any time I try to touch him he tells me to hold still and stop distracting me. So it does last, it lasts entirely too long. Until my body is covered in his kisses and we're both naked and I really, truly can't take any more, but no, not even then. I whimper my protests but he says "I want to do this properly for once," as if the other times weren't proper. God I want him _now_, not in seven years or however the hell long it's going to take him…

…but I'm not really upset because it is _very _nice….

And then finally he can't wait any longer, maybe me pressing up against him and whispering in his ear has finally done something to him, because then he's between my legs and one of his arms is under my head, and I wrap my limbs around him and hold him as close as I can and instead of whispering in his ear that everything will be alright I moan his name again and again.

Afterward, he kisses me as gently as possible and tells me that I'm beautiful and starts to say something else but stops himself. He lays down next to me and closes his eyes, but I roll onto my side and poke his stomach and ask him if that's all.

And then it's my turn and I'm covering _him_ with kisses and my tongue traces all of the outlines of his muscles and lower and then he's the one pleading with me. And finally I agree, but not after I've made him wait as long as he did for me, and anyway, I wait as long as I can stand, but eventually I can't kiss him any more, but when he tries to pin me I stop him and settle myself above him.

He has to sit up to kiss me, forcing his tongue into my mouth in what I assume is an effort to keep us quiet. It's not a gentle kiss, obviously. I bite his lip. But I finish first and my body goes limp and he has to hold my hips and move me because I'm too tired to do any more, and then after he comes he pulls us both down against the bed and I snuggle with my head on his shoulders and his arms around me.

I fall asleep like that, too worn out to speak, and what would we talk about, anyway? But I can't have been asleep very long before he's kissing my neck and it wakes me up, and then we fall into a heap of limbs and bodies and kisses and I think his sweat must be so embedded in my skin now that everyone, or at least all the wolves and leeches, will be able to smell him on me, but for some reason, I want to smell like I've been in bed with Jacob.

Neither of us gets much sleep. At some point, he turns his lamp off, but even then there's still enough light for me to see the outlines of his body. And in the morning we are both still lying there, pressed together. His bed isn't long enough, but it's wide enough that we could each have our own side and our own pillow. But he's in the middle and I'm about half on top of him. "I should go," I whisper.

"No. You shouldn't." And then he rolls over and pulls me with him so he's spooning me. His breath tickles my cheek and it feels…nice.

"Mmm, yes, I sort of need to."

"Leah, it's 7 am. Don't go yet. At least wait until my dad has left the house."

And I'm happy to have an excuse to lay there with him for a few more hours, just being held.

X X X X X X X XX X

A few years ago, I hated the Cullens. Well, really, what's not to hate, I mean, they are _vampires_ after all. And no one should have that much money. But then for some stupid reason I agreed to thank Alice for the gift card she got me, the card that paid for my ridiculous pair of favorite high heels, and Alice told me off for making fun of Rosalie, whose name I didn't even know…

…and then again for some reason that I cannot fathom I started hanging out there a lot. It was nice to have female friends. Sam took that away from me, when I phased the first time. I guess it's not his fault, though. But I was alone, or actually, not alone, because there were so many damn boys in my head all the time, hearing everything in there, and subjecting me to their own stupid thoughts … Actually, I was alone. Being in a pack like that, having no freedom and no privacy, yeah, that's alone. So I ran off to Canada, realized there was nothing in La Push for me to be afraid of, and came back. And befriended the freakin' _vampires_.

When Jake left, I spent even more time over there. If I was at home, I had to be around Seth, Embry and sometimes Quil, or my mom and Charlie and their awkward courtship. Running around as a wolf is pretty awesome, but not all the time. So I hung out with the leeches, because some of them actually understand me. Rosalie does, since she knows what it's like to not have a perfect life, and Alice, in a different way, because she's just observant. And Jasper, because he knows how everyone feels, all of the time, which at first I thought was weird but now I just feel sort of sorry for him. Or maybe it's admiration. I mean, I couldn't deal with that shit. I feel way too much on my own. I actually sort of hated him in the beginning, because it's very hard to lie to him about my emotions, and that's sort of something I pride myself on. Not letting other people know how I feel.

Feeling depressed? Act like a bitch. No one will notice. Or at least none of the male wolves.

So Jasper understands me, too then, and so does Emmett. Yeah, I know, it's a funny concept. Emmett understanding something. He's not dumb though. Jasper teases him, but he's really not dumb. But understand is still probably the wrong word. Here's a better way of saying it: Emmett doesn't care. He says exactly what is on his mind and I like that. And he doesn't care about offending anyone, because he gives everyone else credit for being like him, even though most people don't deserve it. He's very straightforward. I can see why Rosalie likes him. He's one of the least duplicitous people I have ever met.

Carlisle too seems pretty cool. I've gotten to know him okay during our little werewolf medical appointments. He has a sense of humor. And he's remarkably unweird about all the awkward conversations he's walked in on. Esme I know the least. She's the mother figure, and maybe it's because I have a mother that I see every day that she hasn't tried to start mothering me. She sort of mothers Jacob, actually, and that's kind of funny. She's always trying to feed and clothe him.

And then there's the Happy Little Leech family. I don't hate Bella. I should just say that straight out. I don't hate her. She just drives me absolutely crazy. She's basically the opposite of everything I want to be, of everything I admire. Jacob told me once that Edward told him that Bella was like silk over glass. That actually makes me want to slit my writs _with some glass_. If any man ever described me as smooth and breakable I'd jump off a cliff _onto some glass_.

But Bella's about to be my stepsister. So I really, really need to work on the whole being nice issue. It's not like I haven't tried in the past. As soon as I try to be decent to her she goes and screws it up. By saying something about Jacob. I still can't forgive her for how she treated him. It was like watching Sam break up with me all over again, except that Bella didn't do it cleanly. If Sam had tried to keep me and Emily around, both of us, god, I don't know what I would have done. (Awhile ago I would have maybe taken that offer, just to remember what it felt like to be wanted. Not since I found peace in Jacob's arms.)

And I shouldn't hate her just because everyone thinks she's pretty, just because every male in Washington State was in love with her at a time when my heart was being ripped out and stomped on and my femininity mocked….

No, I shouldn't hate Bella. So let's go with _dislike_.

Edward is, well, he's alright. Kind of sickeningly romantic. I mean, a bit of romance I'm not going to say no to, but the whole "watching her while she's sleeping before we really know each other" is creepy. Not getting any less creepy, either. And I still can't really forgive him for leaving Bella. Yeah, I know, I hate, er, dislike her, and yet I'm mad that her Love Leechy left her. Well, yes. No girl likes to be left by her boy. No girl wants to wake up hoping it was a dream and he'll be right there, right with you, not gone, not in love with your cousin.

Okay, so maybe my issues with Bella and Edward have a slight element of projection.

Nessie's okay, though. I mean, she's pretty cool. Spunky. Really, really, really screwed up, but aren't we all? No idea who she is, what her place in the world is, what the hell species she even is…. And I like that. I like not being the only one. I like being called "Aunt Leah" and that she came to me before Bella when she got her period (I can see how that'd be confusing for a half-vamp child). Now, this is the truth, and I don't want to think too much about it, because I will start feeling crappy, but I really don't want to hurt her. I really don't want to take Jacob away from her. It was easier to fantasize about him when I didn't know her. And later, easier to make love to him when I didn't know that she was leaving and it was going to destroy him.

Because I do sort of almost maybe kind of believe that if Nessie leaves, Jacob will be destroyed. Not destroyed. Weakened? Depressed? Lethargic? Develop a slight head cold? Who knows?

So that's how I feel about the leeches. And now I'm here, at their house. About to knock. Delivering the news that's going to make them very, very angry with me.

Not really looking forward to it.

Emmett opens the door. "Hey, there, Lady Wolf," he starts, "how's the den?"

"Yeah, we're alright. How's the crypt?"

"Same as ever. Jasper's still a blond pretty boy, Edward's still a prude."

I walk in and see both of Emmett's brothers sitting in the main room. They're glaring at him. Edward seems to be reading some kind of medical textbook or something. It has a drawing of a person's muscles on the cover. Maybe it's a vamp cookbook, I don't know. Anyway, Jasper is just kind of chilling, _The_ _Seattle Times_ nowhere in sight.

"Emmett, I'd be careful what I'd start, if I were you. I won't go as easy on you as that bear did," Jasper says.

"Okay, yeah, Jasper, thanks for the warning. I am sure you'll come kick my ass, just as soon as you've finished brushing your hair."

"Do you have any idea how many fights I've been in?" Jasper asks him.

"Yeah, actually, I do, because you never shut up about it. It's called 'over-compensation.'"

"You want to talk about compensation, look at the ridiculous truck you drive."

"Oh, good one, because you know, I've never had any complaints—"

"Please!" Edward says suddenly, slamming down his medical textbook/leech cookbook. "There is a lady present." He gestures toward me. "You wanted to see Bella?" he asks, already knowing the answer. I nod anyway. "She's not going to be happy about it."

"Why would Bella not want to see Leah?" Emmett asks.

"I'm assuming that he's referring to what Leah's going to see Bella _about_," Jasper tells him.

"Why are you seeing Bella? Is it super important? Is this about you having sex with Jacob?" Emmett asks me.

"Yeah. I was going to get some tips." Before I can make any smartass comments, though, Edward has gotten up and headed toward the stairs.

"Is it about the wedding?" says Jasper.

I nod. Why lie? "Yeah, the Council is going to tell Charlie…"

Jasper grimaces. I think if it were possible for him to blanch he'd be all blanched out. "You're putting him in danger."

I shrug. "We can look after our own, leech."

"And Charlie is one of you now?"

"Yeah. He's going to be my mother's husband. She's an Elder. So yeah."

"Wait a sec," says Emmett, "Telling Charlie? What about your secret thing? You aren't supposed to tell people? Isn't that one of your rules?

"Well, yes, but that's Sam's rule, not Jacob's, and anyway, we're not telling him about _us_. He already knows about us. Jake told him, remember?"

"So what are you telling him?"

Jasper glares at Emmett. "You're a moron."

Comprehension dawns. "Holy shit! What? You can't be serious!"

"Yeah—" I start to say, but he cuts me off.

"No. The Volturi—"

"As I said, we can take care of him."

"Isn't this breaking the treaty?" Emmett asks. I'm a little surprised it's coming from him and not from Jasper. Before I can respond, the door from the kitchen opens and Carlisle walks into the room.

"Yes. It is. But we broke the treaty first, remember? When we made Bella into one of us."

"You're taking this pretty calmly," Jasper says to him. Carlisle nods.

"Jacob told me about it this morning. And I got a letter a few days ago about it from Quil Ateara."

"Quil Sr. wrote you a letter?" I ask. It comes out as more of a demand. If Jake and everyone else were just going to tell the bloodsuckers, then what the hell am I here for?

"Yes. I think any other form of communication would have been most distasteful to him." He must be reading the expression on my face, because he adds, "I appreciate that you are here to help me tell Bella, though. It is her father; she will react protectively."

As he says it, Edward comes back down the stairs with Bella and Nessie in tow. Behind Nessie are Esme, Rosalie and Alice.

"What's going on?" Rosalie asks.

"Leah and I want to tell Bella something," says Carlisle. I'm actually really grateful he's helping. I was sort of imagining Bella ripping my heart out for being involved in putting her dad in danger. And like, feeding it to Nessie or something. (Not that I think Nessie is a devourer of hearts. It was more just the image of Bella murdering me and feeding her Spawn.)

"The Council is going to tell Charlie about what you are," I tell her. It sounds abrupt and probably not too nice, 'what you are,' but I just want to get it over with.

She doesn't say anything. To her credit.

"He'll be safe. He's moving onto the Rez."

She's still silent.

"And I'm sure…" my voice trails off. I could say something like "I'm sure the shock won't kill him," and wouldn't _that_ just be a really funny thing for _me_ to say, given my own situation.

"I already know."

"What?"

"Esme told me." She smiles at her mother-in-law.

"I thought we were going to have a family meeting!" Carlisle says to his wife. She smiles at him.

"Honey, Bella deserved to be told alone. Not in a meeting." Esme turns to me, then, and produces an envelope. "Please give this to your mother. It's an invitation to our house for next weekend. I do hope she can make it. You know we've really want to meet her, since she's joining the family."

Joining the family. Of vampires. Something I am sure my mother never had in mind.

X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X XX X X

I don't just fulfill that half of my obligations, though. I go the whole mile. I take Nessie for a walk in the forest the day after that. She's got Scott on a leash trotting along side us.

"How are you, kid?" I ask.

"I'm fine, thank you, and yourself?"

"Eh."

"Has Jacob told you that I will be attending school?" she says. When Nessie speaks, in her actual voice, she tends to talk like she fell out of a 19th century novel. I suppose that's because she loves reading them so much. Or because she's the daughter of Edward.

"Yeah, he said that. You excited?" She nods and bites her lip.

"And nervous, Aunt Leah."

"Well, school's like that."

"I'm not worried about it academically. Just socially," she tells me.

"I know that one."

"Jacob says we're very similar," she says. I repress the urge to shudder. Now _there's _a scary thought. "Obviously not that similar," she adds, "but he says we're both… unsure of whether or not we've been made correctly."

I don't say anything to that. There's really nothing to say. We walk along in silence for awhile.

"Jacob makes you happy." It's not a question. I make a noise of assent. "You make him happy, too."

"Jake's a very happy person," I tell her.

"No, he's not." She meets my eyes and we stop walking. "He really isn't. He's not sure of himself anymore. And he's afraid."

"We're all afraid, Nessie," I say, because it's the most honest thing I can say. And it's something she's not going to hear anywhere else.

"He doesn't like what he's becoming."

I bite my lip. I hope… well, I hope that she's not talking about me and him.

"He doesn't like what Sam being around is doing to him. He's afraid that he's not himself anymore. Like when he first imprinted." Her voice at the end is quiet.

I didn't realize that she knew how he felt at first. "He loves you, Nessie. He was just afraid, in the beginning."

"Jacob has no choice but to love me, Aunt Leah," she says patiently, as if I were the child and she the adult. "He has a choice about you and that's why it's beautiful."

Beautiful?

"Come with me," she says.

"What?"

"To school. When I leave to go to school, come with me."

"Nessie…"

"Please? It would make you happy. You'd be away from Sam and his pack and you could go to college."

"It's complicated."

"Yes, I know. Everything is always complicated." We start walking again. How can I explain about the pack situation at La Push? I can't just… leave. I did that once. It didn't help anything, not really. True, it helped me, but I had to come back. Wolves are like that.

"I heard something that made me think of you, Aunt Leah," she says. My hand automatically goes to where the pendant her family gave me is hanging between my breasts. The one with Jasper's quotation. _You were wild here once. Don't let them tame you_.

She clears her throat. "It's from a song."

"Oh." Oh god. I really don't want to be compared to some horribly angsty song about, about what? About a girl who's heartbroken? Or about a girl having lots of hot sex with her hot Alpha, because I don't think they make songs like that.

"It goes like, '…ring the bells that still can ring. There is a crack, a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in.'"

"Nessie—"

"It makes me think of you, and Aunt Rosalie, and Aunt Alice, and my grandmother. But you should just remember that. Something doesn't have to be perfect for it to be good."

"Perfect?"

"Nothing is actually perfect, that's what I am trying to tell you. If it were, it would be boring."

"You're very perceptive for your age." I tell her, and she smiles. _For her age_. She's a lot of things for her age. Old. Physically, mentally, emotionally.

"Mom's life is perfect," she says then. We're walking very slowly. Scott seems to have accepted this and is not pulling quite so much on the leash. "Do you think my life will ever be like that?"

"I thought you said perfect was boring?"

She bites her lip. "I don't know what I am trying to say. In novels, everyone always gets a happy ending. A perfect ending. Like my parents."

"Not everyone."

"Yes, not bad people," she says, and I look at her sharply. "Aunt Leah, that's the point. I am talking about books, where bad things only happen to bad people. Not real life. In real life bad things happen and there's no way to stop them."

"Yes."

"But not for me."

"I don't follow."

"My life is boring," she shrugs. "I should not complain because I am so young. Or rather, I have only been alive a short time. But everything is perfect. Except me. Everything around me is perfect, but I'm not. My life is boring but I am not happy. Either my life needs to change or I need to," she pauses, and then adds, "when I grow up, do you think I could ever be like my parents?"

"Nessie, you are perfect."

"Please don't say that. Everyone always tells me how perfect I am, how wonderful. I'm not normal. I'm not even a normal halfbreed, if there is such a thing. I'm not like Nahuel. I have this gift, and—"

"Your gift makes you very special."

"Maybe I don't want to be special. Maybe I want to be normal."

"Nessie, we don't always get what we want."

She says nothing after that. Lost in her own thoughts, I guess. God, she really is…. Mature? Precocious? Unsure of herself?

"Your mother didn't know who she was, either," I say, because I should say something. And because it's true. And someone has to tell Nessie that her mother didn't always have such a perfect little eternity. "She didn't know who or what she was until your father bit her." I try to keep the disgust out of my voice, or at least to a minimum, when I say 'bit her.'

"Nahuel bit me."

"I remember." How could I forget? Jacob nearly imploded.

"It didn't do anything. I'm not human, but I'm not a vampire either."

"Not being a vampire isn't a bad thing."

"Come with me?"

"When you leave for school? Nessie, I can't. La Push—"

"You don't even like La Push. And I need someone else there, someone besides my parents. Someone who doesn't tell me what a perfect little angel I am all the time."

"Rosalie is going, isn't she?"

"You're one of the only people I know who isn't a vampire. You're not immortal in the same way that they are. And you sleep, and eat real food, and…. And I want to be like you."

"No, you don't."

"Yes. Because you _feel_. I want to feel something. Not just through books. Not just hear about what it was like when my aunts and uncles and parents and grandparents were human. I want to know. There are characters in books that have felt more than I have, people who aren't even real."

"I don't think I can go with you, Nessie. And I'm sorry." The scary thing is that I actually am sorry.

What the hell is happening to me?

X X X X X X X X X X X X

My mother won't go to the Cullens' house. She sent a nice little note back to Esme saying that after the wedding, then yes. In the meantime, she and Bella and Nessie and Esme and I are going to get our dresses taken care of together. Esme isn't in the wedding party, but my mother has invited her along to make up for refusing to go to her house.

This is actually a pretty big step for my mom. Meeting with the Cold Ones. We're going to Seattle, to one of the stores my mom found when she was out there with her friends a few weeks ago. The night Jacob slept over.

There's a pretty massive reason why Mom's not going over there, though, besides her own issues. Charlie's not taking the news too well. I haven't seen him, but Mom and Seth told me he's freaking out. She's been over at his house trying to talk to him. But she's not really the person he's upset with.

The person he's mad at is Jacob.

Jake went over to see him. He told me about it afterward. The gist of it is that Charlie kept saying "You _knew_ what he was, and you didn't stop her."

I don't know what Jacob said to that; he didn't tell me. I would guess he protested, reminded Charlie that he did everything in his power to stop Bella from choosing Edward. I think Jake didn't want to tell me that part. It's not like I don't know, though. I used to have his dreams about kissing Bella. Which I suppose balanced out the dreams he used to have about Sam because of me.

And now there's nothing to do but wait. Wait for Charlie to calm down. Wait for the wedding. It's as if the wedding is some kind of gateway for all of us. After the wedding, my mom will have to go see the Cullens. After the wedding, Seth and I get the house. Start our lives. Get jobs. Let the pack move in. After the wedding, Jacob's going to actually have to fight Sam, as much as he doesn't want to. After the wedding, Nessie's going to leave.

X X X X X X X X X X X

It's funny, I can't decide if time is going slowly or quickly. There's nothing going on, so it seems slow. But then I wake up and a whole week has passed.

I got my dress fitted. It matches Bella's. Esme and my mom were both trying so hard to be nice to each other. Well, Esme is a very nice woman naturally. My mother was probably trying not to throw up or drench her with holy water or something.

Charlie's better. He and my mom had Bella and Nessie over for dinner. Nessie ate, Bella didn't. Charlie loves Nessie (but doesn't everyone?) so I think seeing her helped. Edward wasn't invited.

And then all of a sudden Edward and Jacob were helping Charlie move furniture from his old house, to the new one on the Rez that he and my mom just bought.

I've seen Jake every day. We're almost like a normal couple. We don't talk about Sam and the fight, because Jacob doesn't want to, and we don't talk about Nessie leaving, because I don't know what to say to him about it. How to comfort him.

We sleep together whenever we can. Whenever we think we're being sneaky about it. Not that our families don't know, but come on, it's awkward.

Days go by, and then weeks. Every weekend involves helping my mom get something ready. One week it's the food, another we're going to Port Angeles to look for paint colors for the new house. She and Charlie want to fix it up differently, make it special. Well, I think it's more my mom. I don't think he cares too much, to be honest.

I can see why she wanted the wedding so soon. There seems to be so much to do, and I think if she'd given it longer then the tasks would have spread themselves out, taken up more time.

So weeks pass and I hardly notice. Alice and Rosalie want me to remodel my room, in celebration of me renting the house. I tell them it's silly. They've never even seen my room—they can't.

I still don't know if Jacob is moving in or not. We haven't actually talked about it. I think because it's so damn awkward. We're not really at a "living together" stage. Seth wants him to move in, but then that's Seth, and he isn't really thinking about it from Jacob and my situation.

A month goes by, and then another. It's very surreal—all of the things that I know will happen after the wedding seem like dreams, things that could be talked about but not actually occur. Sam and Jacob. The house. Nessie leaving.

I feel like that until the wedding.

X X X X X X XXX XX

The day of the wedding is sort of anti-climatic, after all that. Not like Sam's wedding, where I had a rock in my chest. Mostly I'm just too busy helping to think.

It's going to be simple. It's what they want. My mom's dress isn't even a bridal gown, not really. It's a very deep blue. I respect her and Charlie a lot for how they're doing this.

Before the ceremony, my mom has all of us monsters together for a little talk. Right in the middle of where the chairs are set up. She and Charlie are there. To one side, making a right angle, are the Cullens, all of them. Even Nessie is there, being held up by Emmett. It's sort of funny looking because even though she's the right age to be held up by her uncle, she looks like she's a tween, or hell, even a young teenager.

Facing the Cullens are Sam, Emily, and Jared and Kim. Funny, I don't remember Jared and Kim being invited, but I guess they had to come along. It looks like Sam can't be without part of his pack. Although I shouldn't talk about the Alpha-beta relationship thing, should I?

Jacob, Seth, Quil, Embry and I are on the last side, making a sort of awkward square all together. It's clearly supposed to be leeches versus wolves, but Jacob and Sam don't want to stand anywhere near each other.

This is the first time I've seen Sam since everyone found out about me and Jacob. Emily's standing behind him, like he's protecting her from the big, scary bloodsuckers. She looks _very_ pregnant—she must be almost seven months. Christ. I mean, that's really pregnant. Sam's too busy glaring at Carlisle and Edward to look at me or Jacob. I wonder if he even actually cares about us being lovers or if that's just what everyone said. After he first left me, I used to want to get a new boyfriend just to piss him off. Or like, make out with some guy and then think about it in wolf form so he'd remember what he'd lost. Now I just want him to go away.

"Okay, kids, play nice," my mother says, and I almost laugh. The woman clearly does have a sense of humor. "I don't want any fights on my wedding day."

Esme smiles at her. I am sure she and Carlisle are just here for the formality—I don't think anyone expects Carlisle to punch Sam in the face or anything. Although it would be pretty cool.

Sam and Jared grimace. Oh, shut up, you idiots, if it's so hard for you to be here then you can just leave. No one actually _wants_ your lame pack around. Ugh.

My mom holds eye contact with Edward, then Jacob, then Sam. It's funny, it seems much more likely for the Cullens to team up with my pack against Sam rather than Sam and Jacob going against the leeches. Anyway, I wonder why she's looking at Edward. He's not exactly the Head Vamp. Or is he? I mean, we've already established that Carlisle's not going to be picking a fight with anyone… my money is still on Emmett and Jasper for starting something.

"We won't fight," Jacob says. I shiver—something about how low his voice is…. I really can't help myself. He sounds so grown up, so mature. So sure of himself. _Stop it, Leah. Not an appropriate time_. Yeah, I call myself by my name.

Everyone stares awkwardly around the circle for awhile longer and then we start to disperse. The guests, the regular guests, are going to be arriving, and I guess it'd be weird for us all to be huddled together. What _will_ people think?

X X X X XXXXX X XX

And just like that, my mother is getting married. Just like at Sam's wedding, Jacob winks at me from where he's standing behind Charlie. Edward is there, of course, standing between Jacob and Seth. There's lots of people everywhere, especially considering they didn't even want to invite anyone. But I'm too busy thinking about my mother, trying to look after things, that I don't notice much.

It's very, very…. Well, it doesn't seem like it's really happening. My mother is getting married. _Married_. Still, I'm glad it's to Charlie. I like Charlie.

They kiss and everyone applauds. No cheers or whistles at the kiss like at that other wedding. I'm cheering, too, but all I can think of is that, my god, they're actually married. I have a stepfather. And a stepsister. And Nessie is really my niece. I'm actually related to the leeches now. We are actually the Addams family or the Munsters or something.

And then a second later my mom is surrounded by people congratulating her. Charlie, too. We're having the reception right here, so there's no receiving line or anything. And then Charlie breaks away from all my mom's friends and I see him talking to Billy. Can't really blame him there. A bit away Edward and Jacob are talking, and that's sort of surprising. I wonder what they are talking about? Maybe arguing about which of them looks better in a tux? (Correct answer would be Jacob).

I wander off toward the edge of the park, past where the tables are set up. There's a little ridge around it, sloping down toward the grass where the wedding was. I stand on the raised area and look around. I can see Sam, talking to Emily, Kim and Jared. If my mother were bothering with the whole bouquet thing, my money would be on Kim catching it.

It's easier to look at him from far away then from up close. At first, right after he and Emily got together, I couldn't look at him without seeing the space around him and know it used to be mine, my space to be in. That faded. Then I couldn't look at him without hating him. Now… he's really not that interesting to look at. Not that handsome. Just a man. Mid-twenties. Soon-to-be father.

Was I ever really that in love with him? Was I actually so upset when he married Emily that I had to go cry in the forest? Did I really try to kiss him at my father's funeral? _Why? _

Embry comes up and stands beside me. "What's up, freak?"

"You know, just chilling. Don't know if you heard, but my mom got married today. Kind of like how yours never did."

"Oooooh, firey today," he says. I know, I know, I say horrible things to Embry all the time, but we are passed the part where we offend each other. And if I occasionally strike a low-blow, well, it's no worse than the jokes he makes about me and Jacob, the ones that would put Emmett to shame.

I'm about to say something else when I look up. Sam's walking over here.

Oh. That's not good.

"Leah, can I talk to you?" he asks. I nod. Oh, right, apparently that's his way of telling Embry to leave. Because Embry sort of gives me an awkward smile and eyebrow wiggle that's supposed to convey some kind of meaning (probably "don't murder him on your mother's wedding day) and scoots off a few feet. Clearly just to get a better vantage point.

"Hi."

"Hi, Sam," I say. "How are you?"

"Fine. How are you?"

"I'm great."

There's a long, awkward pause.

"You're being cold," Sam says. Oh, okay. Yeah, I am being cold. Oh no. Someone's ex-girlfriend is being cold to them. Hold the phones.

"Not really."

"He's going to hurt you, you know," he says suddenly. Aha, the true reason for him coming over here emerges. I roll my eyes at him.

"Hmmm, or not."

"Leah, don't be naïve."

Ok, see, I was going to be a decently reasonable person to Sam. I mean, I don't really see why he cares about who I sleep with. I am not the one who broke up with him and then hooked up with his cousin. But, and let me be really clear on this, _he _started it. He called me naive. And he told me Jacob is going to hurt me. You know what? Like I don't think about that enough. Like I don't wonder what's going to happen when Nessie is older.

Like I need my dumbass exboyfriend reminding me about imprinting.

So I decide that being Nice-Leah is overrated.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Sam, you seem to have confused yourself with Jacob," I tell him in what I hope is an uberbitch voice.

He sort of grimaces for a second, like what I've said actually has a physical bad taste. "Leah, I'm trying to look out for you."

"Yep. You've been very good at that."

"Leah, please. You're not handling this very well."

"Thanks for your concern, but I'm a big girl and I can date anyone I want to."

"Oh, so he's actually going through the formalities of dating you then?" I think I can almost hear Embry, who is standing far enough away to be convincing, make that "oooooh-ing" noise.

"Yes, Sam, but he doesn't have to. I'd sleep with him anyway."

Ok, now Sam looks pissed. Well, he should. It's my fucking life and he shouldn't mess around in it. Things would work out so much better if he stayed in his area and left me and Jacob in ours. "Don't you understand? He's _imprinted_. He _will _leave you for her."

"Projecting much?"

"Leah, this is not a game. I don't want to see you get hurt."

And then I say it. I don't know why I say it, but I do. I'm just really, really annoyed with Sam right now. I want to say something that will shut him up, that will make him stop telling me Jake's going to leave me. So I insult his honor as an Alpha.

"Oh, shut up Sam! You're just pissed because I've had more Alpha in me than you _ever_ will."

This time, Sam really does look pissed. Way beyond what he was before. His hands ball up into fists.

X X X X X X X X X X

A/N:

I know that is a terrible place to end it, but if I didn't stop, I would keep going and this chapter would be a ridiculous length and also would never get posted because I'd always be adding to it…. I will try to get the next one out a bit faster though!

And the lyric Nessie mentions is another Leonard Cohen one, this time from "Anthem." (If you read Endless Daylight, there's a Cohen quotation in that one too… I just really likes how he writes about relationships.)

Remember to review!


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Thank you to everyone who has been reviewing, seriously, _thank you! _I know some of you were getting worried that this was abandoned, but that's not the case. You're going to have to believe me when I tell you I will not abandon this story—I have the ending all planned out, outlined even, so it's not like I am making up what's happen next.

Now you're going to wonder why, if I know where it's going, I take weeks to update… well, during the last few weeks of summer, I had nothing going on, so I could write all day. Now, I spend most every day reading or writing essays for my tutorials. When I'm not writing essays, I tend to, you know, socialize and such. Personally, I think you should want me to write fanfiction with a fresh mind that's been relaxing instead of one that's just finished an essay, since my mood will be better and I won't accidentally have Leah analyzing currency crises in emerging markets!

What I am trying to say is that I am sorry it took me so long to get this out, but I can't promise that it won't happen again, since right now school has to be my main priority. (If we're being honest, I'm a bit like Hermionie… Granted, I do sometimes wish my education were as easy as Bella's and all I had to do was a bit of work each week and could spend the rest of the time cuddled up with a boy, but sadly, no. Or the no-sleeping thing would be great too….)

And I really mean thank you for the reviews! Because they keep me going! I love you!

PS: This chapter is a bit shorter than normal, mostly because I felt guilty about it taking so long, so I wanted to go ahead and get something up.

* * *

"Oh, shut up Sam! You're just pissed because I've had more Alpha in me than you _ever_ will."

This time, Sam really does look pissed. Way beyond what he was before. His hands ball up into fists.

This time, I almost regret pushing him so far. _Almost_. He broke your heart, dear, and now he's going to lecture you? Not a chance.

This time, Embry's "ooooh" noise is distinctly loud.

"_Leah_," Sam says, and it comes out as a snarl. He was never this feisty when we were together.

"Yes?" I say, full of bitchiness and spite. I am about to insult him again when Jacob appears between us.

"What's going on?" His voice is low, too, and full of malice. He and Sam are making weird little snarling noises that seem out of place coming from their human mouths.

"Leah's kicking his ass," Embry says, coming over to join us. Out of all of us, he's the least upset. He seems to think it's all pretty funny. There's actually not that much funny about how Sam and Jake are looking at each other.

"Jacob, it's okay," I start to say, putting my hand on his arm. Shit, what the hell am I doing? I'd _love_ it if Jacob punched Sam in the face right now. But what I've said doesn't seem to make a difference anyway. Sam and Jake can't seem to pull their gazes apart. Over Jacob's shoulder I see Quil and my brother. Quil is holding Seth by the arm, keeping him back. Shit, Seth, go away! You really don't need to get involved in any more of my crazy drama.

"What exactly do you think you are doing, Jacob Black?" Sam asks in that weird, low, lupine voice.

"I'm trying to figure out what the fuck _you're_ doing pissing off my girlfriend, Sam Uley."

"Fine, alright, if you're so curious. I was trying to give her some advice, _from a friend_, but I might as well tell it to you, Jacob. You need to stop being so goddamned selfish. You can't just use her this way."

Oh hell no. What the hell does Sam think he's saying? It was bad enough when he was starting on me, but how _dare_ he tell Jake that he's using me? Like I'm not actually a person. Like I can't make my own decisions. Like I need my ex-boyfriend deciding who is and isn't allowed to sleep with me.

And so the second after Sam says it, I'm moving forward again. Screw waiting for Jake to punch him. I'm a big girl. I can punch my own ex-boyfriends. But Jacob throws out one arm and stops me moving forward. His eyes never leave Sam's face.

"Embry, hold her," he growls.

"Wha?" says Embry, clearly surprised to be asked to do anything—probably he was just enjoying watching this unfold. "Oh, hell no, man, she'd probably kick _my _ass."

"Embry, _hold her_," Jake says again, his lips barely moving. I imagine he's using what he thinks is an Alpha voice. Doesn't work in human form.

I don't exactly love Jake telling Embry to restrain me.

"What the fuck, all of you!" I shout. "Sam, stay the hell out of my life! Jacob, stop acting like I can't look after myself. Embry! Ugh!" I don't even know what to say to Embry, so 'ugh' is the most coherent thing that can come out of my mouth. I'm _really_ angry now. Stupid goddamned men. It's great that Jacob is over here and all, but if he's not going to beat the crap out of Sam and is just going to stand around taking up space (the space that I should be flying through on my way to Sam's jugular) then why the hell is he even here?

It takes me a second to realize I'm struggling against Jacob's arm, the one thrown out horizontally to his side, keeping me back. I don't know if I should be impressed at how strong he is our just pissed at having my movement restricted. I'm probably angry enough as it is. _"Let me go, Jacob_," I say, and my voice is a growl, too, like the boys.

"Embry, did you hear what I said, or are you—" Jacob hisses.

But it doesn't matter because before he can demand that Embry hold me, I'm imprisoned in a granite tomb. Stone, all against me. I can't move. Not warm like Jacob, but cold, cold and immobile.

Emmett is holding me. I struggle more. I don't like being trapped like this, being stopped, being interfered with. I swear at him and hit him, tell him to fucking let me go or else.

"Shh…. It's okay, Lady Wolf, you just stay right there… You're not much good against me in this form, and there's no way I'm letting you phase and ruin your nice dress…" over and over with his stupid vampire voice and I can't figure out who I hate more right now. But Emmett's holding me too tight and I have to stop struggling. And then Jasper is there, his hand on my arm, and he's talking to me, too.

"Leah, just relax. It's alright. It's your mother's wedding day, Leah, so let's not have any wolf fights, okay?"

I'm calm, now. I know it's just because of Jasper, but I can't do anything about it. When he says my name like that, it's like he's breathing reason and caution and control into every syllable. I can't be anything other than the collected, calm, composed Leah he's named me.

Frankly I like my version of Leah better. But my arms and hands are starting to hurt from where I hit Emmett, and I realize, with the realizations that come with suddenly being forced into dispassion that I'm not going to win against Emmett and Jasper, and hell, I'm not going to win against Sam. And Jasper's right, it _is _my mother's wedding day and why can't I control my temper?

My baby brother is closer now, still with Quil. At least neither of them look like they are dying to get involved in the fight. Actually, they both look uncomfortable. Seth's glaring at Sam, though, and it fills me with Clearwater pride.

I focus back on where the boys are standing, and unfortunately, Sam is still alive. Jasper is looking at them too, concentrating, it looks like. Ah, so that's why they haven't killed each other yet. I almost enjoy watching Jasper mess around with Sam's emotional state. Ha, maybe Jasper can make Sam actually _feel _something for once in his life.

Oh, there's a second reason the boys aren't ripping off each other's limbs. Esme is standing in between them. Wow. That takes courage.

"…it her wedding, boys, you cannot fight now. I understand if you want to have your Alpha fight, but you _must_ have it another day. Now is not the time nor the place, and you just both need to control yourselves…" she's saying, calmly, motherly. Like she's just walked into the kitchen and found her two toddlers fighting over a toy car and she's trying to treat them with respect but it's actually just a bit patronizing.

"You, too, Leah, no killing ex-boyfriends at your mother's wedding," Emmett whispers to me. I'm still just concentrating on breathing normally. It's harder staying calm with Jasper focusing elsewhere. God, there is no reason for me to have lost my temper like this. I mean, granted, Sam's a jackass, but I've known that for years. "Nicely done on the Alpha comment, by the way," Emmett adds, and I can hear his smile in his voice.

"You heard that?" I ask.

"Super vampire hearing. Comes in handy. And yeah, we _all_ heard it. Nessie keeps asking Edward to explain it to her." He pauses, then adds, "Jasper's sort of at his limit, keeping your wolf boys from fighting."

"It's—"

"A wolf thing? Yeah, got that. And your mom was worried _Edward_ would punch Jacob or something. Oh man, you shapeshifters are a source of endless amusement."

I can see them all, now. Forming a circle, well, a loose circle. They are all standing around, chatting, acting like they _aren't_ in a circle. I guess they are trying not to attract attention. Nothing says "oooh fight!" like a bunch of people clumped at the edge of a field around Sam and Jacob.

Sam and Jake are still growling and snarling at each other. I guess I am past the point where I think that's weird. Jasper looks like he's about to break a sweat keeping them in human form. (Do vampires sweat? I bet they sweat blood. That'd be so…icky).

I see Rosalie and Alice, pretending to chat, but watching me. Rosalie winks and gives me a thumbs up. Alice gives her a "don't encourage her" look. Bella's off, distracting my mom, it looks like. Well, that's good. I'm actually….grateful that they're here. The bloodsuckers, I mean. Well, only in as much as if I can't break a few of Sam's ribs then it isn't worth my mother's wedding being ruined. (Calm _down_ Leah, be a big girl, you don't need Jasper to help you).

"…_fine_," I hear Sam say, and it catches my attention. "Fine, Jacob, you want to finally be a man and take responsibility, fine. Two weeks, then."

"You seem pretty eager to be destroyed, Sam."

"By a boy barely out of adolescence who chooses Cold Ones over his own Tribe and betrays his own imprint? Okay, Jacob, whatever."

"That was a bit contradictory," whispers Emmett. I nod. Someone needs to give Sam a freaking flow-chart that illustrates that Nessie is a Cold One (well, she's half. Lukewarm One?) and Leah is a Quileute. Although the flow-chart would have to be capable of holding Sam's interest, and he's rather mentally limited, let's be honest… so maybe the flow-chart should be the cousin of the original flow-chart.

Sam is turning to leave. Esme sighs and steps away from where they were facing off. Before Sam has taken five steps though, Jacob calls after him.

"Oh, and Sam? Leah is _mine. _So you need to stay the fuck away from her," his voice is threatening. It's not a joke, what he is telling Sam.

Why do I suddenly feel like I'm part of the Jacob/Sam territory divide?

Sam makes a laughing sort of noise. Like he can't believe Jake just said that. I was annoyed at it, too, but now that Sam's annoyed, I'm glad Jacob said it. So I glare at my ex and think, Well, damn right he said that, Sam, so you just run off home now like a coward. Ugh.

"That's not really a problem. I don't know if you've noticed, but she's a little crazy. I wish you too the joy of each other."

* * *

The rest of the wedding is a blur. Mom and Charlie come over; guess they noticed something was going on. Seth tries to intercept them, but Esme goes over and tells them that Jacob and Sam were having a little chat, and my mom blanches. And then she thanks the leeches for helping. Honest to god. I think that raised her respect for them, that it was them stopping the fight… and our own Quileute boys starting it.

Jacob is still shaking. I go over to him, but he's staring off after where Sam left. I wonder if I kiss him if he'll melt, become less stony, if his eyes will snap into focus on me and if he'll smile… he's actually a bit creepy like this. But I don't try. He's too lost in his own world, the one he shares with Sam. Rosalie pulls me away, toward the food. I can't taste any of it, which is sad, because I helped cook some of it. (Actually, since I can't cook, it's probably good that I can't taste it.) But I'm sure all the stuff Bella made is good. Charlie seems happy about her contribution.

I watch him dance with my mom, of course, and then he dances with Bella and Mom dances with Seth. I dance with Charlie, later, and then Embry of all people. He keeps cracking up and quoting me. I guess now that the Alpha staring contest is over, it's all funny to him again. Rosalie and Emmett keep whirling past us, flashing twin grins. I see Bella dancing with Seth, and then I dance with Emmett, who is actually very graceful. Well, of course he is, he's a leech. And I dance with Jasper, and the feeling of calm returns. When I dance with him, I'm not angry anymore, at Sam or myself. I am not even worried about Jacob anymore. (Why hasn't he come over yet?)

I think Jasper could be very addictive, especially to someone like me, who isn't exactly known as unemotional. Although I bet he has a full time job just keeping Bella from freaking out all the time. It must be very easy for him to be with Alice, who doesn't seem to have her emotions flying all over the place.

I asked him once if he ever got tired of it and he laughed and said he used to deal with it by drinking, and I smiled, because he doesn't seem like the alcoholic type, and then I realized what he meant and god help me but I laughed _more_. And then he assured me that all of that was behind him now that he was with the Cullens. I've long since stopped wondering if Jasper's serious about some of the things he says about his pre-Cullen life. I sort of assume he _is_ and that that's why he jokes about it. Like about how I joke about Sam or about giving someone a heart attack. Anyway, he usually only says those things when it's just the two of us in a room, and certainly not when Bella is there.

Jacob still hasn't come over, though. I look over to the field and I can't see him. Where the hell did he go? I really want to talk to him.

After the dance, I catch Edward's eye as I'm looking around. He's holding a glass of champagne about as far away from his body as physically possible and listening to one of my mom's friend's daughters talk. She looks about sixteen; it's not a girl I know, she must not be from our Rez. So she doesn't know to hate the leeches.

Edward actually looks like he's about to kill himself. Probably in some manner involving the champagne glass. He keeps backing up and she keeps moving forward. Pretty soon he's going to run into a table. It's pretty damn funny.

As soon as there is a break in her monologue, Edward, who has been holding the champagne with his right hand and waving his left hand around as much as possible, says "Ah, yes, a similar thing happened to my wife once…"

The emphasis he puts on "my wife" is sort of about to put me in hysterics. I go over, because I can't not.

"Yo, step-brother," I say, because I do actually feel sorry for him (what the hell?).

The girl looks confused. I introduce myself and then I add, "And I see you've met Edward, my new brother. His wife is Charlie's daughter. She's over there with their daughter, Nessie." I point to where Bella is watching Emmett dance with Renesmee. He's just standing next to Bella twirling Nessie around and around. She looks like the happiest kid in the world.

"Daughter?" she says, and looks from Edward to Nessie to Bella. I give her a significant look that says, 'Yes, he is a complete slut and had a baby at age twelve.'

The girl wanders off dejectedly after that.

"Leah, did you see that?" Edward asks as soon as she's out of ear shot. "I was gesturing all over with the left hand, basically waving my ring in her face, and she just did _not _notice! And I am not a….a…"

"A slut?"

"Right! I am not one of those!"

"Yeah, I've noticed. You just don't look old enough to have a tween daughter, and that's what yonder half-breed looks like."

"Do you know what she was _thinking_?"

"Oh, wow, Edward, some girl was thinking about you. That must be so shocking for you. I am sure no girl has ever done that before."

"You're turning into Jasper and Emmett. Today, especially Emmett." Ah, right, even Edward heard my Alpha comment.

"It's called a pun. I thought it was terribly witty."

"It was certainly….clear."

"He was pissing me off."

"Evidently."

"It's not his business if I want to screw Jake!"

Edward rolls his eyes at me. "You and I both know it's more than that. If you were just with Jake for the sex, I wouldn't respect you."

"Oh, because your respect is so important to me."

"In any case, Sam just wants what's best for you."

"Okay, Captain Cliché—"

"I'm serious. I can hear his thoughts, remember?" My turn to roll my eyes; of course I remember that he's always in my head.

"He's worried about you."

"Good for him. Maybe he should get a real hobby."

"And he feels guilty."

"Is he paying you to say this?" I ask. Jesus, I really don't want a play-by-play of Sam's sick little mind.

"I just thought you should know. He doesn't know what to do."

"How nice. Because he's always been so overly confident in everything all the goddamned time."

"Not really. He's just as confused as you and Jake are."

"I am not confused. Now stop listening to my thoughts."

"You are confused. You can't admit that you love Jacob."

"Edward, shut up."

"If you love someone, you should tell them."

Okay, what is he, a Lifetime Channel original movie? Listen, bud, if you love someone, you should _not leave them_.

"You know I never meant to hurt her," he whispers.

"Sorry, I would never have said that out loud," I tell him. And I wouldn't have. It's the sort of bitchy thing you're just supposed to think to yourself. Edward looks lost in thought. I wonder what he's thinking about, what he's remembering.

"I told her that I didn't love her," he says, just as quietly. "It was the worst thing I ever did. So don't you be an idiot with Jacob. He's a good guy. Tell him you love him."

"It's kind of a big deal," I say lamely. I mean, I'm nowhere near that stage. I… I don't know. I really, really like Jake. He's my best friend. And he's great in bed…. And…..

"Oh, right, you can't say you love him, because that's a commitment, but you sleep with him, because that's super casual."

"Do you know what year it is?"

"Morality doesn't go out of style, Miss Clearwater."

I just sigh and roll my eyes again.

"He hasn't left, don't worry."

I pretend like I don't know what he's talking about, but it doesn't do any good, because he knows everything I think. He shakes his head at me.

"No one is going to think any less of you if you actually admit that you're worried about him, Leah. Honestly."

"Gee, Dr. Phil, it's great that you're using your privacy invading powers to make everyone's lives better."

"You know, I actually avoid most people."

"Truly, I am flattered," I tell him. I've finished my champagne and have started on his. Apparently the girl gave it to him and he was too polite to turn it down.

"Did you ever consider what it must be like for me?" I can't tell if he's asking seriously or not or if he's trying to sound emo as a joke.

"I'm not emo."

"Whatever you have to tell yourself to sleep at night."

"I don't sleep."

See, there's a reason vampires aren't fun. At least his brothers have senses of humor. I am thinking of something witty to say when Edward's face changes. Darkens. He looks almost concerned.

"Jacob isn't okay right now," he says quietly.

"What?"

"Talking with Sam upset him. He's….especially Alpha. Maybe I should ask Jasper to look after him…" Edward's voice trails off and his gaze focuses on something over my shoulder. I turn and see Jacob walking toward us. He looks fine to me.

"Hi," he says. His voice sounds tight, but other than that, nothing seems out of place. His tuxedo is immaculate—he obviously hasn't just phased back from wolf form. His face is calm, and that in itself might be a bit weird, because he's usually grinning. His eyes… okay, I know it's just me. Because they almost have a reddish tint to them. Clearly just me imagining things.

"You okay?" I ask. He nods and flashes his trademark grin.

"You aren't imagining it," Edward whispers under his breath.

"Imagining what?" Jake asks.

I lean forward and kiss him quickly on the lips. Like I was dying to do earlier. I'm worried about him, a bit. And embarrassed that he had to come break up my fight with my ex-boyfriend.

His lips are as warm as ever.

"What was that for?" he asks, smiling at me.

"Nothing. I just missed you."

Edward's watching us carefully. I'm surprised he's not making jokes like I always do about him and Bella. But I guess that's Edward I'm-Always-Serious Cullen for you.

"Can we get out of here?" Jacob asks me quietly.

I nod. "Yeah. Mom and Charlie are leaving soon. We might as well." My stomach flutters as I realize that tonight's going to be my first night in my house with it as my house. Well, the pack's house. Mom and Charlie are going to their new house.

* * *

We drive back in Bella's Ferrari. She lent it to Jacob and me for today. I think she was trying to be sisterly or whatever, but mostly it was for Jacob, since he loves this car. I watch him shift gears and yes, the muscles in his arm stand out a bit more than usual, like he's gripping the gearshift too hard. I touch his arm though and he smiles at me, that strained smile.

"Jacob, are you alright?"

"I don't know. I… I could have killed him," he says quietly and I don't ask him any more questions after that. He pulls into my driveway and before he can take off his seatbelt, I am kissing him. It starts out innocently—I genuinely want to make him feel better. And then… I don't know what happens. It's not even an appropriate time, is it, since all this Sam trouble? But kissing him makes me _want _him. It's the way he smells, how warm he is, how he tastes, and how… well, how _male_ he is. I wonder briefly if when Edward said he was extra-Alpha-y if that means that he's releasing more pheromones than usual or something.

Because I'm very slowly, without really noticing, crawling into his lap.

He breaks the kiss and pushes me back. In an instant his seatbelt is undone and he's out of the car. I scramble after him. "I really hope you weren't just teasing me," he says, and his voice, oh god, it sounds like it did earlier, when he was facing off against Sam. Well, not exactly. Low, but…well, I suppose the word is husky (I am sure Emmett would love a dog pun like that).

Jacob's voice right now sounds like sex to me.

He doesn't say anything as he pulls me into my room. Before I have time to register what's going on, he's got me pinned against the door and he's kissing me, hard, as hard as he's ever kissed me. It's like when he came back from Canada, after he fought Sam, the first time we were lovers…

…except it's not. It's…_more_. I don't know what else to say about it. His hands are in my hair. I can't even really move. But it doesn't matter, because soon he picks me up. I love it when he does that… I wrap my legs around his waist, which makes my dress ride up on my hips. We're still kissing and I know I must be trembling or maybe he is, or maybe it's my imagination and all the pent-up sexual frustration of the last few weeks… Thank god no one is home. I'm tired of being quiet, of being careful, of worrying about every little thing. He carries me to the bed and it's getting very hard for me to think. His right hand is on me, touching me, kneading, and his left is rummaging in my nightstand to where he keeps the condoms. But it's all a blur. For some reason I'm trying to make myself think, stay focused, not give in, because I'm worried if I do stop thinking I won't ever come back out of it. But it's not working.

I know I want him. That's all my brain will process right now. I _need_ him, I need this. I'm not paying any attention to anything. I don't notice him take off his jacket, but I see it crumpled on the floor. Shit, I really need to take off my dress. Or my heels. They are kind of painful now, after walking around in them all day. And just as I'm reaching down to mess with the buckle, he has me on my back. He's pushing my dress up, and then I'm not wearing any panties, and I don't know if he's taken them off or torn them off, and I don't care, because we're both still pretty clothed but I guess he's in a hurry.

It's nowhere near as gentle as the last time. As it normally is. I put one hand on his shoulders and cling to him, digging my fingernails in against fabric of his shirt, but with the other, I push back against my headboard, knot my fingers around one of the bars. Because otherwise I will hit my head. He's bracing himself up with his hands, the veins standing out on his forearms, and I think about how strong he is, well, the thought crosses my mind, but I'm not thinking about much, and then he takes one of his hands and touches me, runs it down my side, and holds my hip. His fingers are digging in, and I wonder if it will bruise, and even if it does, I will heal quickly, and it seems fair, since my nails are pressing crescent moon shaped cuts into his back through his shirt, which if I actually draw blood, will very likely be ruined.

I'm losing focus, and I'm not usually like this, usually I can tell what the hell I'm doing, but oh god, Jacob, and I wrap my legs around his waist and moan his name, or at least the first syllable of it. Usually that drives him wild, makes him shudder against me, but it doesn't affect him at all tonight, and I don't know if it's because he has nothing else to give or if it's because he doesn't hear me, doesn't register what I'm saying. But all the friction and I'm finished, and hard, but he's not. I try to still press my hips against his, to kiss his neck, but I'm too tired. And then he's finished and he falls against my chest.

His head is on my breasts and he's just laying there. I wonder if he's going to pass out. I wonder if I'm going to pass out. He's not moving and I don't know if I should be worried or not. I reach down as best as I can with him pinning me to the bed and I pull the comforter over us. Really, I should probably be taking my dress off, but that's a little hard with a werewolf on top of me.

So instead I just stroke his hair and start to fall asleep.

* * *

"Leah, Leah, are you alright?" Jacob is asking me. And he's kissing my face as he asks, little pecks all over my neck and cheeks. Sooooo tired. Can't open eyes.

"Wha? Yeah, uh huh. Sleep."

"Leah, please, I am so sorry," he's saying, touching my face now, softly. What's he upset about? God I'm _tired_.

"Jake, 'sfine."

"No, it's not fine. Leah, I hurt you, and—"

I'm starting to come to. Instead of a vague Jacob-shaped blob, I can actually distinguish him. "I'm fine," I say again, this time more clearly. "Jake, what are you freaking out about?"

"I…I hurt you."

"What? No, you didn't hurt me," I say, shaking my head and rolling my eyes. What the hell is he talking about? I obviously just want to sleep. It's kind of been a stressful day.

"I don't know what happened."

I open my eyes and look at him again. "Did you chug champagne when I wasn't looking and black out? We had sex. Then we fell asleep."

"I'm so sorry, Leah, I—"

"Jake!" I say forcefully. Seriously. Boy needs to calm down. "Honestly. You didn't hurt me."

"I don't know what I was doing. I just…couldn't control myself…"

"Yeah, I have that effect on men. Now can we please go to sleep?"

"Leah, will you listen to me?"

"Well," I say in a slightly patronizing tone. I really don't mean to be a bitch, not to Jacob, but I'm tired. "I don't understand what you're freaking out about."

"I could have hurt you."

"Not likely."

"Werewolves are strong," he says. "I'm strong." I hit him upside the head.

"Oh, and what am I? Not a werewolf?"

"No, that's not what I meant…you're….you, know, a girl."

"Right. I'm a girl. I'm glad we have that sorted out. I'm also a werewolf."

"Leah, I never want to hurt you. Ever."

"Well, that's good, but you didn't, and you won't, so you can stop freaking out."

"I…I wasn't thinking. I wasn't thinking about anything."

"—do you usually think about stuff during sex? Like 'oh, I should buy more milk?' Because I will be really upset."

"Will you just listen to me?" he asks, frustration in his voice as much as it is in mine. "It was like I wasn't in my own head. It was, this will sound crazy, but it's like when we phase and sometimes it's harder to think about things, because we're too busy being wolves."

"Okay, not crazy. Slightly _creepy_ though."

"Now do you see why I'm freaking out?"

"Because you think that having sex with me is like running around as a wolf?" I ask, eyes narrowed.

"No! Because I just…lost myself."

I'm really, really tempted to say, "It's called an orgasm," but I don't. See, I do have _some _self-restraint. "Jacob, really, I…"

"Leah, today, I was _so angry_. I honestly wanted to kill Sam. Like, I really hated him."

I shrug and adjust the comforter.

"Okay, yeah, I know you're not like his biggest fan or anything, but he's actually a decent guy."

"Yeah, Sam's great," I say.

"No, okay, shitty ex-boyfriend, yes, but as a person, you know, he's, he's decent. But…I only think that when I'm not around him. The second I see him, I just want to tear him to shreds."

"It's the Alpha thing," I say, and he rolls his eyes at me. Well, at least he's recovered his sense of humor.

"No, really? I thought it was because I'm jealous of his fashion sense. Yes, obviously it's the Alpha thing. I just don't know how long I can deal with this."

"A fortnight, right? I mean, you two are going to fight it out, so it's not going to be an issue anymore."

"I guess…." His voice trails off. "I don't even want to fight him. I don't like that I hate him. I don't like feeling like I have no control over myself. And then seeing him _with you_. I mean, I know that you're my girlfriend now, but I just felt….really territorial. And it's horrible because I know that I have no reason to be like that. It's just—"

"Hormones." I finish, and then we're both quiet. He's holding me now, and petting my hair. At least he finally calmed down.

"I know what you mean though," I say, and he looks at me. "I feel like that, too. Like, I was getting over Sam, getting over being hurt, when he married Emily. I thought I stopped hating him. Like all of a sudden he wasn't worth any of my strong emotions. But then…well, any time I see him and he tries to give me patronizing life advice, I just lose it. I was really angry today, too, Jake. I don't think you noticed, but Emmett was restraining me and Jasper was keeping me calm."

"Me too. Jasper I mean, not Emmett, obviously."

"I don't know why I lose my temper with Sam so easily," I start, and he smiles.

"You've got the gene."

"What?"

"Two doses. You. You've got the Alpha gene from both sides."

"Oh, right. I'm such an Alpha male and all."

"You kinda are," he says. "You said it years ago, when you first joined my 'crappy little renegade pack' as you called it."

"Good Alpha genes, both of us," I say, and put my head on his chest. "We could breed a race of mini-Alphas. Your dad would love that."

He laughs, and I hear it rumble around in his chest. It makes me smile. "You know, like the other day, he was giving me this lecture on the joys of fatherhood."

I giggle and then stop. "Jake, you know I'm infertile, right? I mean, I know you and Billy think I have magical lurking eggs, but I'm infertile. I'm never going to have children." I was trying to make it a joke, but my voice breaks at the end. Why am I so emotional about this? I don't even _want _children. I hate the little bastards.

"Leah," he says, and puts his hand on my face. "I know. And I don't care. It's just my dad being crazy. I'm not expecting you to grow out of your infertility or anything. Really. I don't, like, secretly love children. I'm not _Quil_."

And I laugh at that.

* * *

Is he alright now? He's smiling, that's a good sign.

* * *

It's morning and the Pack is all over. "Man, I miss mom's cooking," Seth says, sprawled across the sofa (we got to keep some of the furniture. The house is a bit bare though. And I shudder to think what it will look like when Seth, Quil and Embry start decorating.)

"Dweeb, she's been gone _one day_," I tell him, but my stomach is rumbling. I go to the fridge and grab a pint of ice cream.

"Where's mine?" asks Embry, grinning at me.

"Buy your own damn ice cream," I tell him, and start feasting on Chunky Monkey. The elephant in the center of the room right now is Jacob. He's sitting in an armchair staring into space. If anyone speaks to him, he responds. He looks massively lost in… well, actually, he doesn't even look lost in thought. More… brain damaged (still hot though). I go and sit on the armrest.

"Ew, P.D.A.," says Embry and Quil looks away.

"Yes, because my living room is what I would consider _public_."

"It's our living room too, now, and so keep the display of affection to a minimal. No one wants to see you two being all touchy," Embry says. Keep in mind I'm not even touching Jacob.

"What?" Jake says, blinking. "Sorry. What are we talking about?"

"Nothing, boss," says Seth. I offer Jacob some ice cream but he shakes his head.

I'm munching away happily when someone starts knocking on the front door. Quil, who hasn't moved any of this stuff in yet and I think isn't even sure yet if he wants to live in the Jake-Leah House of Sin, jumps up to answer it. Two seconds later he comes back with Jared.

Jake's muscles tense the instant he walks into the room.

"Can I talk to you?" Jared asks.

"Yeah," says Jake, his voice lower than it was seconds before.

Jared waits and arches an eyebrow. No one does anything.

"Alone?" he adds, finally.

Jacob snorts. "Whatever you want to say to me, you can say in front of my pack."

"Sam said—"

"Sam's not here. He sent his beta. Don't expect me to talk to you one-on-one. _You_ certainly aren't an Alpha."

Jared's nostrils flare. And Jacob's got that look in his eyes, the intense one he gets when Sam's around. This could get bad. I stand up.

"Right. I'm just going to go outside then. Boys?" I say to Quil, Embry and Seth. They follow me out. Jake is watching Jared, but Jared is watching me, or rather, us.

As we go out to the backyard, Seth mutters, "Kinda makes me want to wander around the Rez wearing all one color and snapping my fingers menacingly at Sam's Pack."

Embry looks confused, but Quil just turns to Seth and says, "Dude, did you _seriously _just make a West Side Story reference?"

* * *

So Jake worked out the details. He's going to fight Sam. For real. Two weeks.

I hope Jake's okay. Not that I am worried that Sam stands any chance against him, that's not what scares me. It's the way Jacob looks when anyone mentions Sam. It's gotten a lot worse since the wedding. Hell, it hasn't been great since he came back from Canada. I keep expecting it to get better, for him to not look like he's not in his own mind. It was sort of bad when he first became an Alpha, but it got better. He and Sam could stand each other. Now, though, it's worse than it ever was, with no sign of going away.

When we're together, just the two of us, he's okay. He hasn't forgotten himself since the night after the wedding. Actually, he's sort of overcompensating by being really sweet and I wish he'd stop. I'm not Bella, not made of glass.

But when we aren't making love, or aren't cuddled up in my too-small bed, he stares off into space.

He hasn't told me what he's thinking about.

I'm scared to ask.

* * *

And my mom is coming over to the Cullens'. I don't know who is more nervous, her or Charlie, now that he knows their deep, dark, bloody (ha ha) secret. He knows about the skeletons in the closet (Wow, I kill myself. I bet the only Cullen who has ever had an actual skeleton in his closet is Jasper.) Actually, I guess I'm slightly inappropriate. We're driving there now, me, Dweeb, Mom and Charlie, and Mom asks from the front seat, "Should I have brought anything?"

"Bloody Mary mix?" I suggest. Seth makes a choking noise and bites his lip. The car is silent.

"That's not funny, Leah," my mom says. Charlie looks kind of blanched, just like his undead daughter.

"Really, mom, because I just suck the laughter right out of myself."

"Leah, stop it," my little spineless brother hisses.

Charlie parks the car on the Cullens' massive driveway. No one is outside, you know, dragging animal carcasses back form the woods or anything. Must all be inside.

I swing open the car door and run to the porch. Seth get there right after me, but Charlie and Mom are walking slowly together up the path. Jesus, they're acting like they're going to a funeral. Damnit, now I'm giggling again. Mom gives me The Look. But it can't be _that _awkward, I mean, we were all together at the wedding last week.

Then again, it was hard for me to be here, at first, in their Crypt. But Mom's not as sensitive to their smell as I am…. Although she is an Elder. This must be practically blasphemous for her.

The door swings open (no creak, too bad) and it's Bella, looking all unearthly beautiful. She smiles at them. Nessie pushes out from behind her and runs down to her grandfather. Esme is out next welcoming my mother. Then Carlisle, looking like he just fell out of a Hugo Boss advertisement.

And then we're all inside. All things considered, it's not as awkward as I'd thought it would be. There's trays of snacks, normal-looking snacks, set around, which my brother and I are busy devouring. Mom looks like she's trying to decide whether or not to correct our manners. She's calmed down a lot, especially now that she realizes there aren't coffins lying around or bats or something.

She does look a bit sick when she sees me sitting in between Rosalie and Alice.

Seth, Charlie and Emmett are all engrossed in watching the game. Edward seems to be half-watching, out of politeness. Jasper is talking heatedly with his niece about something.

"So?" Rosalie is whispering, in what she probably doesn't actually believe is a subtle manner.

I smirk and raise my eyebrows. Edward glares at us from across the room.

"Oh, come off it, Edward, we didn't even say anything," says Rosalie.

"Yes, but I know what you just asked her, and I know what her little eyebrow thing meant," he retorts.

"Surely, after living with Emmett for 50 years, you are not so easily shocked," I tell him.

"Oh, Leah, there's something I wanted to ask you," Rosalie says, all full of enthusiasm.

"Shoot."

"Will you be my maid of honor?" she asks. I nearly choke on cheese and cracker I was eating.

"What?"

"All these weddings…your mom and Charlie, Bella and Edward, and Jackass and your cousin," (I love that about Rosalie. She never gets tired of hating my ex-boyfriend) "it makes me want get married. I mean, I'll need months if not over a year to put everything together, of course, but I was wondering if you would be my maid of honor?"

"Rosalie, I'm honored," I say.

"Good. Now," and then she pulls out a stack of bridal magazines from the side of the sofa and spreads them on the coffee table in front of us (I move the snack plate to my lap.) "What do you think of these?"

She and Alice start showing me about seven thousand photographs of different dresses. Alice seems to be leaning on the classy side; Rosalie's choices are all quite sexy. I say this.

"Yes, well, last time, I had a huge bell skirt. This time I want something tighter. And I'm thinking a tiara instead of a full veil," Rosalie says, pulling out what appears to be a tiara catalogue from the stack. "Oh! You know what would help? You haven't seen my old photos, have you?" with that, she runs off upstairs. I have, actually, seen a few of her wedding photos—she has some framed in her and Emmett's suite of rooms.

In half a minute she's back, clutching a massive scrapbook-y photo album thing. She, Alice and I spend the next 20 minutes oohing and ahhing over all her old dresses. Emmett looks about the same in every wedding.

After we've been here long enough for my mom to look like she's almost enjoying herself (not about to throw up, basically) chatting with Carlisle and Esme, Jacob arrives. I smile at him as he comes in, and he winks at me.

Before he makes it to my couch (Wedding central), Nessie intercepts him. He lifts her in his massive hands, and she looks her actual age for once, so tiny next to him. He smiles at her, that ridiculous Jacob-smile he has, where he looks so completely happy and relaxed. He _is _kind of like a puppy, sometimes.

The door opens again, and Embry enters. God, how did Jacob get him to come? And then, behind Embry, is… Quil. Damn.

Pack unity?

Quil and Embry look about as sick as my mom did awhile ago, even though they've been here (forced to be here) before. Embry practically runs over to grab the empty chair by the TV and stares, with an insane focus, at the game. His nose is wrinkled from the blood-sucker smell.

Quil, meanwhile, is just standing there.

"What's that on your face?" Emmett asks, smirking at him.

"Hm?" says Quil, clearly shocked that one of the leeches is talking to him. His hand goes up to his cheek, where there's some kind of glitter or something. I wouldn't have noticed it if Emmett hadn't said anything. "Oh, that… right. Uh. Claire…my…um….imprint….

I was with her today, and she's sort of going through a princess phase, and that's from her glitter….um, wand."

Seth, during Quil's little monologue, has scooted over on the sofa so that there's room for Quil to sit down next to Seth instead of next to Edward.

"What makes you think it's a phase?" Emmett asks.

"What?"

"What makes you think it's a princess _phase_?" and he glances in our direction, to where Rosalie and Alice are heatedly debating the pros and cons of various tiara styles. I giggle, and for some reason, my eyes slide over to where Jacob is with Nessie. He's laughing too, at something she's said. He looks so happy.

And then, suddenly, I realize what I have to do.

* * *

A/N: Please review! Also, my work load over the last two weeks was extra bad, but that means it will be extra not-bad (I won't say light) next week, so _perhaps_ I shall be able to update again more quickly. But if I don't get a chance, just trust me that I will not abandon it!


	8. Chapter 8

Author's Note:

Hello! Thank you for waiting (patiently?) for this chapter. At last, 3 happy things are all occurring at once: me having a finished and edited chapter, me having internet, and not acting in it's "special" way.

Again, thank you everyone for the reviews! Not only do they let me know you're enjoying it (and thank you to everyone who has put this on their favorite's list as well!) but they let me know what you're thinking and what you want to see (such as more with the Cullens, etc) I miss the Cullens too! That was one of the most fun parts of writing Endless Daylight, and I've tried to have them show up here as much as possible, but it's a bit difficult when the point of this one was supposed to be Leah and the pack… (I may have mentioned this before, but while I was writing Endless Daylight, I suddenly thought, "Hm, a Jake/Leah romance should probably address what's going on at La Push…"

Also, can I just give a quick apology for ending the last chapter on a cliff-hanger? I didn't mean to make you all (well, some of you) angry. Chapter 6 ended as a cliff-hanger and I got a lot of good feedback for that. Adds a bit of excitement, you know? Also, there really wasn't any other place to end it last time. I could have left off the last line but then it would be a bit strange since it would just end with her watching Jacob and Nessie play.

Lastly, Endless77 has begun translating "Endless Daylight" into French! The first chapter is up and the fic is called "Lumière du Jour Infinie" and if you speak French, you should definitely check it out!

* * *

Scott is just looking at me with his big, ridiculous eyes. I look back. He blinks. I blink. God, why am I not asleep? It's 2:30 in the morning, or thereabout. I can here the boys and the gunfire noises from their stupid game.

Jacob isn't back yet.

I left early from the Cullens' house. And by early, I mean I left when my mother and Charlie and the boys did. So maybe it's better to say Jacob stayed late? I probably should have waited with him. Or should I have? Maybe I was right to leave.

I didn't want to intrude.

"Yes, Scott, I know it's late," I say, and the dog blinks again and makes a little noise. Mom doesn't approve of him on the bed, but guess what? My mother doesn't live here now. Hence why there is a Pulp Fiction poster hanging in the living room where Mom's Monet print used to be. And another one of Fight Club next to the backdoor. I have drawn the line at girls in underwear though. Seriously. If my house starts to resemble a fraternity, there _will _be consequences. Embry's already started leaving his jeans lying around. (Does that mean he's walking around with no jeans? God, I really don't want to think about that.)

"Look, if you're so tired, _you _go to sleep," I tell him and he yawns. "Yeah, exactly. Don't wait up on my account." Me and Scott. A good pair. Been through a lot together. A lot of time at each other's sides. Scott will always be there for me. That's the point of dogs over men. They come when you call them.

Werewolf men seem to have all the bad points of dogs and none of the good points.

I lay down in the bed and try to cuddle my pillow. It isn't as warm as Jacob. Too soft, as well.

I wish he'd come home. But that's just me being selfish. Typical Leah behavior. But I really do want him to be happy. And he's happy spending time with Nessie. He grins. He laughs. He's… himself again. How he used to be, before the Alpha tension got like this. He's not that way around me, not anymore. We've made love again, since the wedding, and it wasn't like that, that…intense. Not that I would have minded… God, what am I saying? He hated himself afterward.

But at least he was with _me_, just me, not thinking about anything else.

No… that's not true. He wasn't like that because of me, he was like that because of Sam. Shit.

I say the "shit" part out loud and Scott looks at me again. This latest realization on my part deepens my commitment to my plan. Jake is two different people, now. He's one when he's with Nessie—the happy Jake, how he used to be. And I can't blame him for that. It isn't his fault, not something he _did_. Something that was done to him.

I doubt there's anyone alive who hates imprinting as much as I do.

And the second Jacob is the one here at La Push. The one who is becoming an Alpha, will soon be the only Alpha, once he beats Sam. And yes, I do think he will beat Sam, I don't think Sam has a chance against him. It's the second Jacob that should be mine, the one I will get to be with when Nessie and the leeches leave. But that Jake isn't mine, either. In some really weird, twisted, screwed up way, he's _Sam's_. When Sam's around, Jacob can't think about anything else but ripping his throat out. And when Nessie's around, all he wants to do is make her happy.

I don't mind Jake when he's in Alpha mode. Maybe it's because I'm a wolf myself. I can comfort him and help him look after the pack, and god, it's not like he could ever hurt me even if he looses control of himself like after the wedding. The problem is that Jacob doesn't like himself when he's like that.

When you love someone, and yes, Jesus, I can't believe I'm saying this, alright, I think I love him, I love Jacob Black…Anyway, when you love someone, you want them to be happy.

Jake can't stay here. He can't fight Sam. If he fights Sam, he'll be stuck here as the Alpha. He has to leave….He has to leave when the Cullens leave. Nessie is his imprint—she can give him peace of mind. Not too many weeks ago, I was walking through the forest with Nessie talking about Jake. She said she liked us together, liked that he _chose_ me. But what do either of us know? I can't let Jake choose to be unhappy.

So how the _fuck _am I going to tell him? Or even more to the point, _what_ am I going to tell him? Why would he even listen to me—if he's in freaky Sam's-Ass-kicking mode, is he even going to want to listen to anything I have to say about him not fighting Sam?

And I'm selfish, so selfish. I want Jacob like I haven't wanted anything before, ever. When I look at him, I see the space around him, and know that I should be in it. That he's _mine_. I can't not look at him. I can't not touch him.

I am going to have to wait until right before the fight.

And then what? "Hey, babe, go off with Nessie, you know, the Spawn? I know I said you'd have to fight Sam and all, but actually, I think it's a much better plan for you to just run away and play nanny to Bella's daughter."

Yeah, that's going to go over well.

Shit.

I ask Scott what to do, but mostly he just gives me a look that suggests he doesn't appreciate me waking him up just as soon as he'd fallen asleep. My clock tells me its 3:03. The gunfire is dying away. Seth and Embry and Quil must be going to bed soon. I still haven't figured out if Quil lives here now or what. I think he just sleeps sometimes in Seth's old room. Yeah, Seth's taken over the master bedroom. He offered it to me but I said no. That'd be a bit weird, sharing a bed with Jacob in my parents' old room. That, and it'd be a bit too…like Jake and I were the parents of this Pack. What are we, Sam and Emily?

Jesus, why the hell isn't Jake home yet? Maybe he's left the Cullens' and has gone back to his own room at Billy's house? Maybe he's spending the night at the Crypt, and even now he's curled up on his dog bed?

Maybe I should stop obsessing and go to sleep.

Why do I even want to see him tonight? So I can break up with him now?

Ah, we've returned to the point about me being selfish. I'll wait until right before the fight. Not because it's best for him, but because it will give me one more week of Jacob.

* * *

Jacob does come home to me. It's 5 am and he's climbing into my bed. Scott's whimpering outside the door. I wake up as Jake pulls back the comforter and slides me over, toward the wall. He knows I like sleeping with him between me and the room. He once said it was cute, a girl as tough as I am, liking to be protected. I hit him for that, and told him that wasn't why I like that side of the bed, even though it is.

He's shirtless, of course. And then he presses his body against me and I realize he's naked. He's kissing my neck, and between kisses, whispers, "Sorry I'm late."

"Mmmm" I say, meaning some combination of "I just woke up, leave me the hell alone," and "oh god yes."

I want to ask him where he was, but instead I grab a fistful of his hair and pull him up to kiss my mouth.

"Why do you even bother wearing pajamas to bed?" he asks, between kisses, sounding annoyed.

"I don't know, maybe because I live in a house full of male werewolves."

"One of whom is your brother, the other of whom, is Quil, who, let's be honest, doesn't count. So I guess the only one you have to worry about is Embry…" and then his mouth is back on mine, and it's hot and warm and god, I can't give this up, can't give him up. Screw it all, I can't let him leave with Nessie. He belongs here, in my arms, in my bed, at my side, with his pack….

"Oh, I don't know, there's another guy who almost lives here now, and I think he might like me," I say into his mouth.

"Really?" he asks as he pushes my tank top up past my ribs.

"Mmm."

"What's he like?" Jacob asks, his calloused hands on me. It's funny, we don't scar, and our wounds heal quickly, but we all have calluses on our hands from running around on wolf-paws so much.

"Well, to start with, he's my Alpha…" I start, but I can't say anymore, because I'm his breath is so hot on my neck.

"Then it probably doesn't matter whether or not you wear anything to bed, silly girl."

"Why?" I manage to ask.

"Because Alphas tend to take what then want in any case."

And that's the last thing I can really remember either of us saying.

* * *

It shouldn't be this easy. Making love to someone you know you can't be with. He should be able to tell when I kiss him that I'm saying goodbye, when I touch him that I'm memorizing the contours of his muscles, when I press myself against him afterwards, make him hold me tight while we fall asleep, that I'm trying to burn the feeling of him into my memory… but he can't. He can't tell.

* * *

The days are all the same, now. Everyone's waiting for the fight. Rosalie tells me Bella and Edward and Nessie have been out almost every day, probably looking for somewhere to move. I hadn't really wondered until now where they'll go. To be honest, nothing would really surprise me. Alaska? Antarctica? New Jersey?

I can't think too much about where they'll be because then I'll have to think about how far away from me will Jacob be.

A better question is where _I_ will be. I'm sure as hell not staying here in La Push with Sam! Maybe Montana or Wyoming, some place I could have some space to run. Scott would like that. I could always go back to Cananda…emigrate legally instead of just running across the border as a wolf. Get me some socialized healthcare, not that I need it.

The fight is going to be on Sunday. That's the date the boys picked at the Wedding. Today is Wednesday. I _really _should tell Jacob not to fight Sam. Can I leave it until Saturday? That will give me today, Thursday, Friday with him. I should tell him sooner, but I can't. I don't even know if he'll listen. What if he fights Sam anyway, even though when he's not around Sam, he doesn't want to? I could talk to Emmett and Edward and Jasper, tell them to restrain him. Keep him from going to the fight Sunday morning.

I pick up my cell phone and call Rosalie. I tell her about my plan to keep Jacob and Sam from fighting.

"…because Jake doesn't want to. It's not that he's scared; we all know he'll win. But then he'll be the Alpha of both packs, and he doesn't want that."

Rosalie is silent for a moment. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, so could you talk to him for me? He's the only person I know strong enough to hold Jake back."

Again, she's silent. Shit, please, let her not guess how much I'm not saying. I didn't tell her about my plan to make him go with Nessie. I know she'd never agree.

"Okay, Leah, yeah, I will say something to Emmett tonight," she says at last.

The day passes, like the others before it, and when Jake and I have collapsed in each other's arms, he clings to me, his arms around my waist, holding me right up against him. He's shaking.

"Are you alright?" I ask.

"Yeah, it's just… it's so soon."

That's all he says. I want to tell him it will be alright, but I don't. It's enough for me to know that it will be alright, for him. For me, too, if I run far enough.

* * *

I have to tell him. I have to break up with Jacob. Now. Because oh god, if I put it off any longer, I won't be able to.

Today is Friday.

I need to clear my head. I throw on shorts and a tank top and run to the forest. Maybe if I run around as a wolf for a bit I can get my thoughts in order.

* * *

I run. It feels good. Like I'm actually doing something. I don't think about where I'm going, and I end up at the place I usually come to think. It's the place I went after Jacob left and after Sam's wedding. The place where Jake first kissed me.

Everything would be perfect, if not for the smell. Oh. Great. It's Edward. Sneaky bastard didn't even make a noise coming up.

"Leah, you can't do this," he tells me. I glare at him and narrow my eyes.

_Edward, why are you here?_ I throw in a growl for good measure.

"To stop you from doing just about the stupidest thing you could do."

_I don't see how it's any of your business_. Awkward place for a conversation, but I suppose he couldn't corner me at my house, being that he's not allowed on the Rez. Thank god.

"Don't you get it? I've made the mistake that you're about to. It will kill you both."

_Melodramatic, much?_ I snark, rolling my eyes. But he ignores me.

"Don't be an idiot," he says, and I think that's a funny thing for someone married to Bella to say. I know he hears it in my thoughts but aside from giving me an annoyed glare, he doesn't respond. No, instead he keeps lecturing me. Who does he think he is, Sam?

"Leah, I'm serious. Leaving Jacob would be the biggest mistake you've ever made."

_Who said I was going to leave him?_

"Damnit! I hear what you are thinking!" he almost shouts. Birds startle out of a tree nearby. I think that's the first time I've heard the boy swear.

_He's miserable!_ I tell him, because, shit, why not be honest, if he's just going to read my mind anyway? _The only time he's happy is when he's with Nessie! I am doing this for his own good!_

"First of all, that's bul—that's ridiculous. Jacob is _happy _when he's with _you_. Second of all, you can't make someone stop loving you! And never, ever, leave a person who loves you and whom you love 'for their own good.' It doesn't work!" There's an edge to his voice that I haven't heard before. It sounds like… well, like borderline panic.

_Damnit, Edward! _ I shout, _you can't just make everything about you and Bella. For once in eternity, this isn't about you and Bella!_

"What's it about then?" he answers, no less passion in his voice, "You being miserable? You are bound and determined to be alone—fine. But don't hurt other people with your insistence on suffering!"

_Hurt others? Remind me again, _leech_, who I am hurting?_

He rolls his eyes. "Jacob. You're hurting Jacob. Like I hurt Bella. No one deserves that."

I draw in a deep breath and try a different tack. Shit, why am I even talking about this with the loveleech? I should tell him to go back to his coffin or whatever. _He can't stay here and be Alpha. That isn't what he wants_, I tell him.

"No. That isn't."

_He isn't himself when he's around Sam._

Edward seems to get a grip on himself and says, more calmly, "Carlisle thinks that after the fight, his testosterone levels should drop a bit and he'll go back to normal."

_He doesn't want to be the La Push Alpha. He doesn't want Sam's pack. He has to leave with you and your family. That's the only way._

"Are you so determined to see him with Nessie?" Edward asks me, his voice even quieter. He's staring at me intensely. Shit, his eyes are blackish, obsidian, and it shouldn't frighten me, but it does, almost. I'm just used to seeing the leeches all golden-eyed.

_You know that's not what I_ _want_, I say, but he cuts me off.

"So don't do it. Don't leave him. Stay with him. Tell him you love him. Marry him."

And a thousand thoughts go through my mind. All the things I've been thinking for the last few days. About Nessie being Jacob's imprint, about how now one can fight imprinting, ever. About how Jake only wants me right now because Nessie is still a child. About how I shouldn't try to come between them, or it will be like with Sam, only worse. About all the things that will be better about Jacob's life if he's with Nessie than if he's with me—she can give him children, and even though they'd be weird little half-vampires, half-werewolves, at least they'd be children, and about how he wouldn't have to fight against himself anymore, he'd be complete—

"_Stop!_" Edward says suddenly, and presses a hand to his temple. "I can't take anymore! I wish I had Jasper with me, to perk you up a bit!"

_It's all true, though,_ I say, trying to sound nonchalant. Casual. Like this isn't hurting me.

"No, it isn't. You're being ridiculous. People have been asking you ever since you got together how this was going to work, and the whole time, you haven't been worried about Nessie, or any of this—"

_Yes, I have_, I tell him. He should know that there was always that grain of fear.

"Yes, well, but only a very small little part of you, Leah. And that had less to do with you actually thinking Jacob and Nessie were soulmates, because you _never _believed that, not until now, all of a sudden, for some unknown reason. Back then you were just worried about being left again, being hurt."

I can't really shrug in this form, so I shake my head in the lupine equivalent.

"We are all insecure, in love," Edward says, "But Jacob wants _you_. Everyone knows it. Nessie certainly knows it. Don't be an idiot and make the same mistake I did."

I look at him. Doesn't he understand at all? This isn't about what Jacob _wants_. This is about what Jacob _needs_.

"Do you hear yourself?" he asks me. "Not about what he wants? Oh, right, Miss Clearwater, I forgot how much you loved imprinting and the whole concept of not having a choice! Because that's what this is. This is you saying that Jacob shouldn't have a choice in who he is with, because he imprinted _against his will_ and now he can't ever have the one person that will make him truly happy! Even _my daughter _has told you this! When are you going to stop feeling sorry for yourself and listen to us?"

_No, do you hear_ yourself_?_ I ask. I'm getting angry, now. I was before, too, but there are always new levels to my anger. _I thought you _wanted_ him with Nessie?_

"Of course I want him with Nessie!" He almost shouts. "Yes! That's exactly what I want! I want her to marry him! Do you know why?"

_Why?_

"Because he is devoted to her! He truly loves her, and it's pure! Even more pure than how I love Bella! And then no mortal boy will ever hurt her! No boy will ever break her heart! She will never know pain, or suffering, or rejection, she will never wonder if there's someone out there for her, she will never be alone! She won't spend a hundred years watching as those closest to her find true love, wondering if she's too different, if there's no one out there for her!"

For a vampire, he managed to put a lot of emotion into that little speech. I wonder if we're still talking about Nessie, or if we're talking about Edward, before he met Bella.

He stops himself and regards me. "I don't want my little girl to live the same kind of life I did before I met her mother, that's all."

_Then why are you here?_ I ask. It seems like a good question.

"Because that's not what she wants."

_She's a child— _I start.

"Not really. And she doesn't _want _to be. She wants to live. And for some reason, I can only guess it's because of her relationship with you and my sister, she believes that to be alive is to be in pain."

What the hell kind of emo drama is this? _So you're telling me to stay with Jacob so your daughter can be in pain like she wants?_

"No, and stop being intentionally dumb," he says. "I want you to stay with Jacob, because if you don't, he will spend eternity loving my daughter. And she will spend eternity loving him. They won't have any choice, as you say, because of the imprinting. They will be each other's everything. And yes, as a father, there's a very large part of me that wants that. But Nessie wants a life of her own. That's what this whole going-to-school scheme is about. Getting out of Forks. Meeting people her age, but by that, of course, I mean people who are the age she looks physically. She wants to socialize with people who aren't vampires or the occasional shapeshifter. Leah, she told me she wants to cry over something other than the ending of "The Glass Menagerie" and be cynical about something other than _The Way We Live Now_. Of course I don't want my daughter to cry or to be cynical! But I want her to be happy, and to be truly happy, she needs to have her own life. If she and Jacob deepen their relationship, they will cease to be individuals!"

_Isn't it too late? They've imprinted. Whether or not they end up married or whatever doesn't seem like it should matter._

"It does, though. Alice was starting to see Nessie in her visions, remember? As soon as you came into Jacob's life, that is, as soon as you and Jacob started your relationship, Alice started seeing Nessie. But after you were all at our house the other night, she stopped. She hasn't seen anything with Nessie, not a single flash. Not that she could ever see anything big, but now, it's like how it was when Nessie was just a baby. Nessie and Jacob can stay imprinted. And they can be together, or apart—his little Canadian vacation showed that. Jacob needs to stay here. With you."

_That makes no sense, whatsoever._

"Jacob loves _you_! He wants to be with _you_! And yes, he and Nessie are both happier when they are near, but letting them be together without you there would deprive them both of their ability to choose."

I want to believe what Edward says. I want to believe it could work, that I could be with Jacob, and that he could be happy, and that we could spend our unnatural lives together, and that he would never, ever leave me for Nessie. But I can't. It's too perfect. Nothing in life is that perfect. Maybe for Edward and Bella, but not for me.

"Weren't you the one who wanted me to stop making everything about me and Bella?" Edward asks, almost smiling. I glare at him. "You're the one who thinks Bella and I are creepy, who hates seeing how Emily and Sam act around each other. Aren't you the one who hates the idea of being the entire world for one person? Don't you prefer Rosalie and Emmett, or Alice and Jasper? So why do you refuse to be with Jacob?" he takes a deep breath, a nice little affectation, considering he doesn't need the oxygen, and starts again, "I actually agree with you about Sam and Emily. No one can be anyone's everything. It's not… normal. I know, you think Bella and I are that way, but we aren't. Not since Nessie was born. _Nessie_ completed us… and even before that, we had my family. It's like Carlisle and Esme…they need a family around them to be complete. Like you and Jake needing your Pack. And who knows, maybe the baby will change things for Sam and Emily, make them less…focused. Obsessed." He pauses again and looks at me.

"It's not even really Emily, you know. It's mostly Sam. Hearing his thoughts is unsettling, to say the least. She's literally the only thing he can think about. Well, that, and fighting Jacob."

_I know what Sam's thoughts are like_, I snap. I do. Hearing him think about her that much was basically the definition of hell.

"I know you do. But you don't know Emily's. Hers are more…subdued. I think maybe it's because of Sam's relationship with you, that he clings to Emily so much. That he feels he has to justify himself."

I'm about to tell Edward that this has nothing to do with anything, but I guess he hears me.

"No, it does, actually. Jacob once told Bella that he'd be the sun for her, and the air. That he wouldn't be an addiction…Bella felt she was addicted to me," he says it quietly. I wonder if he agrees that addiction is the best way to describe their relationship. Probably. "Leah, you are right that for Jacob, you are not an addiction. Nessie is an addiction for him, or something that goes beyond that, since she's his imprint. And this struggle with Sam, yes, that's an addiction. And just like with real addictions, both of those relationships or situations or whatever they are change Jacob, make him less himself."

I don't say anything. What is there to say? I've told Edward I won't stand in Jake's way. I can't keep him from—

"From his addictions? Yes, you can. For Jacob, you can be his medicine. The thing that keeps his addictions from ruining his life. Of course I still want him and Nessie to be around each other, eventually, once she's been in school. But they need…a filter."

_I thought you and Bella were each other's addictions and that you think it's a beautiful thing_, my thoughts mocks him. I put special loathing into the word "beautiful."

"Could you not be cynical for ten minutes? Yes, we are. And yes, it is. But Nessie isn't Bella or me. I was alone and miserable for decades. Bella and I were _destined_ for each other. Do you believe Jacob and Nessie were destined for each other?"

Goddamnit. A few months ago, I would have said no. Hadn't everyone asked me as much? Hadn't everyone _told _me as much? And now… I've seen the demons that being an Alpha plague Jacob with. And I've seen that Nessie is his cure, not me. So yes. I guess they are.

"No. They aren't. Your kind don't have destiny."

_What?_

"I don't think shapeshifters have destinies. I was talking about it with Alice. She can't see your kind, because your futures change so quickly. There's no preordainment—"

_But—_

"Yes, I know. She sees many versions of the future, many things that will never happen. But she can only see things that are possible, and as soon as certain decisions are made, she can't see certain things and can see others. Every detail of our lives isn't fixed, of course, but…we're more certain that you are. Alice can see nothing of you."

_That doesn't mean—_

"Maybe not. Just a theory. It's just what I think. I don't think you were destined to become a werewolf, or that Sam was destined to imprint on Emily."

_Of course we weren't. We only become wolves when _your kind_ are around_.

"Yes. That must be rather aggravating," Edward says, "I am sure that would give anyone an inferiority complex, knowing that they are only what they are because their enemy is near."

_I do not have an inferiority complex._

"No. But Sam does. A massive one. In any case, don't leave Jacob. It would be the stupidest thing you ever did, and would hurt the most. Yes, Leah, worse than loosing your father. Because that wasn't caused by your own action. That wasn't a choice. And yes, I know you think it was your fault, because you phased, but that's just you being…well, I'd say silly, but even I am not that harsh. Jacob will never let you just walk away from him. So what's your plan? To convince him you don't love him?"

I say nothing. He already knows, anyway. "Yeah, I thought so. Like what I did to Bella. Or, as my dear sister Rosalie pointed out, like in that dreadful film Moulin Rouge."

_Yes, well, I wasn't planning on following it up with a horrible little coughing death like Nicole Kidman._

He glares at me, with his too-dark eyes. "Alright. Make a joke. But I'm serious. You can't leave Jacob."

I sigh. Talking to Edward, it sounds simple. Easy. Sure. Be with Jacob. Keep him from falling in love with Nessie. _But I can't force him to stay on the Rez when he doesn't even want to be the Alpha of Sam's pack._

"As I said, he should get better after the fight. And you'll be there, his protection against that which haunts him. Or let him come with us, and you come, too. Before the Alpha fight."

_The fight is in a few days._

"Bella and I have already found a place to live. On the Oregon coast. We could all leave tomorrow, if you wanted."

_This is insane._

"No. Insane is turning your back on the man you love."

I'm about to say something, but Edward's face changes and he gets that look, the one that means he's hearing someone else coming toward us. In my human form, I can't tell who it is and I'm slightly annoyed. I only smell Rosalie a second before she appears through the bushes.

"Leah, don't leave Jacob," she says, pulling leaves from her perfect, blonde hair.

I make a barking noise and Edward says, "That's just what I've been telling her."

"Well, for once, Edward's right. You finally have a chance for happiness, for chrissakes don't throw it away. Honestly, after your little 'Oh, have Emmett help me keep Jacob from fighting Sam' thing, did you honestly think I wouldn't figure out what you were planning?"

_To be honest, no_. I think. Edward declines to pass that along. Smart boy.

And then she makes all the same arguments. I can't really argue without phasing, and I don't have clothes out here.

It wouldn't even be much of an argument, anyway. It's horrible, you know, when you're being told something you want to believe, told to do something that more than anything you want to do. When you've convinced yourself you can't have that thing you want, then being told you can… it's frustrating. You answer with all the anger of someone who has just finished convincing herself. Who isn't sure herself. I love him. I do. I love Jacob Black and I want to be with him.

* * *

Edward interrupts Rosalie. Holds up a hand to tell her to be quiet. "Leah, who is that?" he asks.

_What?_

"One of Sam's?" he says, meaning one of Sam's wolves. Shit. Another wolf. _Shit shit shit. _

But I can feel it now on the edge of my mind, now that I am looking. Which means it's not one of Sam's.

It's Quil. I can just barely hear him. And he can just barely hear me. Just me, not the Cullens.

_Quil! Come talk to me! _I shout, trying to use my influence as beta. It doesn't work. He was miles away to begin with, on the forest edge. And now he turns and bolts.

And before he goes, I get a flash of his thoughts.

* * *

Quil is in a very hard place. He loves Jacob like a brother and he wants him to be the La Push Alpha. But Claire is the goddess of all his idolatry. He cannot wrap his mind around why Jake would chose to betray Nessie (half-leech though she is) with me. And he agreed with the parts of my thoughts that he could hear. He does think Jake would be better off spending his life with his imprint. For Quil, the choice is between Jacob fulfilling his destiny as an Alpha and fulfilling his destiny at Nessie's side. It's a choice Quil doesn't think he could make. So he isn't going to—he's going to tell Jacob to make the choice. He thinks that if Jacob knew what I was thinking, it might change things for him. So Quil's going to tell him.

Quil is about to do my dirty work for me.

Fuck_. _

I run as fast as I can toward La Push.

* * *

Let me just say I am getting really fucking sick of the other wolves finding things out that they shouldn't. First it was Sam's nosy pack learning about me and Jake. Now it's Quil. I swear to god, I could just rip him limb from limb. _Run faster Leah_, I tell myself.

* * *

I don't bother to phase, I just run straight toward Jake's house. I am sure I am not the only wolf whose run across La Push in daylight (hell, we've probably even had real wolves…) And then a whole bunch of things happen at once. Or seem to, anyway.

I'm a few streets away from Jake's now. I haven't seen anyone—I guess everyone is at work or school. As I run like mad down the road, I hear voices. Angry, male voices. One of which belongs to my brother. I can see him up ahead, in human form. He's bleeding; his nose is broken. But the other kid looks worse. Wait, there's two of them. I'm nearing where they are standing and suddenly, I recognize them. Two young ones from Sam's pack. Oh my god. What the hell is Seth thinking, fighting them? Sam and Jake aren't even supposed to fight until Sunday—what's gotten into them all?

I run in front of my baby brother and snarl at the boys. One is definitely named Tom, the other might be Kevin or Tyler or one of the others, I don't know. The ones who phased when they were still children.

"Good thing your sister is here," says the one whose name I'm not sure of. His face is already swelling from where Seth must have punched him. I snarl. Damnit, Seth really owes me an explanation. And this fighting isn't like him. He's supposed to be the good one out of us.

And then Tom, who seems to be in the worst shape after the fight out of the three of them, is phasing, coming toward me. I leap aside in time and go for the neck, just missing it. Shit, he's bigger than I am, they all are. But he's young, and I'm so fucking high on adrenaline that he doesn't really have a chance. All of a sudden, I can hear Seth, so I know he and the other boy must have phased. Seth's the biggest out of us, and it doesn't take long until they are limping off. They move about 15 feet from us and just sort of stand there, bleeding and glaring.

_Shit, Dweeb, what the hell is going on? _I demand.

_Leah! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to!_

_Calm down! What happened?_

_I was walking home, and I passed them in the street, and, Leah, oh man, they were saying things about us, about our family, abut our Mom being a leechlover because she married Charlie, and also about how Charlie's not Quileute, and I really like Charlie and all, and I told them to shut up and then yeah…_

He sounds miserable. I can see the fight in his thoughts. They definitely provoked him. I'm a little surprised that it worked, though. Young boys, itching for a fight, who couldn't wait until Sam and Jake meet on Sunday. But Seth?

As I'm watching how this got started in his mind, he sees a bit of my panic.

_Why are you worried about Quil? _He asks.

_I think he's going to tell Jacob something I don't want him to_. I try to keep him from seeing more than that, but it doesn't work.

_Leah, Jacob loves you! _Seth is indignant. Angry, even.

So, still keeping my eyes on the two injured wolves across the road (safely in Sam's territory, but clearly in no mood to leave us Clearwaters unsupervised in case we run up behind them and eviscerate them for insulting our mother) I let him see everything.

_Oh. You aren't going to leave him then, _he says.

_I don't know what I'm doing. _But it's not true, not anymore. When Seth thought "You aren't going to leave him," I knew he was right. Rosalie was right. Even loveleech was right. I can't leave Jacob.

_Don't worry_, he says. _Even if Quil gets to Jacob, it doesn't matter. Jake's not going to believe him. _

Tom whimpers from his point across the street. He and the other one must be in a pretty intense mental conversation, too. Trying to decide if they can leave us? Waiting to heal? I really don't know.

Seth growls at the boys and they both look away. Well, at least we've all calmed down a bit. Honestly, though, boys and their testosterone. I growl, now. Because I want them to leave, damnit. And because basically, I'm not in a great mood. I just want to find Jacob.

And do what? Seth rolls his eyes at me, hearing my indecision. _Well, it's not my fault._ _I'm confused. I just really, really, _really_, don't want Quil to say anything to Jake. Whatever happens with me and him, the most important thing is for him to not fight Sam. _

_If you say so, _thinks Seth, _I mean, I used to think that, and then you and Mom and everyone else convinced me they had to fight or they'd go crazy. _

_Yeah, _I tell him, _but if Jake were to leave, _but he interrupts me.

_Jake's not a coward, Leah. And he isn't going to give you up. Look, I'll keep an eye on these two, you go run and find him or find Quil and bite him or something. _

I think to Seth that I'll do exactly that and start toward where I was headed before I found my brother in the fight. The problem is that Jake's house is just a few streets over, but I'm going to have to walk by Dumb and Dumber to get there. As I approach their side of the street (and keep in mind, I'm not running fast or anything, just walking slowly, so I don't panic anyone) they get up on all fours and growl at me. I ignore them. One, we already won, and two, they are just being stupid boys.

I give them wide berth as I go around them, and then I start running. God, I should really work out what I'm going to tell Jake. For all I know, he won't even be home. Maybe I should look for Quil first? No, that's stupid. Quil's an idiot.

Huh, I have a feeling that something is wrong—

And as I turn around to see, Tom comes flying at me. I turn just in time and his jaws miss my neck. But the element of surprise is still enough of an advantage. He missed my neck, but he still bit me, and now I'm bleeding. Shit. I growl and we circle each other.

_Leah! What the hell? Should I phase and explain to them that you're not trying to fight them, that you weren't like going for reinforcements or anything— _Seth's thoughts are wild, he's torn between fighting the other wolf at the end of the street or running up to me to help with Tom or else, apparently, phasing.

_I don't need you to save me, _I scold him, but I'm not doing as well in Round 2 as I was when I first attacked with Seth. Tom's attack has shaken me.

"STOP!" I hear someone bellow. Someone who has just arrived. Someone in human form, obviously. Someone who thinks he can order werewolves around.

Sam. He's got Paul with him, too.

I growl at Sam. I'm not thinking too clearly. I'm pissed at Tom, and the other one, for picking a fight with Seth and with me, for attacking me out of the blue, and at Quil, for messing around in something that's not his business, and Sam again, for being Sam, for making Jake have to fight him, for being the source of all my problems… and I'm pissed at me, for not knowing what the hell I'm doing, what to do about Jake, how to stop him fighting, whether or not to send him away with Nessie….

Basically not in a very good mood.

"Leah? Is that you?" Sam asks, still trying to use his Alpha voice. As if he has any control over me. "Tom, stop it!"

And Tom stops.

Damnit, since when do I need _Sam _to protect me? I growl again and Tom growls again at me in turn.

"Tom, control yourself," says Sam. "She's trying to get to Jake's house."

How does he know that?

"And what the hell do you think you're all doing fighting in the middle of the Rez? Anyone could see you! Go to the forest and phase. I want to talk to you two, Tom and Kevin," Sam continues.

Ha, so the arrogant jackass realizes he can't give orders to me. Still, it looks like Seth is running off to phase, too. I start back down to the street toward where the Blacks live.

"I told you it wouldn't work out," I hear Paul say to Sam. "Leah's too much of a bitch for her own good. Still, Rachel says Jake's not taking it very well." Oh god, that's not good. Quil must have told Jake and Rachel must have overheard….

"What I don't understand is what the hell she thinks she's doing fighting my youngest pack members in the middle of the Rez in broad daylight? And as for the Jacob thing, well, at least she finally realized that Jake would never choose her over that halfbreed."

And I don't know why that's what makes me snap. Maybe it's _Paul_ gossiping about me and Jake. Maybe it's Sam, acting like me being attacked by his ridiculous teenage packmembers is somehow my fault. Maybe it's Sam being so certain about my relationship. Maybe it's because I'm angry to begin with and because I'm confused about what to do.

But I stop in my tracks and give Sam my most threatening growl.

"Go run along now, little girl," says Paul. Have I mentioned that Paul's kind of an asshole?

Sam gives me a strange look. "Leah," he says. "I know it can't be easy for you, but I'm glad you're finally taking my advice. You know I've only ever wanted what's best for you."

And then he smiles at me.

Oh, hell no. That _bastard. _That smug, arrogant, obnoxious, _bastard_.

And this time, I'm in such a mood that I don't stop myself from going for his throat.

Before I've halved the distance between us, he's phased, his clothes falling around him in tatters. Paul goes, too. And somewhere near the forest, I sense my brother turning and running as fast as he can back toward me.

_Leah, shit, I will be there as soon as I can, just have to deal with these two_, he says, about Tom and Kevin.

Paul lunges for me but Sam growls at him. Still, I dodge, and snap at Sam.

He's much, much bigger than I am.

Sam gestures with his head down the street, where the forest is. I guess that's wolf for "Let's take this outside." But I'm not paying much attention. I sort of just want to rip someone apart, and I don't much care who it is. Someone ought to teach Sam to stay the hell out of my business. Every time I make a lunge for Sam, he manages to dodge. Paul's just standing there, glaring at me. I guess Sam must have told him not to attack me.

That just makes me more angry, actually. I'm so fucking tired of Sam looking after me!

And then, in Seth's thoughts, I see Jake. In wolf form. Pick up Tom with his teeth and throw him a good ten feet and then swipe at Kevin. Quil's there too, and between Quil and Seth, Kevin's down.

I see Jake running between the houses between the forest and where I am trying to get at Sam. When he's about 15 feet way, Sam's head snaps up and glares at him. I take advantage of the distraction on go for Sam's neck. _JAKE! Go away! You cannot fight Sam!_ I shout at him.

_Leah, shut up, _his thoughts bellow as he closes on us. But I guess Sam's "sit, dog!" command doesn't apply to Paul fighting Jake, because Paul's there, between me and Sam and where Jake is coming toward us. Sam meanwhile shakes me off and catches some of my fur between his jaws. The last thing I see before he flips me is Paul attacking at Jake.

The next thing I know I'm on my side and Sam is standing over me, growling at me. I jump back up and start circling him.

_Leah, go home_, Jake says. He's fighting Paul, which is much better than him fighting Sam.

_You can't fight Sam. Jake, you don't want this. _

_Do NOT try to tell me what I want, Leah Clearwater_, he says. Then Seth and Quil are there, and they're attacking Paul together.

Which leaves Sam and Jake free.

* * *

A/N:

Parts of this chapter (and this fic?) were inspired by a Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds lyric from the song "Do You Love Me?"

_In my bed she cast the blizzard out_

_And a mock sun blazed upon her head_

In other news, my restless mind is contemplating a third or else another fic about Jacob and Leah… possibly an AU…or else a fanfic about any one of the other characters aside from Bella or Edward (That's Stephanie Meyer's job!) Yes, I know that's very broad, but if you've read my Twilight humor one-shot "The Price is Right" you will know I can be a little strange in what I want to write about….

Anyway, I thought I'd mention it now, even though there's still plenty more of Red Sky at Morning to go!

As always, please review! And I will try to be good and actually get the next chapter up sooner than I have been doing!


	9. Chapter 9

Author's Note: Thank you again to everyone who has been reviewing, adding this fic as a favorite, and putting it on C2s!

This is NOT the last chapter! I repeat, NOT the last chapter! Enjoy!

UPDATE (a few hours after originally published): It's a good thing this story is nearly over, because I am losing my mind. Firstly, hasa VERY kindly pointed out to me that I made a pretty big, really stupid cannon error here. So it's fixed now, and fortunately, still makes sense. Thank you! If you'd left your email address, I would send you a GIANT thanks, but instead it's here! Secondly, rosegilmore drew my attention to another error. Thank you!

* * *

This is bad. Jake and Sam circle each other. We're all in the middle of the road, and more are showing up from Sam's pack. Some phase, others stay human. I can hear the ones in human form muttering about how we should get out of the part of the Rez where we could be seen.

But every second I spend in wolf form, I lose more of my humanity. I'm being swallowed up by my instincts. I just want to see Jacob defeat Sam.

Both wolves are bleeding a bit from fighting each other's packs. I hope Sam's more hurt than Jake—I did manage to get my teeth in pretty deeply. I have bits of his fur between my teeth.

Damnit, they're still just circling and growling. Wait, isn't that what I want, don't I want Sam and Jake _not_ to fight? Jake needs to…needs to….

Why the hell would I _not _want Sam's to get his assed kicked?

On the edge of my thoughts I can hear what the others in my pack are thinking. Jake's just a wash of anger. Nothing coherent coming from there. Seth's asking _Hey, Jake? You alirght? Jake? _And Quil growls at him. _Leave him alone, Seth. He's got a lot on his mind. _

I can see Embry, standing off the road. He's still human. Looks concerned. I wonder why he hasn't phased, why he's not fighting.

Jacob and Sam are still just circling and growling. The taste of Sam's fur, Sam's blood, is too much. If they aren't going to fight, if Jake and Sam are just going to stand there, then _I'll _do it.

I leap forward toward Sam. At exactly the same second—something about a Pack Mind?—Quil charges into one of Sam's wolves and Seth into another. I aim for Sam's flank and I'm centimeters away from sinking my teeth in when something knocks me out of the way. It's Paul. His teeth catch my left flank but I don't feel the pain through the adrenaline.

Jake's rage in my mind is taking shape. More focused. Instead of just anger, Quil, Seth and I can hear some semblance of thoughts. At the same instant the three of us charged Sam's pack, Jake went for Sam. _Fight_. That's Jake. It's not a command to us. He isn't thinking about us. All he can see, all he can think about, is Sam.

Paul drags me a few feet but I wrench myself away from him and turn to face him. Some part of me thinks I should be fighting Jared, he's Sam's beta, but Jared isn't here, and if he is, he's not right in front of me. And Paul is _such_ a jackass.

I'm fast, and I use that to my advantage. I run left and Paul swings his head around to follow me. I dart right and get his side. He wasn't expecting it and I draw blood. He throws his body to one side and I go flying, but I take a bit of Paul with me. I land on my back and jump up. All around me I can see wolves tearing into wolves. Sam and Jake are in the middle, and the human part of me wants to see, is worried about Jake, wants him to win…but the wolf in me just wants to fight.

I could get a better running start if my claws could grip the ground but we're on pavement. There are men here, boys I recognize as other wolves. They haven't phased yet. Why not? Don't they want to fight? But inch by inch, they are moving us toward the forest and the beach. I'm too busy fighting Paul though, to pay attention. The next thing I'm aware of, I'm on the beach, between massive driftwood logs, entire trees washed up on the shore. The forest is so close, and from where we are now, I can't see houses anymore. One part of me thinks "good, no danger of us being seen," but that voice is small…now that we're away from the houses, roads and cars, the human side of me is quieting down. God, it feels good to fight. And why not? Sam's pack are the _enemy_.

I leap to the other side of a log and fall between the cracks of the roots and branches, all one mess of bleached wood. Paul follows me, and I jump out at him and catch his side. Teeth and claws find their mark, and Paul makes a whimpering noise. Good, he felt that one. I pull back and go in again, but this time he manages to dodge in time.

The thoughts of my packbrothers are a din in my mind, but we're all thinking the same thing anyway. _Fight_.

Paul's good, but not that good. Probably overconfident, fighting a girl and all. But he's loosing more blood than I am. It's slowing him down, making him stumble. I'll have him soon. Jake and Sam have broken away from the fray and are heading toward the forest. Or Jake is, and Sam's following him. Wait, what? No, it should be the other way around.

Through our thoughts, I can hear Jacob, now that I'm focusing._ Hurts. _The only word to come in clearly, the rest is just him wishing for more fighting. Sam must have gotten him pretty bad.

_Jake_, I think. There was something I wanted to tell him, something important, but now, with the fighting, I can't seem to remember. _Kill him_, I say. I am sure that was it, that was what I had to tell him. At least I think I'm thinking that. Maybe the thoughts are coming from Quil, or Embry, or Seth. I can't tell, anymore. More than ever, we seem to all be one.

Paul lunges toward me, but I dart away. He lands half on a piece of driftwood and slips. I go for his throat and don't let go. And then he's down.

He isn't moving, but I can tell he's still alive. I bite his shoulder again for good measure and then look around for my next opponent. No sense killing him—he's a wolf, not a bloodsucker, the natural enemy of my people. I leave him lying on the beach, bleeding into the water.

More and more of the fight has moved into the forest, where there's room to run. There's more of them, sure, but we're better fighters. Sam's pack is full of children who've never fought before.

I'm chasing another wolf now, and he's leading me into the forest. I don't know who it is, and I don't care. I'll do to him what I did to Paul.

Blood, fur, teeth, flesh, and more blood. It's all I can think. I wish the scrapes Paul gave me would hurry up and heal. This new wolf, he must be one of the young ones. He's leaving himself way too open, making too many stupid mistakes.

I smell something. I stop ripping fur out of the other wolf and smell the air. It smells disgusting.

Vampires.

On our land.

There's flashes of white all around and I see them, standing there, glinting. "Leah, is that you?" one of them says. Small. Female. Some part of me thinks, _Alice. Friend_. I don't attack, but the wolf I was fighting does. She's too fast for him, though.

"It'd be nice if you'd call your playmates off," she says.

"Alice, it's not going to work. They're minds are barely human right now," says another one.

_Edward_, I realize. I know these vampires. And hearing speech is making me remember myself a bit more. They're talking about Sam and Jake…._Sam and Jake. Sam's winning? Jake is hurt_.

"Let's go, it is imperative that we find Sam immediately, and Leah's too far gone to know where he is," the male vampire whose name is Edward says.

But I'm not that far gone. I just don't know where they are. _Forest. _I think, and another part of me thinks _vampires, enemy_. It's not me though, it's Quil. He must be three miles away, but there are more leeches there. Seth and Embry can both smell them, too.

I send out my thoughts, trying to find Jake. Instead, I feel a deep, sharp pain in my shoulder. Is it Jake's? Am I feeling where Sam has wounded him? No. It's my shoulder. The wolf I have been fighting has torn into me.

Jesus it hurts. I turn to face him and stumble a bit. I growl, but before I can attack, a second wolf is on me, this time on my left flank. Where Paul already got me. Shit.

I'm not exactly in peak fighting condition right now, so I go for Option B: run like hell. Or limp like hell, I guess, but I still manage to get a head start on them. I do my best to race through the forest, which mostly consists of me trying not to trip. I'm not even sure if the other wolves are chasing me.

Damnit, where are the others in my pack? I try to see their thoughts, but all I get are blurs. Everyone's fighting. Everyone's bleeding. And nothing from Jacob except a red haze of rage at Sam.

I do what an actual wolf would do, and smell the air. Listen a bit. Then move toward where the most action seems to be going on. Not that I'm really in any condition to fight, but I _need_ to see Jake.

And then, suddenly, I do see him. Him and Sam It's worse than it was during their first fight. Beyond worse. Jacob is covered in blood. His own, and Sam's. It's even caked into his fur on his right side. Blood is oozing out of his shoulder, where Sam must have dug his teeth in. And there's claw marks down his chest. Sam must have pinned him. I'm glad I didn't see it.

But Sam doesn't look any better. He might even look worse, but maybe that's just because I want him to. He can't stand up straight and one eye seems to be swollen shut. Good, Jake!

And then I see the leeches. There's lots of them here. Watching. What the hell are they doing here? This means they've broken the treaty.

None of the other wolves seems to be fighting. Some of Sam's pack and even Quil, Seth and Embry, seem to have formed a circle around the Alphas. My pack brothers look pretty bad.

_You should see the other guys_ Embry thinks. It's the first clear thought I've been able to hear.

Sam and Jake are circling each other. There's a noise, though. Some kind of weird background noise.

Oh. It's the leeches talking.

"…we have to make them stop…"

"…they won't listen to us…."

"…she could die, and he'd never forgive himself…"

I hear the words, but the human part of me is so small right now that they don't register. Listening to my packmates talk about fighting is one thing, but trying to focus on what the damn leeches are saying…

At least I am not growling at them. Some of Sam's younger minions look as if they're about to pounce.

"Ugh, this is ridiculous!" one of the leeches says, and rushes forward in a blur. Suddenly, he's standing between Jacob and Sam, facing Sam. Emmett, that's his name. "Sam, listen to me. You have to stop this! Em—"

Jake and Sam are no more likely to listen than I am. And then Emmett is on the ground, and Jacob and Sam have charged each other, and are fighting a few feet from where Emmett's lying, two twin gashes running up his chest and back, one from Sam, one from Jake.

Sam jumps and tries to land on Jake, but Jake moves to Sam's left, the side with Sam's injured eye. Sam moves his head to try to see Jake, but Jake's already found Sam's neck. He doesn't let go.

And then, just like that, he throws Sam a few feet. Which is pretty impressive, considering Sam's the size of a horse.

Judging from the amount of destruction in this part of the forest, I'd say this isn't the first time one of them has used this particular move.

But this time Sam doesn't get up. He's bleeding pretty freely from his neck. Jake walks over to him and sniffs him. Sam still isn't moving, so Jake grabs some of his fur with his teeth and shakes him a bit. Sam's head lolls to one side.

_Shit, man, is he—? _I think that's Quil.

_No_. Jacob. The first truly coherent thought I've heard from him. He's standing over Sam's body, but at my excitement hearing something from him, he straightens his head up and looks at me.

_Jake_—I think, and take a few steps toward him, even though it hurts to put any weight on at least two of my legs. I shake my head as if that will clear it. I feel like I'm waking up from some really bad Nyquil-induced dream or something…my humanity is returning, but not very quickly. The adrenaline is wearing off and I start to realize just how much pain I am in. Jake is still watching me with glassy eyes.

_Don't_. He sounds broken.

_Jake, I— _I'm remembering earlier. What happened. What I was going to say to him.

_Leave him alone_. Quil thinks, sounding exhausted. _He almost _died_. You can worry about your relationship drama later._

_Jacob, goddamnit, I love you!_ I don't realize the thought is coming until it's too late. The others have heard it, but oh well. I guess packs don't have secrets.

_Leah_. Not_ Leah,_ and then something else. Not the start of a sentence. Just my name and a period. A full sentence.

And there's more in that word than in all of the sentences and paragraphs and entire books of words of love that Sam used to tell me.

There is a very loud crash as Jacob Black, the only Alpha of La Push, succumbs to blood loss and falls to the forest floor.

"Is it over?" I hear one of the leeches, no, Jasper, ask.

Rosalie makes some inarticulate sound as she runs to where Emmett is. I look at him seriously for the first time. He doesn't exactly look good. There's no blood, of course, since he's not human. Then again, if he were human, he'd probably be dead. I move toward where she's cradling him, which is very close to where Sam and Jake have collapsed.

"Did Jacob win?" Alice asks. I can tell that having Rosalie, and even the unconscious and badly damaged Emmett so close to Sam and Jake is making all the wolves uncomfortable. One of Sam's starts to growl at Rosalie. She ignores him.

"Come on, let's get everyone back," says Edward, moving toward where Jake and Sam are.

_Don't think that's such a good idea, _I think at Edward. He looks at me, and even though I can't hear what he's thinking, there are lines etched in his face. He does not look happy.

That's the last thing I can remember thinking.

* * *

The next time I'm awake, I'm moving more quickly than even I can run. I'm being carried.

"Emugf," I say, coughing. Oh. I'm human.

"You lost a lot of blood," says Rosalie. Rosalie is carrying me.

"…'mit?" I ask, remembering that my boyfriend nearly ripped her husband open. It's the closest I can come to saying "Emmett."

"He'll be fine. Just a scratch," she says.

"….'m naked," the thought just occurred to me.

"You phased while you were unconscious. I thought you'd prefer me taking you back to me leaving you lying around naked in the forest. Also, you're easier to carry in human form." Later, when I am able to think again, when I am not so preoccupied with number of broken bones I have, I will realize that it's a funny thing, to be carried at breakneck speed by your friend who is _shorter than you are_. I will amuse myself by imagining Alice carrying Jake around. But right now, all I say is,

"….Jake?"

"Don't worry, they'll get him back, and Sam, too.

"…hmm?" which is injured-Leah-ese for "home?"

"Sam's. Carlisle is there, he'll set everyone's bones."

"…bad…."

"If you mean the pain, I'm sorry, but I am sure we can find you some drugs soon. If you mean us all being on the Reservation, then, yes, it is bad, but I'll explain later." She says something else, but I can't focus on her words anymore.

* * *

The sun is over me like a giant glowing ball burning my eyes. Not the sun. A light. A tacky overhead light. Huh. I _hurt_. I can't move.

I'm on the floor. Thin carpet. I look down at myself. First of all, now I'm dressed, in a shirt that vaguely looks familiar. There are bright red marks on my chest. I try to turn my head to see my shoulders but I can't. I tell myself I'm a wolf, I'll heal as good as new, but it is….disconcerting, seeing how torn up I am. Some of my ribs feel broken. That must be from Paul. One of my hips hurts like a bitch.

I smirk, thinking about how much damage I, the smallest wolf in La Push, did to Sam's boys.

"I think Leah's awake," someone says. My eyes are open, but whoever is talking appears backlit, just a brownish shape above me.

"Why?" someone else asks. The voices are too smooth, they must be Cullens.

"Well, her eyes are open, and she's smirking." The first shape says, moving closer to me. I can see her now. It's Alice.

"You alright, Lady Wolf?" says the second one, who I now realize is Jasper.

I make a sort of "euh" noise and then Alice is kneeling beside me, holding a cup with a bendy straw in it.

"Here, drink this."

Frankly, I'd rather be injected with morphine at this point, but I try to swallow a bit of water. It does help, a bit.

"Carlisle hasn't had a chance to set your bones yet," Jasper is saying. "I am sure he'll be down as soon as he can…. Try not to move in the meantime."

My eyes are starting to focus now and I can look around a bit more. I know where I am, finally. Sam and Emily's living room. And every available space is taken up by various members of the La Push packs. On my left is Seth, who is still unconscious. I can see a few scrapes still glowing red.

Alice sees me looking and says, "Your brother is alright, don't worry. None of his injuries are as serious as yours. And he ran here mostly on his own."

I look to my right and see Emmett, also unconscious. They've taken off the remains of his shirt but he seems to have some kind of pad under his back. Rosalie is sitting next to him, petting his hair.

I see Edward, out of the corner of my eye, and he seems to be doing the same thing that Jasper and Alice are doing, nursing injured werewolves. I almost want to laugh.

Finally, I look across Emmett, toward the kitchen. There, sprawled across the kitchen counter, is Jacob. All 6'7 of him. He's sort of hanging off the counter, actually. Wearing what are most likely some of Sam's cut-offs. The marks in his skin look _deep_. At least he seems to be breathing normally.

Nessie is standing next to the counter, washing his injuries.

"He'll be fine, too," Alice says, "He lost way too much blood, though. Carlisle is considering giving him and Sam transfusions."

"….stash?" I ask. Jasper laughs darkly and Alice joins in with a giggle.

"How many times have I told you, we don't get our dinners from the blood bank," says Jasper. "It's too easy. No one likes freezer food."

Alice smacks her husband on the arm and he gives her a wicked grin.

"If you're curious, Sam's in the bedroom, with Emily. And Bella and Esme and Carlisle and your mom. Carlisle's going to treat him as soon as he's done with Emily, since he's probably in the worst shape out of any of you," Jasper says to me.

My mom is here? The look of confusion must somehow register on my face, because I get an explanation quickly enough.

"Jazz, I didn't tell her," Rosalie says, from where she's sitting with Emmett. "Leah, the reason we were all in the forest today, trying to keep Jake and Sam from literally killing each other, the reason we're here now, playing nurses to a bunch of testosterone-over-dosed wolves, well, not _you_, obviously, but the rest of your kind… it's because Emily went in to labor today."

"She nearly lost the baby," Alice says quietly.

"Early," I say. Emily wasn't due for another month, at least. Was she?

"Babies, I should say," Alice is saying.

"Twins often come early," Jasper says, sitting next to Alice and looking down at me.

"…Emily almost died today, and the babies with her," says Rosalie. "Her water broke when she was at home, and she was able to call Carlisle."

"Your mom must have given her his number," Alice says.

"He _ran_ over," Jasper says, emphasizing the severity of the situation. Driving would have been too slow. "He had to do an emergency cesarean. It would have been easier in a hospital, but he couldn't risk moving her. He wasn't sure if she'd pull through."

Rosalie says, "That's why we were in the forest today. Carlisle asked us to get Sam home."

"Esme and Bella are with Emily, helping Carlisle. They're the only two of us that know anything about giving birth," says Alice. Rosalie keeps her gazed fixed on Emmett but then she makes quick eye-contact with me and flashes a smile that's more of a grimace. I am not sure if Alice or Jasper notices. "I couldn't _see_, Leah. I tried, and even though Emily's not a wolf, she's too wrapped up with wolves for me to be able to see anything. We didn't know if she'd make it or not…"

"Carlisle called your mom and Charlie," continues Jasper. Your mom sort of retro-actively gave us permission to be on your land. We're still trying to get ahold of Jake's dad and whoever the other top Elders are…."

"Quil," I say slowly.

"Yeah, right," Jasper says. I have another sip of the water that Alice is holding and close my eyes. This news about Emily is a lot to digest.

Twins. Wow. I wonder how Sam's going to take it when he finds out that a filthy bloodsucking leech doctor saved his wife and children.

"They….alright?" I ask. The water is making it a bit easier to speak

It's Jasper who answers. "The twins? Yeah. The cesarean was right as the fight started, nearly five hours ago. Carlisle thinks they'll live. Esme drove over with all the life-support stuff we had around when Bella had Nessie. They're doesn't seem to be anything wrong with them, either, they just came too soon."

"They're both boys," says Rosalie.

I suddenly realize why I recognize the shirt they've dressed me in. It's one of Emily's. It's the one she was wearing the first time I saw her with Sam.

I smile, and I think the leeches assume it's because of the news about Emily's babies. I will have to tell Roaslie about it later—she'd appreciate it.

Jesus. Emily had twins.

* * *

The next time I wake up, someone has set my bones. The wounds on my chest are healing. Seth is no longer beside me, in fact, I don't see him anywhere at all. About half of the wolves seem to be gone. Paul, I am pleased to see, is lying in the dining room. I can just see his head through the doorway. He looks like he's still unconscious. I wonder if he walked here himself or if someone had to go to the beach to retrieve him. Jacob is still on Sam's counter, but his wounds are bandaged, now.

Nessie is sitting by the counter on a barstool.

Emmett is sitting up, now. His back is facing me and I get a nice up-close view of the damage Jacob did to him. Parallel gashes, running from his left hip to his right shoulder. Not perfectly straight, but jagged, and thicker near the shoulder, where Jake's claws must have gone in. I remember from earlier that his chest, where Sam got him, doesn't look any better. I wonder briefly why he hasn't started to heal, and then I remember. Werewolves are one of the only things that can hurt vampires. Emmett's going to be wearing those scars for the rest of his un-life.

He's talking to someone. Oh, I'll be damned. Quil Atera Sr. is sitting in an arm chair. And even more surprisingly, between where Quil is and the counter, is Billy, sitting in his wheelchair. He keeps looking from Jake to Emmett and back. Probably trying to decide which is more disturbing, seeing his son nursed by a half-leech or seeing a full leech sprawled on Sam's floor, chatting away.

Quil, too, looks sort of pained.

None of them has really noticed that I'm awake yet, so I just close my eyes and listen.

"This must be so weird for you," says Emmett, in his typical happy-go-lucky manner. "I mean, coming back and finding us all here!"

There's a very long pause and then Quil says, "Yes."

"Seriously, though, that was an awesome fight today!"

"The fight between two Alphas is a sacred—" Quil starts to say, but Emmett cuts him off. No one from La Push would dare cut Quil Sr. off. Nor would anyone ever contradict him and point out that there's never _been _an Alpha-vs.-Alpha fight until now, so how could it be sacred?

"Yeah, but it was insanely awesome. There was this part where Jake literally threw Sam! Into a tree! And considering how _big_ they both are…"

This time it's Billy who interrupts Emmett. "You should not have seen it."

"Yeah. I guess it would have saved me getting attacked by your son," Emmett says, still sounding happy, apparently unaware that Quil and Billy are probably fantasizing about permanently removing him from the Rez and probably the world.

"Only an utter fool would put himself in the path of two wolves fighting," says Quil.

"Now you sound like my wife," Emmett says, laughing. "I wasn't exactly expecting _Jake _of all people to attack me! Maybe if Edward had gone in, then yeah, I can see Jake going for him…"

"If Edward had been in your place, those gashes would be much deeper," Billy mutters in an undertone.

Emmett hears him and laughs.

No one says anything for a few moments, so I sneak a peak. I can see Quil's looking at Emmett with his eyebrow raised. Finally he says, "You laugh about the idea of your covenmate being killed?"

"Well, it's not that I'd want anything to happen to Edward, ever, because he actually is a pretty great guy, but it _is_ kind of funny…." There is another pause and then he adds, "Sorry about the whole breaking-the-treaty thing." So maybe he's figured out they don't actually want to talk to him.

"We couldn't have just let Emily and the babies _die_," says a new voice. It's Nessie. She must have been eavesdropping like me. Her voice has those pitches to it that she gets when she's being serious, making her sound mature enough to be a woman of fifty. I am sure it takes Quil and Billy by surprise

And then Quil says, "Sam was a fool for not letting her have medical care. I told him that my mother always told me that she had a difficult time carrying me. When I was born, she had half the women in the tribe tending her. Although things were different then; more people knew."

"Why didn't she call an ambulance?" asks Billy.

"She was scared someone would find out the secret," Nessie says, sounding very adult, not to mention well-informed. "Or at least that's what she told us when we got here. Mom made me stay and help Grandma and Grandpa tend her. She wouldn't let me go into the forest."

"Yeah, and it's a good thing," says Emmett, and I can tell from his voice that he's smiling.

"Will Jake be alright? Will he wake up soon?" Nessie asks. Billy makes a grunting noise that probably means both "Yes," and "I don't want to talk to you."

"Jake is a good man," Nessie says, and I assume she's talking to Billy. "He's been a very good older brother to me. But I don't want you to think I am trying to steal him away. I was just a fetus when the imprinting occurred. And anyway, I want him to marry Aunt Leah."

I risk opening my eyes a fraction of an inch, just to see the look on Quil and Billy's faces. I bet they didn't know that other people were planning the wedding, too.

"Although I think your family get-togethers are going to be very horrible," she says.

"Why is that?" it's Emmett who asks. Quil and Billy probably haven't remembered how to speak yet.

"Well, Dad said that Aunt Leah nearly killed Paul today, and isn't Paul the one who's going to marry one of Jake's sisters?"

"…Leah fought Paul?" Billy asks.

"That's what we were told," says Nessie.

There's a pause, and then Billy says, "…well, Rachel won't like it, but it's going to make Jacob very happy."

Quil sighs heavily. "You know, he very probably provoked her."

"Paul does tend to say whatever pops into his mind," agrees Billy.

"Well, there's that. And our young Miss Clearwater doesn't exactly take much winding up."

Gee, thanks Quil. Useless old man.

"It's one of the ways you can tell she has the Alpha-gene," he finishes. Oh, alright then.

"I know I wouldn't cross her," says Emmett.

There's another pause, and then Quil says, quietly, "My father and Levi and Ephraim are going to roll over in their graves at this, but I think, in today's circumstances, Dr Cullen did well to break to the treaty."

Another pause, and then Billy adds, "and I'd rather see you cluttering up Sam's floor than mine." His tone changes, and he says to Emmett, "if anyone asks about your scars, you had better use Emily's cover story and tell them you were mauled by a bear. You have to keep our secret, like we've been keeping yours."

Only Nessie and I can appreciate the glee in Emmett's voice. "Really? Do these look like bear marks? This is actually _the best day ever!_"

Quil and Billy must be looking confused, because Nessie says, "Uncle Emmett was mauled by a bear but when he became a vampire, his scars were healed. Uncle Jasper always teases him and says that the bear was a figment of his imagination."

"You were mauled by a bear?" asks Quil.

"Yes. In the 1930s."

"And you survived?"

"Yes. No. Not really. That's how I met my wife. She found me and had me made into a vampire so I wouldn't die."

"Who is your wife?" It's Billy who asks, and I am surprised that he can bring himself to speak to a leech.

"Rosalie. The blonde one."

"And then you met the Cullens?" asks Quil.

"No, she was already one of the Cullens. I've been a Cullen since Rosalie and Carlisle saved me and made me into a vampire."

"Huh," is all Quil says. I am not sure if Emmett understands why they asked him those questions, but I think it has to do with our status as "Protectors." We protect humans from the big bad vampires. But here's Dr Cullen saving lives right and left.

I wonder what Quil and Billy must think of Emmett. That he's incredibly brave? Or a silly young man who dives out in front of dangerous animals on a regular basis?

* * *

I sleep, again. I know from experience that it's going to take at least a couple days to heal completely. Or at least that's what it took after a vampire fight. This time, when I wake up, I'm not in the make-shift hospital that Sam's house was turned into. I'm lying in bed. I think for an instant that someone must have taken me home, but my bed isn't this soft.

I'm at the Cullens'. And sure enough, Alice is here.

"Don't you people have anything better to do than…?" I start

"…tend injured shapeshifters? Apparently not. You're talking in sentences though, that's good improvement."

She offers me the water and I try to sit up. The room spins a bit.

"If it makes you feel any better," she adds, "You had some of the worst injuries."

"Surprisingly enough, that doesn't help."

"Well, Paul was in worse shape than you, obviously. And Jake and Sam. I guess everyone else was too wrapped up in watching to actually fight much once things really got started."

"So basically, Quil and Embry are useless."

"Quil and Embry both had broken bones. Just not as many as you."

"Humf."

"Aren't you going to ask about Jake?" she says gently. I try to keep my face from showing any reaction whatsoever. She sighs and continues, "He's fine. Actually, he seems to be recovering much more quickly than you are. He woke up this morning and Seth and Nessie filled him in on everything that's happened…with Emily, I mean."

"Oh."

"He doesn't remember attacking Emmett."

"Not surprising. You sort of…. Lose yourself."

"I guess my brother was right, all those times he warned Bella about how dangerous your kind are," she says, smiling. By now she's settled herself on the foot of the bed, and I've managed to sit up. It's a pretty big bed. I remember this room, actually. I once kissed Jacob here, a long time ago, before he ran off to Canada. I very nearly did more than just kiss him...

"Yeah, because you vampires are completely un-dangerous and never lose control of yourselves," I tell her.

"Fair enough. Hearing you and Jake talk about what it's like fighting, it….reminds me of things Jasper's told me. About how it was for him before he met me."

She's staring at the bedspread. I just nod.

"He respects you a lot, you know," she says in a different tone.

"Hm?"

"My husband. He respects you. He doesn't respect most people. Wait, that sounds wrong, and I'm not trying to make him sound horrible. What I mean is that… Well, take Bella for example. He likes Bella a lot, because Edward loves her and she makes Edward happy, and because she and I are such good friends. But he actually respects you as a person."

"Oh," I say, because I don't know what else to say. On the one hand, I've always found Jasper hilarious. I appreciate people with dark senses of humor, like Jasper or Rosalie. People who have a reason to laugh about horrible things. I know my own sense of humor got a lot darker after the whole dad-dying, phasing, Sam-leaving-me-for-my-damn-cousin thing.

"You know, I always knew I'd meet the Cullens, and I always knew I'd be with Jasper. I knew that nothing he'd ever done would bother me because my destiny was with him. For Jasper, I was the first person who didn't want anything from him, who wasn't trying to manipulate him. Anyway, at some point, I think you just have to love someone, and work at making things work, if that makes sense. And not worry about what they've done in the past—"

"Or if they've imprinted on the daughter of the woman they used to love?" I interrupt.

"Was I being that transparent?" she asks sheepishly.

"No, not really. Consider it a lucky guess."

"He asked about you. When he woke up."

"Oh?"

"Way to play it cool, Leah," she teases. Damn leeches know me too well.

"Fine. Alright. What did he say?"

"He said, 'Where's Leah?'"

"Oh."

"Come on, don't you want to know if he said anything else?"

"Well, did he?"

"…not really. He did ask if you were alright."

"What did you tell him?"

"That you had three broken ribs and that Paul did a number on your hip but that you were healing. Then he said he'd kill Paul and we said you nearly did."

"Oh."

"And he laughed."

"Paul and Jake get on each other's nerves a lot."

"Isn't Paul going to marry one of Jake's sisters?"

"Yeah."

"How has your Tribe survived so long, with all of the drama?" she asks.

I consider muttering something about white settlers being slightly worse for our tribe than the drama, thank you very much, but instead I tell her, "It's just especially bad right now. Our last Pack had three wolves. Now there's like seventeen of us. It's a lot easier to have minimal imprinting drama when you only have three wolves."

"Can I say something else about you and Jake?"

"Whose lives did you mess around in before me and Jake and Bella and Edward?"

"The '60s, '70s, '80s and '90s were pretty horrible and I'd rather not talk about them, thanks. We played a lot of board games. Anyway. You know that necklace Jazz and I gave you? The one with the quotation on it that he likes for you?"

I nod. Of course I know the one she means. It's a little silver circle, kind of looks like a really classy dogtag. Not the military kind, but the kind you stamp "Rover: 555-5555" on. They actually got one just like it for Scott. (And when I phase while wearing it, that's exactly what it looks like. A collar for a wolf). Engraved on mine is a quotation from some crazy dancer that says, "You were wild here once, don't let them tame you." I wear it almost every day.

"I never really asked him what it meant. Jazz can be kind of funny about things. When he gets an opinion about someone, it's very hard to change his mind. I just assumed it was about Sam. You know, sort of like, "don't let Sam crush your spirit." But I've been thinking about it more, as Bella and Edward have been making plans to move, and I think it's about all of us. About not letting _anyone _tame you. Sam, or the Packs, or anyone at La Push, but also us, or, or even, I think, Jake. Anyway, that's what I think. That it's about not letting anyone tell you what you have to be."

"I can see that," I say slowly. I never really thought that much about it. It just… seemed to fit, in some way.

"Not that Jasper would ever say something that eloquent if you asked him what it meant."

I giggle. Jasper's not really the type to explain himself.

"Oh, but… also, don't you think…that it's sort of meant to be ironic?"

"Because it's a wolf-sized dog-collar that says 'don't let anyone tame you?'"

"Yes. I think it means, 'don't let anyone tame you, _unless you want them to_."

"Or he's just mocking me for being a wolf."

"I tamed Jasper, you know. I mean, when he met me, he…"

"Stopped eating humans?"

"…yeah. Anyway, Leah, the term is 'drinking from.'"

"Ah, thanks. I'd hate to embarrass myself with improper vampire feeding terminology. What _would _people think?"

"And Emmett tamed Rose."

"And now Rosalie can repay the favor by getting Emmett an instructional DVD about how to _not_ run in front of dangerous animals."

Alice giggles. "I'm so happy you and Rosalie get along! I knew you would, though. That's why I set you up."

I smile. She did set us up.

"It's just… I had Bella, and Rosalie…didn't really like Bella at first, you know, and sort of needed a friend of her own, and I heard from Bella and Jake that you were bitter."

"Thanks."

"And infertile."

"Thanks again."

"And I thought, 'bitter and infertile, that sounds like Rose!'"

"Have you told Rosalie this version of events? I'm sure she'd appreciate it as much as I am."

"Now that all your ridiculous Pack drama is over, can we all hang out again? You and me and Bella and Rose?"

"And we can paint our nails, and sew matching aprons, and make muffins!"

"You are so sarcastic," she says, glaring at me. "Anyway, you're the only one who could eat a muffin."

"…blood muffins?"

"Would you really make 'blood muffins' with us?"

"…It's probably against Tribal Law, making blood muffins with vampires."

"What the hell is a 'blood muffin?'" says Rosalie from the doorway. In an instant she's sitting on the edge of the bed with Alice. Vampire speed and all that.

"We don't know. Something we are going to cook together," Alice tells her.

"It's a flavor of muffin, obviously," I say. "I will have _chocolate _muffins, you can have _blood _muffins."

"There are different flavors of blood, though," says Rosalie.

I make a face. "Well, there are different flavors of chocolate. Anyway, I don't want to hear anymore about your disgusting food habits. We can't cook together, anyway. Aren't you all leaving town?"

"That's just Bella and Edward and Nessie," says Alice. "At least for now."

"So you're definitely not coming?" Rosalie asks.

"Jacob's the Alpha, remember? He has to stay now, and… be the Alpha for La Push."

"So you're definitely staying with Jacob then?" she continues.

"….yeah."

"Because the last time we talked, you were all '_noooo, I can't be with Jake, that would hurt his chances of happiness."_

"That was before Jake and Sam actually fought."

"You mean before Edward and I talked sense into you," Rosalie says.

"Yes. But there's no way Jake could leave now. So…"

"So it sorted itself out without you messing around and trying to make things better by breaking his heart?" interjects Alice. I glower at her.

"If you _had _broken up," says Rosalie, "it would have created serious problems for my wedding."

"Oh yes, let's make everything about you," says Alice, smiling.

"No, but seriously. Jake's going to be one of Emmett's groomsmen, and it would have been awkward having Jake and Leah there together if they weren't together anymore. Although, they probably would have just gotten drunk at the reception and had wild sex."

"Rosalie Hale!" Alice scolds. "Not everyone on the planet is like you!"

"What are you, Edward?" Rosalie asks. "Don't be such a hypocrite. Remind me, again, how long you knew Jasper for before you….?"

Alice glares at Rosalie and mutters, "That's different."

"Oh, right, because you _knew _you were _soulmates_," as she says it, she waves her hands around, imitating butterflies or fairies.

"I had visions of us getting married! And I knew… anyway, when you've had visions of something, it's not such a big deal."

"Lots of girls have 'visions' of marrying boys their barely know," mutters Rosalie under her breath.

"Wait, hold up. Not just marriage. You had visions of having sex with Jasper before you'd met him?" I ask Alice. I am genuinely intrigued.

Alice looks away. "I don't really want to talk about it. _Anyway_, we should let Leah rest more."

"Aren't your visions not always true? Aren't they just possibilities?" Rosalie pesters. "So it wasn't like you _had _to…"

"Rose, I never claimed to be Edward-McSelf-Restraint!"

"He's not really Mr McSelf-Restraint," Rosalie says. "He only waited, what, a year and a half before he married Bella? He's just Edward-McPrudypants."

I snort with laughter and it makes my broken ribs ache. I'm about to add something, perhaps another nickname for Edward, when the man himself appears.

"Ladies, you know I can hear everything you're thinking, right?" he asks, glaring at us.

"No, Edward! Do you have some sort of special ability to read minds? Please, do tell me about it!" says Rosalie.

Edward just rolls his eyes and walks away. As soon as he's gone we all burst out laughing. "I can hear you!" he shouts from wherever he's gone off to.

"Well, to be honest, as a vampire, blood is really our primary drive," says Alice.

"Yeah, and Edward always claimed that blood was better than sex, even though _he'd never had sex_," adds Rosalie.

"Is it?" I ask.

Rosalie answers first. "Not really. About the same." Wow. No wonder they're always hunting.

"Jasper says…" Alice begins. "Jasper says that human blood is."

I wonder what Bella would think of that little revelation. "Well, werewolves like sex. A lot."

"Feeling better, then, Miss Clearwater?" asks Dr Cullen, who of course is now standing in the doorway. (Appearing in doorways—the Cullens' secret hobby?)

"Yes, thank you. How is everyone else?"

"Oh, all your packmates will be fine. That boy you nearly destroyed, Paul, he will recover as well, but I had a very difficult time setting a few of his bones. I had Emily and the twins moved to the Forks hospital last night. They need a bit more care than I alone can give, and when I examined the babies, I didn't see anything particularly shapeshiftery about them that would give them away. In any case, I will remain their primary physician."

I just nod.

"Before you came in, we were just comparing—" Alice begins, by way of explanation, but Carlisle holds up his hand.

"I really, _really_, don't want to know." And then he's gone.

"Come on," Alice says to her sister, "we should let Leah sleep." They stand up, and on the way out of the door, Alice adds, "Come downstairs when you feel up to it. They're might even be food, assuming your brother hasn't eaten it all."

"Which means there won't be," I say, and lay back on the pillows, but I'm smiling. Something I haven't done in awhile.

* * *

Maybe I drift off, maybe I don't. I don't even know what time it is—this room has thick curtains covering the floor-to-ceiling windows. Of course, the Cullens are exactly the sort of vampires to live in a glass house…And since the feeble Forks daylight doesn't bother them, I guess they just like enjoying the views…of trees.

This room must be all set-up for us creatures who _sleep_.

Most everything in the Crypt is modern, but the curtains here look like Carlisle stole them from a medieval castle. I amuse myself for a few minutes imagining Carlisle, in a black facemask, prowling around a castle by moonlight.

The bedspread, too, looks vaguely medieval. I wonder if he stole it from the same castle? Or maybe two Transylvanian castles had the same interior design, having both shopped at the Medieval Wal-Mart.

Or maybe, seeing as how Esme does a bit of interior decorating when she's not….um…. making quilts for children who were orphaned by blood diseases (hey, it's as good of a guess as any), maybe Esme got a hold of these decorations from some chic store that sells faux-medieval decorations. I like the first version better.

There's no clock in here either, so I can't tell how much time I've wasted thinking about this. Or maybe I've been asleep this whole time, and this is all just a drug-induced dream. (Surely Dr. Cullen _must_ have hooked me up with some awesome painkillers, right? Otherwise I'd be dead right now.)

I blink. Jake's here. He's sticking his head through the door.

"Hey." I had forgotten how nice his voice sounds. Even though right now, he sounds a bit like a zombie.

"Are you feeling alright?" I ask quickly. I'm worried I might already be blushing. Obviously I want to see him. Obviously. But…he seemed pretty pissed at me before the fight. And after the fight… He didn't really respond to my declaration of love. If you can call it that. Well, he said my name. At the time, it was so nice, how he said it. But maybe that was just the blood loss talking.

I am not ready for him now. I'm half-dead myself, giddy about drapery. I was going to go find _him_. He'd be in bed, I'd come over to him. It would be on my time. Damnit, how dare he come! I wish he'd say something now.

"Sure, sure. I'm getting better. In another day or two I should be good as new." He's all the way in the room now. Shirtless, of course. The marks on his chest are faint lines, but some of the bite marks around his neck are still pretty bad looking. Like fresh scars. Sam must have gotten him deep. There's one cut running from his side down to his hip, and I assume it goes down his leg, probably from when he was flipped or on his back or something. I only mention it because my eyes keep being drawn to it, to the place where it disappears under the waistband of his sweatpants. Scratch that, Emmett's sweatpants. Jake would never own anything from Abercrombie and Fitch.

"You?" he asks. Damnit, why does Jacob always get to look sexy as hell, and I look (I'm assuming) like a drowned puppy? At least I am under the massive bedspread.

"Uh, yeah, I'm fine." Leah Clearwater, queen of casual.

"That's not what Dr. Cullen told me," he says, and he seems to be inching closer. Or the room is shrinking.

I shrug. Shrugging hurts. I try to hide my grimace. "I can ask him to bring you more painkillers," Jake says. His voice is all concern. Does that mean he's not still mad at me? No, scratch that. I'm his beta… he'd be showing this much concern for anyone in the Pack.

"I'm alright," I insist.

He smiles at me, that insanely happy smile that disappeared when things heated up between him and Sam.

"You feel better then?" I ask, and he starts to respond, but then realizes I don't mean physically. He smiles again and nods. Now he's sitting on the corner of the bed. The corner farthest from me.

"Yeah. Like….well, I'd say 'a whole new person,' but it isn't that at all. Like how I used to be. Except better."

I smile and then bite my lip. Should I say something? Like "sorry I tried to break up with you, just kidding, didn't really mean it, luv ya babes?"

He speaks, though. "Have you seen Sam?" Ok, odd question.

"No. You?"

"Nah. Apparently they first doctored me up in his house, though."

"Yeah, I was there. You were on the kitchen counter."

"Did I fit?"

"About half of you did."

"No wonder I hurt so many places."

"That might be from the fight."

And then, so help me god, he starts looking like he's going to kiss me. Leaning forward and all that. I lean forward, too, a bit, and stare at his lips. But then he blinks a few times.

"Leah," his voice is different now. It was getting all flirtatious there for a second, but now that's gone from it. "Quil said you were going to break up with me. 'For my own good.' And then your brother, today, said you weren't. And I remember something from after the fight about 'goddamnit, I love you.'"

"…and then you passed out." It's hard to speak, my throat is so dry all of a sudden.

"Did you mean it?"

"Mean what?"

"Any of it? The part about wanting to leave me? The part about…about…_loving _me?"

"I never _wanted_ to leave you," I say. He is quiet, staring at me. Forcing me to reply, to stop stalling. "Yes. I meant it. The part at the end."

"Then, Leah Clearwater, I love you, very, very much." He doesn't say it quickly, nor does he drag it out. And it doesn't sound like he's struggling to say those words. "You don't have to say it again, yet, if you aren't ready. But I want to hear it eventually," he says. Or rather, he tries to say.

Because half-way through 'eventually' I'm kissing him. We just kiss, our bodies not even really touching, just straining forward.

And then, finally, one of us starts moving. I don't know if it's me, pulling, or him, pushing, but soon my head is on the pillow and he's above me, resting his weight on his forearm. I don't know if it hurts him, but I do know he's keeping his weight off of my broken ribs.

"We probably shouldn't be doing this," he whispers, and of course, the sound of his voice like that sends chills through my body and I press against him. I suddenly hate the medieval bedspread more than I've hated anything before in my life. It was probably sewn by nuns and imbued with man-repellant.

"Shut up, Jake," I whisper back, and he does. One of my hands is trying to shove the nun-spread down, while the other is against his back. And then, just as I am making progress with the sex-preventing comforter, Jacob starts kissing my neck. Screw the bedspread, he can sort it out. I am now a trembling puddle of feminine goo on a painkiller high. The world is my oyster.

"Leah," he whispers against my neck.

"Mmm?"

"Leah, promise me you won't leave me and force me to marry Nessie?"

I say "mmm" at exactly the same time the door opens and Emmett says, "Oh. Um. Sorry."

Jake's off me in less than a second. Emmett, meanwhile, is staring at a corner. I pull the bedspread back up over my chest. Thank you, nun-made bedspread. I love you! You and the kindly Sisters of Mercy who made you.

"I was just, um, bringing you some lunch." And indeed, Emmett has a plate with a sandwich on it. "It's everything your brother hasn't eaten. Okay then, I'll just take this downstairs. Carry on."

And with that, Emmett is gone. Before either of us has time to react, he's back, but this time he just sticks his head in. "Jake, buddy, you can't hold them to any promises they make when you're kissing their necks. They'll say anything."

He looks like he's about to leave, and then adds, "also, try locking the door."

"Well, that was awkward," I say, finally.

"I'll go lock the door," Jake says, and by the time I speak again, he's halfway there.

"Um, what?"

"Door? Lock? So that doesn't happen again?"

"...you can't seriously be… I mean….shouldn't we just go downstairs?"

"Are you sure you're well enough for that?" he asks, without a trace of irony.

"Do you seriously want to keep going?" I ask him.

"Well…..yeah."

"Didn't…that….kind of kill the mood?" I make sort of wavey hand gestures to indicate Emmett's appearance.

"Only temporarily." He locks the door and bounds back to the bed.

"Hm, no," I say. "For one thing, what the _hell _was he wearing?" I wasn't really paying attention, but I seem to be recall something black and shiny and…sparkly…and….mesh.

"Okay, can we not talk about Emmett's fashion choice now? It's going to make it hard for me to make love to you if you go on like that."

"Yeah, exactly. It's all I can think about, though." Sounds crazy, I know. But…. Either I imagined it, or Emmett's wearing just about the gayest party shirt I've ever seen. I tell Jake this.

"Leah, that's a bit…. I mean, I am sure straight boys can wear shirts like that."

"Yeah…when they go to gay bars and pretend to be gay to pick up girls."

"Does that work?" he asks, looking genuinely interested. Seeing my face he holds up his hands. "I didn't mean _for me_. I meant, are girls really that….what kind of girl goes to a gay bar to meet men?"

"Jake! Can we focus on what's important here?"

"Sure, sure," and he leans forward to kiss me.

"Did I imagine it, or was Emmett's shirt _mesh_? As in _see-through_?"

"Are you sure you don't want to—"

"I can't sleep with you when I'm thinking about Emmett's sparkly shirt, Jake."

"Well thank god for that. No, what I was going to say is, don't you want to talk about… you know, the whole you-leaving-me thing?"

I sigh. "Do we have to?"

"No. Well, actually, yes. I thought this whole time that you were okay with the imprinting situation, and then suddenly, on the eve of the fight, you decide to turn into _Edward_. I need to know if you plan on doing that again."

"Loveleech is the one who talked me out of it," I say quietly. Not that it puts him on my good side. Put it like this, Nessie is by far the least annoying of the three of them. And for a _middle school girl_ to be less annoying to someone in their midtwenties than the girl's parents… that's saying something.

"I guess I should go and thank him then," Jake says, sounding slightly bitter.

"Don't!" I say, and reach out for one of his hands. If I stare at his hand in mine, I won't have to look him in the eyes, which will make talking about this much easier. "Look…I didn't mind how you were when the Sam thing started. Maybe it's because the same thing was happening to me, I don't know. I mean, when I fought Paul, I really, really wanted to hurt him. So when you were getting ready for the fight, when you got all obsessed with Sam, I didn't mind. I knew that after the fight, you'd go back to normal."

"And there's no going back to normal with Nessie, is that it?" he asks.

"No! That's not what I'm saying! Just let me finish. Anyway, you weren't happy before the fight. You didn't laugh, or smile, or joke around, or do any of the Jake-things. But it was fine, because I knew it was just the Alpha stuff. But then, when we were over here, with my mom, and Charlie, and Seth, and Quil, and Embry… I saw you playing with Nessie. And you were happy again."

"That's because I'm not myself when I'm with Nessie!"

"I know that! But… the point is, you were happy, and smiling, and I wanted you to be happy."

"But I want to be with _you_," he insists. I think he's staring at the knot of our hands, too.

"I know, Jake, and I want to be with you. And it was stupid and I am not going to try to get you to be with Nessie. I'm just trying to explain what I was thinking when I made what is admittedly a very bad decision. Look. I….love you," the words sound awkward to me. I'm very, very conscious of saying them. The opposite of flowing from my lips. "I just thought you might be happier with Nessie than you would be staying in La Push being Alpha to the masses."

"You were wrong," he says quietly.

"I know." I finally get up the courage to look up at him. He's looking down, just like I was. "Jake," I say softly, and he lifts his eyes to mine. "Are you ready to be the Alpha of La Push?"

He shrugs and smiles, "ready as I'll ever be, I guess."

My stomach grumbles and he laughs. "Ok, let's get you fed. Come on."

Downstairs it looks like any day in the Crypt. Jasper is in a corner with _The Seattle Times _in front of his face. Edward and Nessie are playing a piano duet. Rosalie, Alice and Bella are looking at literature from various florists for the big wedding plans. Emmett's nowhere to be seen, and neither is my brother. For all I know, he's eaten all the food and left to find someone else to feed him, like my mom. I am guessing Carlisle and Esme are in Carlisle's study.

"Hey, you're up!" says Rosalie as I come downstairs. "Feeling arlight?"

"Oh, ha ha." I say.

"What?" she asks.

"Like Emmett didn't tell you," I glare at her. Of course they are going to tease me.

"Tell me what?"

"Oh." Ok, maybe he didn't.

I'm just coming into the room when Emmett appears from the kitchen. "Oh, hey, everyone! I totally just walked in on Leah and Ja—" he starts, and then sees me. "Hi, Leah. How are you?"

Jake rolls his eyes at him and punches him on the shoulder. "Mind your own business."

"Emmett!" scolds Rosalie. "You shouldn't just barge in on people!"

"I didn't mean to! It isn't my fault _they didn't lock the door!_"

"Well you should have listened at the door to make sure they weren't having sex!" Rosalie continues.

"Oh, sorry, I'm not the sort of person who goes around _listening at doors_ to see if people are having sex like you, _dear_."

"Well, make-up sex is the best kind of sex, and now you've gone and ruined Jake and Leah's make-up sex! So I hope you're happy!" she fumes.

Edward slams both hands down on the keyboard and turns to face the room. "Could you _not _have this conversation? How about that?"

Alice looks like she's trying to stop herself from giggling.

"Ugh, fine! I'll just leave then, shall I?" Edward says as he rises from the piano bench. He gives Emmett a particularly vicious glare, from which I gather that Emmett's employing his infamous (if overused) strategy: 'think about sex to annoy Edward.'

As soon as he's gone, Nessie starts playing the piano alone.

"Emmett," I say. "Your shirt is…um…."

"…gay?" finishes his wife.

"Oh shut up, no it isn't."

Rosalie just looks at me. "Honestly, Leah, he's being ridiculous. He's spent the last few days running around the house topless—"

"So Jacob and Seth can run around topless and I can't?" Emmett interjects.

"And forcing everyone to look at his scars. Especially Jasper. And then he shouts things like, _'how do you like them apples, hmmm? Who got attacked by a bear now, hmmmm?'_ So last night we told him he had to start wearing shirts. So he found this…see-through….thing…. so that everyone can still be forced to admire his scars." She waves her hand in the direction of Emmett.

"Well, if my shirt _is _gay, it's only because I got it out of Jasper's closet."

Jasper, very slowly, lowers his paper and sighs. "Emmett…what the hell is wrong with you. You know very well that nothing so tacky would ever, _ever _be in my closet. And I don't know what you are insinuating, but I am just going to treat you like toddler you are, and _ignore_ you."

"You ignore toddlers?" Bella asks from the couch.

"When he's not kicking them," Jacob adds. Probably truthfully.

"It's not _my _fault I was mauled by a bear!" says Emmett.

"You weren't mauled by a bear," Jasper tells him calmly. "You ran in front of two very large wolf-shapeshifter things and they gave you a couple paper-cuts." He holds out one hand to demonstrate the next part of his sentence with his fingers. "One wolf plus one wolf does not equal one bear."

"I got mauled by a bear _a long time ago_ but you made fun of me for not having scars, and now I have the scars, and Emily got attacked by Sam, and she told everyone it was a bear, so now I am going to tell everyone I was mauled by a bear!"

"….Okay, Emmett, whatever makes you happy," says Jasper tiredly. He picks up his paper and mutters something that sounds like "drunk…imaginary bear…probably paid Jake to do it anyway."

"Whatever, Jasper, why don't you go back to the South and eat some collard greens!" says Emmett before throwing himself onto the sofa opposite the girls.

"Want to see if there's food in the kitchen?" asks Jake.

"Yes."

Tomorrow, or maybe the day after, we can return to La Push and Jake can start being the Alpha. Today, I just want to be here.

* * *

Authors Note:

I hope you enjoyed this chapter… it's definitely not the end. I was originally going to make it 9 chapters, but there was too much material for this chapter not to split it up. So stay tuned for the final chapter of Red Sky at Morning… which will really be a sort of wrap-up, wind-down, epilogue. Yes, you heard me. _Epilogue_. And no, no one is naming their child Albus Severus. (I bet Renesmee would, though. Poor kid doesn't know any better.)

Please review! This is your last chance to say if there's anything you're curious about/want to hear more about/feel that the Cullens need more (computer)screen time…


	10. Epilogue

**Author's Note:**

My sincere apologies for having kept you all waiting so long. This chapter has been in my head since about halfway through Endless Daylight (think last August) so of course it was the hardest to write. You have no idea how many times it's been completely rewritten. Yes, that's right, as soon as I got it decent, my laptop died and I had to start again. Well, it's probably better because of that.

And again, thank you for your patience and for not giving up on me!

I know it's a bit strange to finally get the end of the story a good two months or more after the climax, but there you have it. Also, I have tried to answer all the questions you had, which was easy, since many of them were sort of the point of this chapter. However, a few are meant to be left open. For example, I like to see Embry's feelings for Leah as quite ambiguous. He's not exactly in love with her, but he's learned to respect her. Nor is it _entirely_ innocent.

* * *

Three weeks after the fight, everything changes. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Calm down Leah, tell it properly.

It's a cliché to say that sometimes things don't turn out how you plan them. It's the sort of thing I'd expect Bella to say, something that I'd have to bite my tongue from keeping myself from responding, "Golly! I had no idea!" It's also the kind of thing I'd expect to be true of Bella's life—one day she's the new girl in Forks, the next she's married to a vampire, is immortal herself, and has a kid with crazyass mental powers.

In Bella's case, everything turned out perfect. And then there's me. One day I'm happy with my darling, the next he's a freaking Alpha and he breaks my heart because of imprinting. And then I'm watching my father be buried.

Oh, right. I'm talking about Sam here.

Jacob, well, that is going to take some explanation. That's my point. Bella's the one who gets the happily-ever-after, right? So where did mine come from?

We couldn't stay at the Cullens' house forever, even though we both wanted to. I watched him lounge on their leather sofas, his posture as horrible as ever, but his face looking strangely older, while my brother, Captain Food Vacuum himself, scomped down enough food to feed a family. I was sitting between Alice and Rosalie. Jake was next to Seth who was next to Edward. It felt oddly _right _in some horribly wrong way. What would Quil Senior have said?

I didn't want to leave, but we had to, eventually. La Push was waiting for its Alpha.

Nothing much changed on the Rez, expect to the wolves. Jake, as promised, made his first official action to lift the command of silence, so now all the wolves can tell their parents. Embry's mother may finally understand his behavior as a teenager. Not that it really matters anymore, since almost no one phases accidentally these days, and certainly no one in our pack, er….. you know, the five of us that used to be a pack.

So everything was great, I guess. Except not really, because we were all still in transition. Sam's boys were still licking their wounds, proverbially and literally. For three weeks.

Three weeks. That's how long Jake was Alpha of La Push for. But I'm not to that part of my story yet. Hang on, let me describe it.

Three weeks after the fight, I finally saw Sam. He'd been at home, with Emily and the twins. I was heading over to the Cullens' place to help them pack or something. I don't know. Nessie invited me. I thought at the time that it was just an excuse for her to quiz me about what middle school is like. Her plan was to enroll as an 8th grader. Sure, she looks a bit too young to be in 8th grade, but girls at that age can look older or younger. And that way, she'll have a good five years in wherever they've decided to go. Wait, somewhere in Oregon, Edward told me. Sounded dull to me, but then again, I guess someplace warm like California was out of the question ("look, mom! I sparkle!")

Poor kid was desperate to fit in at school. She wanted to be a "regular human being," as she kept telling me. I told her that the first thing she should do is stop saying "regular human being."

Her mom was no help, Mrs. Queen of "I don't fit in, which is actually my own fault because I never socialize blah blah." Ahem. And her dad and aunts and uncles…. Well, I guess being leeches sort of limited their prospects for socializing.

Anyway, three weeks of Jacob being Alpha, of living in my mom's old house, of falling asleep in his arms every night and waking up pressed against him every morning. And then, there I was, walking along toward the woods, minding my own business, when I saw Sam through the fog that clung to the road.

"Leah!" he said. Not "Lee Lee."

I stopped and looked at him. He had no marks left from what Jake did to him. Of course not, why would he? Wolves heal quickly. Still, it seemed odd. But then I looked at him more closely and realized he had changed, like Jake had changed. I can't describe it now, and I certainly couldn't then. But he looked…

Well, maybe it was the whole "fatherhood" thing.

"How are you?" he asked, and unlike about every conversation we'd had since I phased the first time, he didn't sound patronizing.

"Yeah, I'm alright, you?"

He smiled and I couldn't decide if he seemed dead or happy. Sounds crazy, I know. But he was lacking his usual… um, fanaticism. He looked like a normal person.

"Wanna meet them?"

"What?"

"My sons. Do you want to meet my sons?" And he smiled again and I knew, without a doubt, that Sam didn't' look dead. He just looked tired. And he was the happiest I had ever seen him. Ever.

"Yeah, okay."

I followed him home. For so long, before I had Jacob, I thought of Emily's house as everything I should have had. But now that it's _their _house, and more importantly, now that I don't care, it just seemed surreal. Like the first time you see your fourth grade teacher at the grocery store and realize she has a life outside of teaching you cursive, and you sort of thing _oh. right. I should have known that_. Sam and Emily's house was like that. It seemed like this alternate universe where people my age were adults.

One look at the living room and Sam wasn't my ex-boyfriend anymore. And he wasn't the ex-Alpha, either. He was a husband to Emily and a father to his sons. I followed him to their bedroom, where a crib had been set up for the boys. Emily was there, holding one while his brother napped.

The look that passed between Sam and Emily wasn't nauseating, although it should have been. Whatever spell had come over me walking into Sam's house must have hit me pretty hard if them staring at each other like that didn't make me feel ill. Wordlessly, Sam picked up the sleeping baby and handed it to me.

To me. The infertile girl with zero baby experience. I don't think torturing Seth as an infant qualifies me to hold Sam's kid… what was he thinking? I could drop the thing.

But I didn't. The baby stirred when I took it from Sam and looked at me. "That's Ephraim," Sam said quietly. He nodded with his head toward the baby Emily was holding, "and that's Levi."

I paused. "You named your kids after my great-grandfathers?"

He smiled and Emily laughed softly. "Yeah. You know, wolf names. Anyway , Levi was my ancestor, too."

"I noticed," I said dryly.

"And we thought," Emily started, and stopped, and started again, speaking slowly, "we thought that Ephraim was a good name. We wanted La Push to have an Ephraim and a Levi who are brothers. Who won't tear us all apart."

I heard what she wasn't saying. That Ephraim was Jake's ancestor, and that Jake and Sam were passed their...power-struggle? Their whatever the hell it was that made them both crazy.

We were all quiet a moment, and then Sam said, "do you want to hold Levi?"

"Uh, okay," I said, and we traded infants. There was another pause, and I became aware that Sam and Emily were looking at me kind of oddly.

"You alright?" Emily asked kindly.

"…..yeah," I said, trying to figure out what they were talking about. When people ask me that, it makes me wonder why I _shouldn__'__t _be okay. I mean, what did they know that I didn't?

"Oh." Emily said, and laughed. "It's going to sound really stupid now. It's just, Sam and I thought… we wondered if you might…imprint on one of the twins."

To my credit, I did not drop the baby. But I did nearly choke on my own tongue.

"Sorry to disappoint," I managed to squeak out.

Neither of them seemed to be as uncomfortable as I was. Is that what they thought I needed? Just to imprint, and then everything would be okay. My face must have betrayed me.

"Lee Lee," Sam said, of course he said it, he can't give up that nickname for the life of him. But the way he said it... how a man talks to his sister. "We aren't judging you. It's not that we don't want you to be with Jacob. It's just... there'd me symmetry to it, wouldn't there?"

Symmetry. Yes. I'd imprint on the son of the man who broke my heart, just as Jake had imprinted on the daughter of the woman who'd broken his.

...Symmetry...

And in that instant, I swear to god, everything suddenly made sense. I realized what I had to do, what Jake had to do. How things had to be and why everything else was wrong.

"Do you love your sons?" I asked Sam.

"Yes!" He looked aghast that I had to ask. Emily was looking from him to me and back. I think she knew I'd figured something out.

"More than you love the Tribe?"

"....it's not the same..."

"Sam, answer the question," I pressed, "do you love your sons more than you love the Tribe?"

He sort of stood there with is mouth open, and then finally, "My sons are part of the Tribe."

"Yeah, okay, I'll take that as a yes. Thank you. I have to go now." I handed Levi back to Sam and left the Uleys' house as quickly as I could without openly running.

I haven't seen Sam since, and that was over a year ago.

* * *

Symmetry. That was the problem. Jake as Alpha, Sam as beta, just like their great-grandfathers were. The Cullens leave, just like they did before. Then in a few generations they come back. Sam and Jake and I are all long dead. Sam's great-grandsons, descended from his twins, don't like the Cold Ones, because they've heard the old stories, but they don't _know_, because they aren't wolves yet. And then, suddenly, they are, because the Cullens are back.

I ran to find Jacob. Nessie and her packing could wait.

I remember running into the room we shared, and practically shouting at him in the passion of my realization.

"You don't love Nessie like Sam loves Emily. You love her like Sam loves his sons."

He just stared at me, and I ran to him and threw my arms around his shoulders, clinging to him. "Jake, we don't belong here. Sam does. He has his sons to think of now, and he's not like how he used to be. He owes the life of the three people he loves most in the world to Dr Cullen, and he won't forget it. And... Levi and Ephriam deserve to never have to worry about protecting the Tribe from the Cold Ones."

"Leah," he said, like he wasn't entirely following me, "The Cullens are leaving. Sam's sons won't phase."

"But their sons, or their grandsons, or their _daughters_, might. Don't you see? We don't belong here, either of us. I'm the only one of my kind, and you, you've imprinted on a vampire half-breed. Jake, Sam's....Sam's probably the best thing for La Push right now."

He didn't say anything. Just looked at me.

"I know he's not the proper Alpha," I started, because I didn't want Jake to think that's what I was saying, "I know you are. But..."

And he kissed me. I would have said so many things. I would have explained it all to him, said that when the Cullens came back one day, we'd be there, too. Or else we'd help make sure the Cullens never came back, so no teenagers at La Push would ever have to worry about what was happening to them. But whatever happened, we'd be there. Our destinies belonged to the Cullens, because Jake had imprinted on Nessie, because Rosalie understood me, and because we were so clearly different from everyone else on the Rez...

"Leah, I love you." He said, between kisses.

"Jacob...."

* * *

Along the Oregon coast is a small town. Small, but big enough to have a college. That's where Jake and I live now. We go to school. He has no idea what he wants to major in, but he has plenty of time to figure it out. I keep taking classes in Indigenous Peoples Studies and Women's Studies.

No one thinks there's anything odd about us. We've sort of made casual friends with people. Normal people, I mean. Seth keeps driving down to visit, even though it takes about a day to get down here. I think he's going to move down soon. Mom would be happy if he went to school. Embry, too, might come, but right now he's staying with Quil, who would never leave Claire. Seth, between eating all the food in our place and worshipping Jake, tells us that things at the Rez are going well. No one runs patrols any more. The Cullens are gone, and Sam is much less of a zealot. Seth said it was because he knew he was only beta and that if he got out of line Jake would come home and smack him down.

Jake and I know it's because of his new family.

I talked to my mom on the phone yesterday. She's happy. Things at the Rez are so calm now. Tomorrow, Seth's driving down to visit, again. Embry is coming with him, but he's probably going to try very hard to avoid the leeches. Oh, right, the leeches. Yeah, they're here too.

As far as anyone here knows, Jake and I are just two college students. Maybe early twenties, maybe mid twenties. We rent a small duplex. It's owned by the new doctor in town and his wife. They moved here just before we did, and everyone seems to like them. The doctor works in the hospital here and his wife just got hired to be the art teacher at the middle school. They have us over for dinner a lot, and I am pretty sure anyone who is nosy enough to notice thinks its sweet. The young-looking married couple being so friendly toward the students who rent their property. (In case you were wondering, no one eats dinner at the dinner parties. Well, sometimes they make some food for Jake and I and Nessie.)

The other half of the duplex just got rented last month. To another young couple who just came back from their honeymoon. In Paris. Luckily, we get along with our neighbors really well. They can be intimidating to other people at first, but most who meet them realize that they are friends with us, and immediately think they are more normal. If they had any suspicion that there was something wrong, they push it out of their minds. Just imagining the cold glint to their skin.

Still, if anyone saw the scars running up Emmett's chest and back, they might go back to thinking he's terrifying.

And then there's Nessie. She's as happy as I can imagine anyone being. In 8th grade, and making friends much more easily than her mother ever did. She's even invited some of her friends home before.

A lot of people already know Nessie's story. Or rather, her "story." The people she calls her parents are, quite obviously, way too young to be her real parents. Her parents died a few years ago, and since then she's been with her mother's brother, Edward, and his young wife, who is also a student at the same college as me and Jake. So no one thinks its odd we know them, either. Edward doesn't go to school, because he has to work.

In a bookstore. That he owns. It sells used books, most of which are crumbling. And it smells like old books in there, too. It's very... well, sort of where you'd expect undercover vampires to hang out. It's called "The Swan." Which is sort of vomit-inducing, if you ask me.

There's an apartment above where he lives with Bella and Nessie. I guess he's had a lot of years to read during (Rose told me he used to read a lot before he met Bella). It was Nessie's idea, actually, and it does help the cover story. At Alice's insistence, he started wearing fake glasses. Those, along with him working, make him seem older. He can pass for early twenties, maybe 24. That helps explain Nessie, and also why he's married. No one would entrust a child to a seventeen year old boy, after all.

Frankly, I think their cover stories this time around are much better than all pretending to be in high school. Rosalie and Alice told me that pretending to be students meant they could stay in one town longer, but since they have Nessie now, they don't need it. Ha, I'd love to see Bella and Edward posing as high school students with a daughter.

Emmett works at the bookstore, which means it's worth going just for the comedy value. It also gives him and Rosalie a reason for being over there a lot. And since we're their neighbors, well, see, it all folds in on itself. Rosalie is still trying to figure out what to do. She says she's sick of doing high school and college over and over.

Hey, it's better than us all living together in a giant....monster compound. That was what Bella thought we'd do, I think.

Nessie spends a lot of time at our place, as well. Convenient that Jake and I share a backyard with Rosalie and Emmett. Bella and Edward are over a lot, too, and yes, Edward's always harassing us about getting married. Esme and Carlisle come, too. (My mom and Charlie came out to visit last year for Christmas. It was pretty amazing. Seth came along. I think Charlie is happier now that he finally knows the truth. And has had time to adjust. And has my mom.)

You're probably wondering about Alice and Jasper. They've been here, but they've gone again. I think they're just taking some time to enjoy each other. Alice and I are close, not as close as I am with Rosalie, but close. Still, she hasn't told me every thought that crosses her mind. But every month or so they drop by. Unnoticed by everyone but us. Although, now that Jasper's twin sister is our neighbor, I think they might stay longer, since a cover story is already in place. Maybe they can rent somewhere to live from our landlords. Alice talks about going and getting another degree in fashion design. I kind of want her to open a little boutique shop, personally, but maybe that's just me.

I have a feeling Jasper's enjoying travelling where every they are going. Of course, they were at Rosalie and Emmett's wedding in Paris.

As I said, Nessie is so happy now. She's starting to feel normal. Have her own life experiences, instead of just reading about them.

I guess she gets a happy ending, too.

And I still get to fall asleep in Jake's arms every night. He whispers he loves me as I fall asleep, and we both know that the other has no regrets. We are both their for Nessie. And the Cullens are there for us.

* * *

"Are you going to tell her?" my wife asks, leaning over my shoulder and looking at the papers on my desk.

"No, dear," I say, taking her hand and kissing it. "She's young. They're both young. They have got plenty of time to worry about that later."

My wife is quiet, but I know what she's thinking. That she had a child when she was younger than they are now. But, to use a cliché, times are different now. And neither of them seems ready to be a parent. "In any case, love," I tell her, "they'd have to stop phasing first."

"Surely just she would?"

"Can you imagine Leah not phasing if Jacob still were? For one thing, she'd start aging and he wouldn't…"

"Oh, yes, it's _terrible _when you're with a younger man!" my wife teases. I could remind her that Leah's already older than Jacob, or that _technically_, I'm older than my wife, having been born centuries earlier.

"I still think you might want to mention it to them," she insists, returning to the topic of our discussion. "Otherwise they're in for a rather large surprise if they ever _do _stop phasing."

"I somehow think Jacob will better handle that particular 'surprise' than did Edward."

Esme has come to lean against my desk now, so I can see that she smiles when I say that.

"Wouldn't it be lovely if they had a daughter, though?' she asks. "One with Leah's genes? Do you think her daughter would be able to phase?" she's put this question to me about a dozen times now. And every time I've told her the tests I ran on Leah weren't _that _detailed… I'd probably have to extract eggs from her to tell that kind of information, and that procedure in and of itself might cause complications that decrease her chance of conceiving.

"I don't know. I thought you'd root for a boy…" I say it as a joke. My wife still wants to see Nessie end up with Nahuel. I suppose as grandparents its none of our business whom she marries, but I think we'd all like to hope it will be someone as quirky and unique as our little angel (for all that she hates being called that!).

"No, that's _you, _dear," she teases back, but she's right. I would like to see it, one day. Although, from everything I know of Jacob's father, I don't think he'd approve of uniting our bloodlines. Nor, I hazard to guess, would old Ephraim have signed the treaty with me so long ago if he'd known that one day I'd entertain such an idea.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

*sigh* The end.

When I started writing this in my head last August, there were lots of moments of the Cullens and Leah and Jake spending time together in their new locale. On about the second or third draft, those scenes went out. For one thing, some of it had already happened earlier in this fic. For another, I didn't think it really fit with the theme of Leah closing up a certain part of her life.

However, way back when I had just barely posted the chapter before this one, I had a sudden flash of what my next Twilight fanfic is going to be. It's about Emmett. And it's really a humor and not at all serious. So stay tuned for more Culleny-interacting goodness.

Lastly, Lady Adrienne Wolfe Gentry pointed out a very obvious error. Yeah, so Emmett is also from the South. Uh huh. And I have no way of fixing that right now, so I am just going to own up and say, yeah, I am massively stupid. In my Emmett story, I will _not_ make that mistake. (The Emmett story is because I seem to have made about 100 factual errors about Emmett over the course of writing this story. So rather than read the books again to figure him out... I'm doing a fanfic.)


End file.
